The Charleton Heston Theory

[yukichigai]

When I first heard this a while ago I thought it was great. Let me share.

The Charleton Heston Theroy

The theory is pretty basic: given any line spoken by Charleton Heston in a movie there is a 95% chance you can add a Coordinating Conjunction (For And Nor But Or Yet So) or a Semicolon-Conjunctive Adverb (e.g. "...; However, ...") followed by the phrase "I'll blow your damn head off" (allowing changes for grammar) and the meaning and tone of the line will remain unchanged. Sound confusing? Some examples:

• "Let my people go, or I'll blow your damn head off."
• "Get you hands off me you damn, dirty apes, or I'll blow your damn heads off!"
• "Soylent green is people; I'll blow your damn heads off!"

As you can see, the tone rarely changes.

There's also a corrolary with Samuel L. Jackson.

The Samuel L. Jackson Corrolary

This one is much simpler. I've found that adding "muthaf%$#a" to the end of any line spoken by Samuel L. Jackson in a movie works, again, 95% of the time. Hell, I think most of us are doing that subconsciously(sp?).

• "This party is over muthaf%$#a."
• "That is one tasty burger muthaf%$#a."
• "You are not in control muthaf%$#a!

Discuss.

 

[KLin]

Text

 

[Redviffer]

LOL, you know, you have a point there yukichigai.

 

[igowerf]

You put a lot of effort into nicely formatting that post.

 

[maziwanka]

Originally posted by: igowerf
You put a lot of effort into nicely formatting that post.

yes and i commend you for that. give that man a good rating (if he has it enabled)

 

[yukichigai]

Originally posted by: maziwanka

Originally posted by: igowerf
You put a lot of effort into nicely formatting that post.

yes and i commend you for that. give that man a good rating (if he has it enabled)

Heh, didn't even realize I had spent any time on the format. Guess all those stupid History reports I had to do in Junior High paid off.

 

[igowerf]

Originally posted by: maziwanka

Originally posted by: igowerf
You put a lot of effort into nicely formatting that post.

yes and i commend you for that. give that man a good rating (if he has it enabled)

Done!

 

[Anubis]

what movie is Soylent green from? i cant remember

 

[jjones]

Originally posted by: Anubis
what movie is Soylent green from? i cant remember

Um, Soylent Green.

 

[KLin]

Originally posted by: jjones

Originally posted by: Anubis
what movie is Soylent green from? i cant remember

Um, Soylent Green.

what color is this Soylent green?

 

[CanOWorms]

you should be awarded a Nobel Prize for this discovery

 

[Anubis]

Originally posted by: jjones

Originally posted by: Anubis
what movie is Soylent green from? i cant remember

Um, Soylent Green.

ok me=moron BUT ive never seen this movie yet for some reason Soylent Green seems familar to me

 

[yukichigai]

Originally posted by: CanOWorms
you should be awarded a Nobel Prize for this discovery

Already tried. I got beat out by some guy who found a way to infuse Beta Carotine(sp?) into rice so the poor nations of the world could get the nutrition they need. Bah, like that's better than this.