I'd say Chris Rock. Not only for his stand up but for his writing on his HBO show (better than most of the stuff on network TV). Dave Chapelle also, he is very funny in interviews and Half Baked (which he co-wrote) is a pothead masterpiece.
There's this comic on Comedy Central a lot named Mitch Hedberg. He wears shoulder length hair and looks at the floor most of the time, but his one-liners are hilarious. You really have to see him to get the full effect, but here are some quotes I found:
-The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as a wall.
-I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
-I got an ant farm...them fellas didn't grow sh!t.
-A yellow light means slow down, while a green light means go. It's totally opposite on a banana. Yellow means go ahead and eat me, green means, whoa, don't eat me I'm not ready. A red banana means where the f*ck did you get that banana?
-I opened up a can of yogurt, and the bottom of the lid said "Please Try Again." Because they were having a contest I was unaware of. But I thought I opened it wrong. Or perhaps Yoplait was trying to inspire me. "Come on, Mitchell... don't give up! Please try again!" A message of inspiration from your friends at Yoplait. Fruit on the bottom, hope on top.
-I was standing in a casino when a guy came up to me and said 'Excuse me, sir. You're gonna have to move. I'm afraid you're blocking the fire exit.' As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you are flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
-Because of dropping acid, I now know that butter is way better than margarine. I saw through the bullsh!t.
-I like vending machines, because snacks are better when they fall.
-I got in an argument with a girlfriend inside of a tent. That's a bad place for an argument, because I tried to walk out, and had to slam the flap.
-Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier than helping someone move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load sh!t into a truck.
-I got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.
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