THE Best Case of Revenge Ever

[Inferno0032]

Inspired by:
Text
My friend's parent works as some sort of specialized nurse in a hospital.

Anyway, she was telling us a story about a guy who came in one evening. His wife had discovered he was cheating on her, but he had no idea she knew. So that night, she tells him to lay down on the bed so she could tie him up. You know, he's thinking he is about to get lucky, but there's a surprise in store. She gets him all tied up, and she leaves briefly to "get ready". Ready for the paraprosdokian?...

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

 

[GagHalfrunt]

Fake.

 

[Nitemare]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lorena_Bobbitt

 

[Sqube]

Originally posted by: Inferno0032
Inspired by:
Text
My friend's parent works as some sort of specialized nurse in a hospital.

Anyway, she was telling us a story about a guy who came in one evening. His wife had discovered he was cheating on her, but he had no idea she knew. So that night, she tells him to lay down on the bed so she could tie him up. You know, he's thinking he is about to get lucky, but there's a surprise in store. She gets him all tied up, and she leaves briefly to "get ready". Ready for the paraprosdokian?...

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

I'm assuming you mean fairly severe internal damage, right? It's certainl revenge, but (a) it's not the best and (b) it's all out of proportion to what he did. Emotional damage is always better than physical damage anyways.

 

[Skipholiday]

Pics or ban

 

[mooglemania85]

Originally posted by: SKipholiday
Pics or ban

pic

 

[OdiN]

Hopefully she is arrested and thrown in jail for a few years.

 

[Inferno0032]

Originally posted by: OdiN
Hopefully she is arrested and thrown in jail for a few years.

Haha, no idea on the legal part, but I would guess so Not sure what degree assault that would be, but enough for some decent jailtime.

We've heard some other pretty crazy and just completely strange events/patients who come in there.

 

[Inferno0032]

Originally posted by: Sqube

Originally posted by: Inferno0032
Inspired by:
Text
My friend's parent works as some sort of specialized nurse in a hospital.

Anyway, she was telling us a story about a guy who came in one evening. His wife had discovered he was cheating on her, but he had no idea she knew. So that night, she tells him to lay down on the bed so she could tie him up. You know, he's thinking he is about to get lucky, but there's a surprise in store. She gets him all tied up, and she leaves briefly to "get ready". Ready for the paraprosdokian?...

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

I'm assuming you mean fairly severe internal damage, right?

And yes, a litote, an understatement for intensification So i did mean bad internal damage.

 

[SampSon]

Sounds like someone is trying to proliferate an urban myth.

Gee look, I found it. :roll:

 

[Rubycon]

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

That's wrong - the real trick is to have it cold when inserted so nothing seems wrong. Then plug it in and leave.

 

[destrekor]

Originally posted by: Rubycon

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

That's wrong - the real trick is to have it cold when inserted so nothing seems wrong. Then plug it in and leave.

damn you are cold.

 

[Inferno0032]

Originally posted by: SampSon
Sounds like someone is trying to proliferate an urban myth.

Gee look, I found it. :roll:

Maybe the inspiration for this particular case?

 

[waggy]

Originally posted by: Rubycon

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

That's wrong - the real trick is to have it cold when inserted so nothing seems wrong. Then plug it in and leave.

having somethign shoved into my ass would let me know something is wrong..

 

[SampSon]

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

Originally posted by: SampSon
Sounds like someone is trying to proliferate an urban myth.

Gee look, I found it. :roll:

Maybe the inspiration for this particular case?

Or mabey you, and everyone involved in this story, is full of shit.

I can't count how many times someone has received an email with some ridiculous urban myth, then passed it off as their own story that they heard from a first hand witness. Of course this story always comes from their sisters friend, or a friend of a friend, or a coworkers second cousin twice removed.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it's you that is full of shit. The story you told matches almost exactly to the urban myth and you claim you heard it from your friend, who has parents who are some "specialized nurse" in a hospital.

Really, if you're going to post something believeable at least first make sure it isn't on snopes first.

 

[Syringer]

Originally posted by: SampSon

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

Originally posted by: SampSon
Sounds like someone is trying to proliferate an urban myth.

