Testicle Stroking Agency: Had your balls cupped yet?

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werepossum

Elite Member
Jul 10, 2006
29,873
463
126
Don't want TSA agents getting to third base with your wife and/or daughter, but don't want them on the TSA Christmas Party highlights reel either? There's a simple answer: Werepossum's Traveling Burkhas! With one of these babies and a bit of attitude your loved ones will be immune to humiliating scans and groping! Order now and get a free fake Quran hiding travel-sized mouth wash, tooth paste, and two wee bottles of bourbon.
 

her209

No Lifer
Oct 11, 2000
56,336
11
0
77257931.jpg
Trekkers should be impressed.
 

BW86

Lifer
Jul 20, 2004
13,114
30
91
ITT: A whole lotta insecure people.

I've done pat-downs. Guess what? Your balls are nothin' special. And they get paid no mind, either.
If you've lost your keys in the couch and you've got your hands down in there fishing for them... are you paying any attention to what the cushions feel like? No, you're looking for keys, not couch. so your brain does you a favor and filters out the background noise.
Same goes when you're patting someone down. You're feeling for things that should not be there -- lumps, hard edges. The feel of clothing and fleshy bits is filtered out.
There's no similarity whatsoever to sexual groping.

So don't be such pansies about it.

......o_O
 

Pulsar

Diamond Member
Mar 3, 2003
5,224
306
126
TSA says children 12 and under get a pass. But searching kids ridiculous to begin with at any age.

Ahahahahahaha. Just more proof of how idiotic the TSA and their supporters are. How many kids blew themselves up in vietnam with hand grenades just to take a couple of us with them? Yeah, let's exempt them...... great idea TSA!
 

IceBergSLiM

Lifer
Jul 11, 2000
29,932
3
81
Ahahahahahaha. Just more proof of how idiotic the TSA and their supporters are. How many kids blew themselves up in vietnam with hand grenades just to take a couple of us with them? Yeah, let's exempt them...... great idea TSA!

How many cases of terrorist children have there been? :awe:
 

Ns1

No Lifer
Jun 17, 2001
55,420
1,600
126
wow, they actually CAN file a civil suit against you for leaving

Michael J. Aguilar, chief of the TSA office in San Diego, called a news conference at the airport Monday afternoon to announce the probe. He said the investigation could lead to prosecution and civil penalties of up to $11,000.

TSA agents had told Tyner on Saturday that he could be fined up to $10,000.

According to Aguilar, Tyner is under investigation for leaving the security area without permission. That’s prohibited, among other reasons, to prevent potential terrorists from entering security, gaining information, and leaving.


Also found out this is not touching you ABOVE your underwear, but BELOW ie on skin.
 

GoPackGo

Diamond Member
Oct 10, 2003
6,521
600
126
wow, they actually CAN file a civil suit against you for leaving

Michael J. Aguilar, chief of the TSA office in San Diego, called a news conference at the airport Monday afternoon to announce the probe. He said the investigation could lead to prosecution and civil penalties of up to $11,000.

TSA agents had told Tyner on Saturday that he could be fined up to $10,000.

According to Aguilar, Tyner is under investigation for leaving the security area without permission. That’s prohibited, among other reasons, to prevent potential terrorists from entering security, gaining information, and leaving.


Also found out this is not touching you ABOVE your underwear, but BELOW ie on skin.

Everyone is a terrorist now...
 

drebo

Diamond Member
Feb 24, 2006
7,034
1
81
The terrorists have won.

Actually...the terrorists probably don't actually exist. The federal government is just making it up as an excuse to take our rights and liberties and trust us further into tyranny.
 

IceBergSLiM

Lifer
Jul 11, 2000
29,932
3
81
Ok, drudge has a little more credibility than Alex Jones, but :hmm: .

infowars.com has been a link on the front page of drudge for months now. They are pretty much as credible as any other source these days. they consistently break alot of stories on drudge.
 

CycloWizard

Lifer
Sep 10, 2001
12,348
1
81
wow, they actually CAN file a civil suit against you for leaving

Michael J. Aguilar, chief of the TSA office in San Diego, called a news conference at the airport Monday afternoon to announce the probe. He said the investigation could lead to prosecution and civil penalties of up to $11,000.

