The 20 Worst Holiday Gifts for Kids

[Exterous]

Just shows that my parents were in it for the life insurance money. Who gives a 7 year old lawn darts?

People who realize they made a terrible terrible mistake

 

[Golgatha]

Unless of course you turn on the parental controls...

http://en-americas-support.nintendo...sion/L3RpbWUvMTM4NjA1MTA2NS9zaWQvVk1sX1NTR2w=

Thank you! It's called parenting. I also don't hand my smart phone over to my kiddo without putting it into "kid" mode first either. It's amazing to me that most of my friends don't have a password or pin to unlock their phone either. Unamazingly, those tend to be the kids who just grab the phone and play whatever they want whenever they feel like it.

 

[Oyeve]

The only dangerous thing about lego is stepping on those bitches! Or kneeing one. Hell, I still have nightmares!

 

[irishScott]

Avoid buying a kid legos because they're violent... seriously?

Fact: If you give a little boy a toy, he will find a way to do something violent with it. 99% of the time this is completely pretend and is as harmless as an episode of power rangers.

If you're buying a kid presents and you know a kid likes a certain violent cartoon, buy him the fucking action figures. If he likes legos, buy him legos. Or buy him a bunch of green army men and let him have make-believe battles fighting off the Nazi Aliens in his room.


Above all, kindly remember that your kid is a kid and stop treating everything like the psychological study of the century. Sheesh, no offense Waggy but following this guide I couldn't even buy a kid Math Blaster. This is Christmas, not summer camp.

 

[Tweak155]

I wasn't expecting a serious list.

 

[TheUnk]

I had to stop reading when she said not to buy DVDs for your kids.

 

[rh71]

Our kids' grandparents wanted to buy them an ipad mini and after seeing how oblivious they are to their surroundings while playing our ipad we said no. Screen time is bad even if it doesn't affect their eyes. We have been scratching our heads as to what they should receive (other than more Hot Wheels, or Legos they aren't into) and we could only come up with board games & card games (Uno). They seem to like them so far and it's cognitively engaging plus it's family time. Now if only we can get one of them to stop crying when he loses a turn.

 

[Sonikku]

Any guide that advises against the purchase of Lego is a bad guide.

 

[highland145]

People who realize they made a terrible terrible mistake

:biggrin:

Yes.

 

[pontifex]

Any guide that advises against the purchase of Lego is a bad guide.

I'm not sure what she advises on legos...in 1 # shes says don't buy but in another # she says do buy...

 

[dank69]

Governor Scott Walker has come up with a new #1:
Skip toys and send the money to him

 

[Imported]

Not having kids, but I do have to buy my nephews and cousins presents.. this guide sucks.

The alternative: Plan an outing or special day with a child. Draw a picture of your plans and wrap it up

Worst gift ever. Like the kid will even remember that in 10 years.

 

[Spungo]

http://childrensmd.org/browse-by-age-group/toddler-pre-school/20-worst-holiday-gifts-kids/

I don't mean to be a hater but this person's kids are seriously f***ed. They will grow up in a repressed environment, they will run away by age 15, they will be pregnant by age 19.

1) Tablets or iPhones for babies and toddlers:
.....
3)...
The alternative: Noisy things that help the brain grow—musical instruments, a digital music player such as an iPod, children’s music.

Buy an ipod but don't buy an ipod. Yes.

2) So really, all these toys do is get your kids hooked on another time-wasting website or app.

Because learning how to use a computer and internet will never help you get a job or anything.

The alternative: Plan an outing or special day with a child. Draw a picture of your plans and wrap it up.

"sorry but I drank all our christmas money. there will be no christmas."

4) Toys that provide uncensored internet access: One of the saddest patients I ever saw in my emergency room was a teen who had started meeting adult men online and sneaking out with them. Her mother cried and told me how she had bought her daughter a Nintendo DS, through which her daughter had uncensored internet access. She had limited her daughter’s computer use

A teen with parents who obviously don't love her seeks attention from older men? I blame Nintendo.

The alternative: Child-safe email programs (there are many options available online), creative computer software for kids that teach programming or web development such as Lego education modules, e-books, an old digital camera and photo editing software, an old iTouch or inactive iphone with the internet disabled for use as a calendar/alarm clock/music player/camera.

Fucking internet. I don't want my child learning about shit like evolution or sexual education. I had my kids after having unprotected sex at age 13 and I want my kids to continue my legacy.

5) PG-13 Movies: Did you know that PG-13 movies now have more gun violence than R-rated movies? New research in the medical journal Pediatrics looked at the top 30 grossing films annually since 1950. They found that gun violence in movies has more than doubled since 1950. Gun violence in PG-13 movies has tripled since the rating was created in 1985, and gun violence is now more common in PG-13 films than those rated R. Dr. Wendy Sue Swanson has written an excellent summary of this issue.

Probably because America is run by retards. PG-13 = extreme violence. R = a thought provoking film where you see a few boobs (American Beauty).

Instead, pick toys that promote healthy habits such as exercise

I'm sure that kid will have lots of friends. Let's go to my place after school and have unprotected sex! Actually that would be popular, and it promotes exercise, and it's not violent, and it involves no internet.

7) Violent toys: Violent video games, especially those that involve shooting, have been shown to increase aggression in children.

This is simply wrong. The #1 determining factor of whether or not a boy will be violent is whether or not they live with their father. Boys with no father are much more violent. Girls with no father tend to be more sexual.

The alternative: Pay a child’s sports fees or buy the uniforms and equipment they need to play.

Buy a fridge and give the box to the kid?

Even classic games like Memory and Connect 4 now come marketed with characters I don’t want my kids to love.

Because diversity is weakness. Anyone who is different from ideal must be shunned.

The alternative: Bikes, scooters, and roller skates still make great gifts, but avoid the ER (and your $200+ co-pay) by buying the safety gear that goes with them. Bikes and scooters should come with helmets, and roller skates with knee, elbow and hand protectors.

This might protect your body, but it won't protect your self esteem when the other kids call you gay for wearing elbow pads when riding a bike.

The alternative: Buy a zoo or botanical garden membership. Plan a few dates to go together.

That almost sounds as fun as bible study!

15) Messy stuff: markers that are not washable, paint, play dough, moon sand, or any kit that comes with glitter.

Anyone who is not aware that acetone or just regular vodka dissolves permanent marker is an unfit parent. It's a fact.

17) Sexualized dolls: Moms overwhelmingly dislike “Bratz” and other dolls with skimpy clothes and too much makeup. Somehow girls are drawn to them. Is this the style you want your daughter to adopt?

What was that thing I just said about having no father?

The alternative: Stick with a few classic dolls with interchangeable clothes and accessories.

Barbie/Ken transsexual with detachable penis.

 

[marvdmartian]

Funny, they mention PG-13 movies. I once heard the only difference between the ratings is that you can only use the F-word ONCE in a PG-13 movie. Use it a second time, it's an automatic R rating.

Now I understand, having grown up myself, that most kids know that word by the age of 13.....but I also know that there's plenty of kids younger than 13 who go to see PG-13 movies, and I'd rather they NOT hear that in a movie!

 

[Spungo]

Funny, they mention PG-13 movies. I once heard the only difference between the ratings is that you can only use the F-word ONCE in a PG-13 movie. Use it a second time, it's an automatic R rating.

Back in my day the R meant you saw the film when your parents Rented it from the store. How did every elementary kid know who robocop was? Why did they have robocop action figures for a movie that was rated X? Kids saw that movie somehow.