The Coolcoin Poetry Slam!

[zinfamous]

Look, bitch, I worked on that 2 weeks.

that's sad

 

[highland145]

Welcome to my brain.


Bitch...just kidding.

Hold me.

 

[highland145]

..

 

[highland145]

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Bob needs a pome
We know this is true

He's giving more money
He says there will be fun
Trying to build excitement
To an audience of one

If it was Ho's
If it was coke
That's a lot more fun
Ain't no joke

Even Alky
Drew more of an audience
Popping your Ma
At her naughtiest

Here we are
Zinfamous has had a say
But his pome sucked
Just like any other day

His feels butt hurt
Just like his balls
That girl ain't givin' it
For something so small

But the day is young
The man has yet poked his nose
Perk, Perk won't you
Give us some prose

Wait, wait there is a ginger
Maybe a bit short but still a keeper
Can't have Christmas or sing a song
But he's not the reaper.

Come on ATOT
Step up your game
Show the interwebs
That we ain't so lame



Yeah, that's a turd. What do I win? 😉

Edit

 

[ultimatebob]

Edit

Adding the "slam" to poetry slam, I see! It's still missing an illustration, though

 

[highland145]

..

 

[highland145]

..

 

[brianmanahan]

i'm working on a pome for this contest,
but the process of writing a pome isn't easy.
it's actually quite long and quite hard.

it's so hard.

 

[highland145]

zin can rub it out.

 

[brianmanahan]

there once was a man
named brian, whose limericks
were really haikus.

"wait till the next verse,"
he said with a smirk, but nope -
another haiku.

shoot, i'm late for bed.
tomorrow i'll write a pome
that actually rhymes.

... it's snowing on mount fuji.

 

[EliteRetard]

i'm working on a pome for this contest,
but the process of writing a pome isn't easy.
it's actually quite long and quite hard.

it's so hard.

Call a doctor if it takes more than 3 hours.

 

[ultimatebob]

I think that Snoopy's l33t pome making skillz along with his filthy good MSPaint artwork is scaring off the competition!

 

[BudAshes]

I think that Snoopy's l33t pome making skillz along with his filthy good MSPaint artwork is scaring off the competition!

Seriously, I've read it 10 times and it makes my laugh every single time.

 

[snoopy7548]

Seriously, I've read it 10 times and it makes my laugh every single time.

Maybe I should write a book?

 

[brianmanahan]

once upon a normal weekday, just your average, boring, bleak day,
ATOT was the only way for me to waste my time -
while i scrolled and sometimes trolled posts, suddenly i saw this old post
in which bob had challenged us, had dared us write a post that rhymes.
"a pome - chock-full of inside jokes - that you must write in your spare time.
you've got until october 9th."

instantly i thought of alky - "surely he would get the trophy,"
not for a single joke he told, but for the joke he truly was.
he'd save the day, he'd bang your mom, he'd derail threads with great aplomb,
he'd brag about his new M3, about the monster that he was.
eventually he sold the car and got divorced and left this place,
but what a show he gave to us.

"certainly there must be more," i muttered as i googled for
'le epic ATOT threads' - but google didn't help at all.
so it was then my intention, to find honorable mentions
to hopefully immortalize them in this knockoff poe-like scrawl.
i'd channel poe and write a pome on ATOT's bathroom wall
of all the memes i could recall.

inflate to sidewall, spaceman posts, can i get bulk beef to roast?
"all mod forums, i can see!" and dankk please draw a pic of me.
yes nik - this REALLY is my desk! can i buy GPU with sex?
girls and spiders, jerboy scroll plus so much more - and TFP.
and now i've sat here long enough, that's all the pome you'll get from me.
just be thankful that it's free.

 

[brianmanahan]

i have channeled the spirit of edgar allen pome

 

[ultimatebob]

i have channeled the spirit of edgar allen pome

Pretty good... the contest ends on the 10th, though

 

[brianmanahan]

Pretty good... the contest ends on the 10th, though

try finding something that almost rhymes with tenth though!

 

[highland145]

Loser?

 

[brianmanahan]

Loser?

 

[highland145]

He ded.


Tap, tap, tap on that.

 

[BudAshes]

TFP's reply to @BudAshes seemed almost pome-like in itself.

----

"Whats really interesting is that you fail to mention why you were at CVS late in the night, BudAshes.

You fail to mention what you bought.
You fail to mention a lot of things.

Instead you choose to tell us about a couple in love,
and a woman kind enough to buy a gift for someone special to her.

You talk about these people as though they are the scum of the earth,
and you don't even know them.

Your snap judgements tell us everything we need to know about you, Bud Ashes.

Everyone knows this."

----

it is art in its purest form. TFP was a master.

Those were the days of the overbearing taskmaster mods. Nowadays TFP wouldn't even get a warning for his shenanigans and they would probably like his posts.

 

[zinfamous]

once upon a normal weekday, just your average, boring, bleak day,
ATOT was the only way for me to waste my time -
while i scrolled and sometimes trolled posts, suddenly i saw this old post
in which bob had challenged us, had dared us write a post that rhymes.
"a pome - chock-full of inside jokes - that you must write in your spare time.
you've got until october 9th."

ah, distinctly i recalled those, all the legendary old posts
in which posters said the things that no one here will e'er forget.
but WHICH post would the forum want, if they could only choose but one -
which inside joke would be the one that people deem the funniest?
a joke which transcends space and time, and even when the forum's dead
will never, ever leave our heads?

instantly i thought of alky - "surely he would get the trophy,"
not for a single joke he told, but for the joke he truly was.
he'd save the day, he'd bang your mom, he'd derail threads with great aplomb,
he'd brag about his new M3, about the monster that he was.
eventually he sold the car and got divorced and left this place,
but what a show he gave to us.

"certainly there must be more," i muttered as i googled for
'le epic ATOT threads' - but google didn't help at all.
so it was then my intention, to find honorable mentions
to hopefully immortalize them in this knockoff poe-like scrawl.
i'd channel poe and write a pome on ATOT's bathroom wall
of all the memes i could recall.

inflate to sidewall, spaceman posts, can i get bulk beef to roast?
"all mod forums, i can see!" and dankk please draw a pic of me.
yes nik - this REALLY is my desk! can i buy GPU with sex?
girls and spiders, jerboy scroll plus so much more - and TFP.
and now i've sat here long enough, that's all the pome you'll get from me.
just be thankful that it's free.

Get rid of the 2nd verse. It's like the wobbly 4th wheel on your grocery cart that makes you miserable.

 

[zinfamous]

He ded.


Tap, tap, tap on that.

He died on his birthday, you know.

Aged 40.

Found in a ditch.

 

[brianmanahan]

Get rid of the 2nd verse. It's like the wobbly 4th wheel on your grocery cart that makes you miserable.

"i have written what i have written"
- pontius pilate

- brian manahan

edit: since you liked it, i did it. now i like it too.