TSA agents had told Tyner on Saturday that he could be fined up to $10,000.

According to Aguilar, Tyner is under investigation for leaving the security area without permission. That’s prohibited, among other reasons, to prevent potential terrorists from entering security, gaining information, and leaving.


Also found out this is not touching you ABOVE your underwear, but BELOW ie on skin.
You are a serf, requiring the permission of your betters to leave. Welcome to the new, improved land of the free.
 

Pardus

Diamond Member
Jun 29, 2000
8,197
21
81
I have to fly the day before thanksgiving, and will not go though the full body scanners. if you visit the tsa website, it says the scanners have the option to store images but it is turned off by default. The website says 90% of Americans prefer the scanner over a full body search, it also said the study was done by USA Today, which means it total b.s.

Like other's said, the terrorists have won, they wanted to make our lives a living hell when flying and they have accomplished just that.

It amazes me that airlines charge $30 or more to check a bag, and the price of tickets and parking is still high.

You can check if your on the no-fly-list before getting to the airport.
 

pcgeek11

Lifer
Jun 12, 2005
22,391
5,004
136
The whole body scanners safety is questionable but lets pretend they are safe. The privacy issues are very real though. When a child walks through the scanner the TSA has in their possession child pornography by the definition of the law. This is the same law that has been used to harass grandmothers taking pictures of their grandkids and kids taking pictures of themselves. Then you have the entire "trust" issue that you or your wife's or childs naked picture won't end up on the internet. Do you really trust some $12/hour flunky that much? Remember the story about the TSA agent going nuts because other TSA agents teased him about his small pecker after being "scanned"?

It is stupid to say this is porn. They do not save the pictures or put them on the internet. If you have a link... post it.

Furthermore, you obviously don't know what the new "enhanced pat downs" are if you refuse to be electronically strip searched and subjected to radiation that may or may not be harmful to your health in minor ways, like cancer.

I worked in the nuclear field 20 years and you will get far far more radiation from a few hours at the beach in the summer.


I suggest you read up on it because it isn't the simply "wanding" that you are used to. The "enhanced pat down" is the equivilant of a custody search by the police which they are only allowed to do AFTER they have arrested you. This is not the simply pat down they are allowed to do BEFORE you are arrested for a crime.

They feel your legs up to the upper thigh ( yes I know this is in the groin area ). Big deal. They do not proceed any further unless they find something.

If he is a "perverted doctor" then you are damned skippy. If they decide to start sticking stuff up your ass are you going to say "well are you going to be mad at the doctor doing your colonoscipy"? A doctor doing a medical procedure and TSA investigating people who have done absolutely nothing wrong, well beyond what a police officer is allowed to do in similar situations, is not a valid comparison.

How many bombs have the TSA found? You willing to submit you and your family to similar searches everytime you leave your house just to protect you and yours from an insanely unlikely event? What about the luggage that they haven't been checking for the last few years? Wouldn't you think that would be a better and easier way to get a bomb on board to blow you and your family to itsy bitsy pieces? What about the fact that they can still shove enough explosives up their ass to blow you and your family to bits on that plane, are you really ok with the TSA sticking something up your ass, your wifes ass, and your kids ass to ensure you are safe enough to fly? Or that little fact that now that your family and a thousand other people are all in one small area waiting to be screened the terrorists will get a much larger body count detonating a bomb in the security line?

You seem to be really preoccupied with having something shoved up your ass. Hmmm do you live in San Francisco by chance? Seriously though. Not to disappoint you, but they are not going to shove anything up your ass. Even if they find something.


I am not the one that is paranoid. The idiots that think these measures are required to protect them from something that is extremely unlikely (I would bet lightning is higher statistically) AND believe that they make them safer are the paranoid ones. I simply refuse to allow some $12 an hour flunky to grope my child and I am the paranoid one? Really?

How safe has the TSA really made you and why do you fear flying so much that you are willing to be strip searched everytime you fly? I am not the paranoid one.