Gee look, I found it. :roll:

Maybe the inspiration for this particular case?

Or mabey you, and everyone involved in this story, is full of shit.

I can't count how many times someone has received an email with some ridiculous urban myth, then passed it off as their own story that they heard from a first hand witness. Of course this story always comes from their sisters friend, or a friend of a friend, or a coworkers second cousin twice removed.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it's you that is full of shit. The story you told matches almost exactly to the urban myth and you claim you heard it from your friend, who has parents who are some "specialized nurse" in a hospital.

Really, if you're going to post something believeable at least first make sure it isn't on snopes first.

I bet you're real fun at parties.

I can see a guy telling a story, everyone laughs and enjoys it, then Sampson guys "wait wait anyone have a computer? I need to go Snope it".

 

[SampSon]

Originally posted by: Syringer
I bet you're real fun at parties.

I can see a guy telling a story, everyone laughs and enjoys it, then Sampson guys "wait wait anyone have a computer? I need to go Snope it".

Oh man you totally nailed it. Comparing posts on a forum with conversations in real life, truely profound. I suppose as I approach 30 the few "parties" I go to aren't really tainted with tools who tell contrived stories to drunk meatheads just to get a laugh and feel accepted. I don't think I have even used the term "party" to describe a get together unless it was an annual event on a holiday.

I can see you telling a story about how you almost got in on with this hot chick and then the story abruptly ends there. Everyone stares at you waiting for the conclusion or a punch line, but it never comes. A deafening silence fills the room, then a faint cough can be heard from across the room, someone mutters "uh.. ok then.." and the party goes on with you standing there picking your ass. You quickly attempt to explain to the few people still standing around you about how the story was a joke on this internet forum and how it was really funny at the time... dejected and mumbling how you "had to be there".

When the pinnacle of social interaction can be attributed to being at a "party", you really know that you've reached the height of puberty.

 

[mooglemania85]

Originally posted by: waggy

Originally posted by: Rubycon

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

That's wrong - the real trick is to have it cold when inserted so nothing seems wrong. Then plug it in and leave.

having somethign shoved into my ass would let me know something is wrong..

You mean, "how can something so wrong feel so right?"

 

[Inferno0032]

Originally posted by: SampSon

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

Originally posted by: SampSon
Sounds like someone is trying to proliferate an urban myth.

Gee look, I found it. :roll:

Maybe the inspiration for this particular case?

Or mabey you, and everyone involved in this story, is full of shit.

I can't count how many times someone has received an email with some ridiculous urban myth, then passed it off as their own story that they heard from a first hand witness. Of course this story always comes from their sisters friend, or a friend of a friend, or a coworkers second cousin twice removed.

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it's you that is full of shit. The story you told matches almost exactly to the urban myth and you claim you heard it from your friend, who has parents who are some "specialized nurse" in a hospital.

Really, if you're going to post something believeable at least first make sure it isn't on snopes first.

Believe what you like, i didn't come here to try to "wow" people with my impressive stories, just what she told me. Maybe she heard it around the hospital, i dont know, i didn't think to ask at the time. I won't even try to convince you as it would be far more trouble than its worth to "prove" myself to one person.

 

[kt]

Originally posted by: Inferno0032

Originally posted by: Sqube

Originally posted by: Inferno0032
Inspired by:
Text
My friend's parent works as some sort of specialized nurse in a hospital.

Anyway, she was telling us a story about a guy who came in one evening. His wife had discovered he was cheating on her, but he had no idea she knew. So that night, she tells him to lay down on the bed so she could tie him up. You know, he's thinking he is about to get lucky, but there's a surprise in store. She gets him all tied up, and she leaves briefly to "get ready". Ready for the paraprosdokian?...

She comes back with a piping hot curling iron.... and she shoves it in his ass. And as if that weren't bad enough, she leaves.... without removing it first. It takes him quite awhile to free himself, remove the iron, and call 911, and it's pretty obvious that at about that time, he'd have a pretty burned bum

I'm assuming you mean fairly severe internal damage, right?

