Butt pirates have been around for many years and the first known documentation of the butt pirate was in 1546 off the coast of the Mediterranean Sea. Traditionally, the legend of the butt pirate is based off Blackpoop the Buttless Pirate who lost his butt at sea while fighting the Lochness monster and Kathy Griffin at the same time.
Blackpoop the Pirate was able to defeat them both, however during battle Kathy Griffin bit Blackpoop's butt and this left poor Blackpoop severely injured and buttless. As legend goes the Lochness Monster then ate Kathy Griffin where her horrible comedy act laid dormant for many centuries until the Lochness monster eventually threw her up and released her horrible being on the unfortunate 21st Century folk.
After the epic battle of Blackpoop, the Lochness Monster and the evil she bitch Kathy Griffin, Blackpoop managed to maneuver his pirate ship, even without his butt and docked at a nearby Island. There he met a local tribe whose witch doctor was able to save Blackpoop from death by giving him a wooden butt. This is where the image of the pirate with the wooden leg came from because many pirates, to pay homage to their beloved Blackpoop, would saw of their leg and put a wooden one. (But never the butt because the butt is sacred to butt pirates).
Blackpoop roamed the seas seeking revenge on Kathy Griffin for many years. His inner turmoil left poor Blackpoop one bitter jerk, so on every voyage and raid Blackpoop vowed never to take any prisoners and instead opted to steal peoples butts.
Butt Pirate
Blackpoop the Pirate was able to defeat them both, however during battle Kathy Griffin bit Blackpoop's butt and this left poor Blackpoop severely injured and buttless. As legend goes the Lochness Monster then ate Kathy Griffin where her horrible comedy act laid dormant for many centuries until the Lochness monster eventually threw her up and released her horrible being on the unfortunate 21st Century folk.
After the epic battle of Blackpoop, the Lochness Monster and the evil she bitch Kathy Griffin, Blackpoop managed to maneuver his pirate ship, even without his butt and docked at a nearby Island. There he met a local tribe whose witch doctor was able to save Blackpoop from death by giving him a wooden butt. This is where the image of the pirate with the wooden leg came from because many pirates, to pay homage to their beloved Blackpoop, would saw of their leg and put a wooden one. (But never the butt because the butt is sacred to butt pirates).
Blackpoop roamed the seas seeking revenge on Kathy Griffin for many years. His inner turmoil left poor Blackpoop one bitter jerk, so on every voyage and raid Blackpoop vowed never to take any prisoners and instead opted to steal peoples butts.
Butt Pirate
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