Yes; really you are. Paranoid about some TSA Agent getting the hots to touch your junk.... trust me he doesn't want you. I am not afraid of flying, nor am I afraid of a TSA Agent... Yes you are the paranoid one. Are you afraid that you will pop a boner?

Paranoid = Paranoia is a thought process heavily influenced by anxiety or fear, often to the point of irrationality and delusion. Paranoid thinking typically includes persecutory beliefs concerning a perceived threat towards oneself.

This describes you to perfectly. I know planes have been blown up. How much evidence do you have of TSA Agents sexually molesting people, sticking things up peoples asses, posting scanned pictures on the internet, and scanner radiation causing medical problems.

OK. Now who is paranoid?

For most places that I travel it is actually quicker to drive now than to fly, mostly due to the bullshit security that doesn't make you anymore safer. Enjoy the strip searches and watching some highschool dropout feel up your wife.

This is good because I think your driving is going to increase. Enjoy your paranoid delusions and the Doctor (OBGYN) feeling up your wife. :)
 
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Ns1

No Lifer
Jun 17, 2001
55,420
1,600
126
I
They feel your legs up to the upper thigh ( yes I know this is in the groin area ). Big deal. They do not proceed any further unless they find something.

that doesn't seem to be the case.

Speaking with The Alex Jones Show today (video coming soon), Stone went further – noting how the TSA thug directly patted down his testicles, penis and backside while his hand was inside Stone’s pants. Stone was initially embarrassed to reveal the full scope of the groping but related the details of what amounted to nothing less than outright sexual molestation.
...
“I was wearing shorts at the time – between the underwear, right on the skin, all the way around the back, all the way around my front, 360 degrees, touched inappropriately,” he said.

http://www.prisonplanet.com/tsa-now-putting-hands-down-fliers-pants.html
 

pcgeek11

Lifer
Jun 12, 2005
22,391
5,004
136
that doesn't seem to be the case.

Speaking with The Alex Jones Show today (video coming soon), Stone went further – noting how the TSA thug directly patted down his testicles, penis and backside while his hand was inside Stone’s pants. Stone was initially embarrassed to reveal the full scope of the groping but related the details of what amounted to nothing less than outright sexual molestation.
...
“I was wearing shorts at the time – between the underwear, right on the skin, all the way around the back, all the way around my front, 360 degrees, touched inappropriately,” he said.

http://www.prisonplanet.com/tsa-now-putting-hands-down-fliers-pants.html

Just because some dude said it it makes it true? Hell I didn't know that.

Prison Planet link. Really!

Alex Jones is a phoney self serving POS.

http://opposingdigits.com/alex/
 

DominionSeraph

Diamond Member
Jul 22, 2009
8,386
32
91
Yes, the 9/11 hijackers used tools that were not prohibited at the time. It was perfectly legal to carry a boxcutter into the secure area of an airport and onto a plane. Whats your point? That is no longer legal and the old Xray and metal detectors are pretty good at finding them.

So, the government reacted to a terrorist vector, which is a thing you bitch about in this very post.

Try being consistent.

Reinforced and locked cockpit doors. So how are you going to get into the cockpit with pre-9/11 type security with the addition that blades are illegal as well. Sure you might be able to get a small blade on a plane but with a locked and reinforced cockpit the passengers will not allow you more than a minute or two to try and gain access. This has been proven on 9/11 and with incidents after.

Oh, I'd just blow the plane up. Because your methods don't stop me from getting on the plane with dynamite strapped to my chest.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/3095592.stm

Every piece huh? You would think they would pick up a friging person in a box, maybe they weren't using the new and improved X-ray scanners? This is a post 9/11 incident. A quick google search shows that luggage screening has been an ongoing issue and often "less effective" methods of bomb scanning must be used because the system was overburdened. So while you where frisking grandpa and little Susie to make sure they aren't going to try and take over/blow up the plane "less effective" methods are used to screen the luggage

Cargo != luggage.

With luggage you control which airplane it goes on. It will be on a passenger plane. No guarantee of that with cargo.