And yes, a litote, an understatement for intensification So i did mean bad internal damage.

ouch, just imagine the pain he endures from taking a crap while the wound is healing.

 

[Rubycon]

Originally posted by: destrekor

damn you are cold.

You're right...real revenge needs a real tool. :laugh:

A curling iron doesn't get nearly hot enough.

 

[Syringer]

Originally posted by: SampSon

Originally posted by: Syringer
I bet you're real fun at parties.

I can see a guy telling a story, everyone laughs and enjoys it, then Sampson guys "wait wait anyone have a computer? I need to go Snope it".

Oh man you totally nailed it. Comparing posts on a forum with conversations in real life, truely profound. I suppose as I approach 30 the few "parties" I go to aren't really tainted with tools who tell contrived stories to drunk meatheads just to get a laugh and feel accepted. I don't think I have even used the term "party" to describe a get together unless it was an annual event on a holiday.

I can see you telling a story about how you almost got in on with this hot chick and then the story abruptly ends there. Everyone stares at you waiting for the conclusion or a punch line, but it never comes. A deafening silence fills the room, then a faint cough can be heard from across the room, someone mutters "uh.. ok then.." and the party goes on with you standing there picking your ass. You quickly attempt to explain to the few people still standing around you about how the story was a joke on this internet forum and how it was really funny at the time... dejected and mumbling how you "had to be there".

When the pinnacle of social interaction can be attributed to being at a "party", you really know that you've reached the height of puberty.

Hey want to go to a party next weekend?

 

[SampSon]

Originally posted by: Inferno0032
Believe what you like, i didn't come here to try to "wow" people with my impressive stories, just what she told me. Maybe she heard it around the hospital, i dont know, i didn't think to ask at the time. I won't even try to convince you as it would be far more trouble than its worth to "prove" myself to one person.

I don't have time for you right now. I received an email from my friend saying that microsoft will pay me $245 for each person I forward that email to!

You should ask your friend's parent how many deaths they have due to the janitors unplugging life-support machines in order to run their floor polishers. I hear thats a huge problem in south africa.
I'm not sure if you're a fan of taco bell, but I'd watch out for cockroaches in their food that might lay eggs in in saliva glands.

Since you know some people involved in the medical field, could you ask them why during John Wayne's autopsy they found 40lbs of impacted fecal matter? 40 POUNDS!?!?! That's insane!

The point is that the story is an urban myth, no matter who you heard it from. The best part about urban myths is that they appear believeable and prey on the naive and easily pursuaded. I'm just letting you know that the story is BS.

Originally posted by: Syringer
Hey want to go to a party next weekend?

Yea totally, I'm in!. I love hanging out with popped collar douche bags who drink out of red plastic cups and play asshole all night.
I bet there is will be some totally wicked E and weed there too! We can get high and one up each other with war stories of drinking and puking. Man I'm pumped! I never thought I'd get invited to party with the college hipster crowd. I'll make sure to wear my classic chuck taylors and hemp necklaces.

 

[pclstyle]

Originally posted by: SampSon

Originally posted by: Syringer
Hey want to go to a party next weekend?

Yea totally, I'm in!. I love hanging out with popped collar douche bags who drink out of red plastic cups and play asshole all night.
I bet there is will be some totally wicked E and weed there too! We can get high and one up each other with war stories of drinking and puking. Man I'm pumped! I never thought I'd get invited to party with the college hipster crowd. I'll make sure to wear my classic chuck taylors and hemp necklaces.

never gave partying another shot after college, huh?

 

[SampSon]

Originally posted by: pclstyle

Originally posted by: SampSon

Originally posted by: Syringer
Hey want to go to a party next weekend?

Yea totally, I'm in!. I love hanging out with popped collar douche bags who drink out of red plastic cups and play asshole all night.
I bet there is will be some totally wicked E and weed there too! We can get high and one up each other with war stories of drinking and puking. Man I'm pumped! I never thought I'd get invited to party with the college hipster crowd. I'll make sure to wear my classic chuck taylors and hemp necklaces.

never gave partying another shot after college, huh?

The hardest partying came after college.