No, my criteria is terrorizing and, since we are specifically speaking about air travel, the disruption of air travel and commerce. My "plan" works insanely better than yours, took much less time to think up, involves almost no risk of being caught before they carry out the plan, is extremely easy to scale up (your limit is basically nutjobs who are willing to blow themselves up) and coordinate (push the button at 11am eastern) and could potentially shut down every hub in the US for an unknown amount of time (if you have enough nutjobs). Since you aren't trying to sneak anything into the secure area the devices can be made much better and more reliable than the shoe/underwear bombers used.

You don't seem to understand human responses very well, for that would be a shit terrorist attack.
You do not give your target a semblance of control. To only attack airports leaves them direct counters: To beef up security, alter traffic flow, and to risk assess air travel.
Recovery is pathetically easy.

How does Israel handle their airport security and how effective has it been? They are arguably a much greater target than we are so it should be a very good comparison.

http://yglesias.thinkprogress.org/2010/11/israeli-airport-security/

One thing you hear all the time is that Israeli airport security is both more rigorous than American and also somehow less intrusive. The most recent version of that is making the rounds today.

I don’t want to generalize too much from a single trip through Ben Gurion Airport, but I’d have to say that my experience leaving Tel Aviv was far and away the most unpleasant encounter I’d ever had with airport security officials in the decade. Moscow in 1998 was worse. As best I could tell, things went pretty smoothly as long as you were (a) Israeli, (b) traveling with an Israeli, or (c) traveling with some kind of well-established tour group. I think this may be how the majority of people go through the airport, which may account for its good reputation. But it took me approximately three hours to get from the initial passport check through to the food court. I was told that I couldn’t take my iPad onto the plane, and therefore would have to check a whole bag that I’d been planning to carry on so that the bag could contain the forbidden device, and the same thing happened to two of the guys I was traveling with. Each individual item from the bad I was allowed to carry on had to be separately wiped down for traces of explosive residue and several items had to be wiped multiple times.

I was groped a couple of times, yelled at by surly Russian immigrants, accused of “lying” because I’d forgotten I had a second iPod charging cord in my bag, interrogated several times about who I’d talked to, etc.

What is true is that except for the Russian immigrants, who do bring the unique Russian approach to customer service, everyone is exceedingly polite. That said, the process took three hours! What’s more, unlike with American security I actually felt somewhat threatened the whole time, like they might just decide I was too left-wing and destroy my laptop. Fortunately, I’d been warned this would likely happen and was delivered to the airport four hours before takeoff. But if you had to arrive four hours before your Atlanta-Boston flight’s scheduled departure, then you’d vitiate the entire utility of air travel. I think the most sensible approach to airport security would be to simply accept a slightly higher risk that someone, somewhere might blow up a plane. Right now in the United States flying somewhere is orders of magnitude safer than driving their in a car. But it’s become a huge pain in the ass. Reducing the “pain in the ass” factor would be a good idea.
 

Darwin333

Lifer
Dec 11, 2006
19,946
2,330
126
It is stupid to say this is porn. They do not save the pictures or put them on the internet. If you have a link... post it.

Give it time but so far we have actual stories of a TSA agent himself going nutjob on fellow TSA agents because they were fucking with him after he went through the scanner.

Gizmodo posted a story on a hundred or so leaked images from a similar device (but much less resolution as I understand) that was used in a courthouse. Lets take a poll and see if people think the TSA is more or less competent than the people scanning you at courthouses.

Besides, they just went into use so give it some time. Remember how they weren't even supposed to have the ability to store images? Oh now they do but it is turned off, ok....

I worked in the nuclear field 20 years and you will get far far more radiation from a few hours at the beach in the summer.

You will forgive me if I take a medical doctors opinion over yours or the TSAs.


They feel your legs up to the upper thigh ( yes I know this is in the groin area ). Big deal. They do not proceed any further unless they find something.

Oh really? Again, they just implemented these policies and already we have fucked up stories like:

"“I have to go in your waistband, I have to put my hand down your pants,” after which he did precisely that."

or how about

"Owen JJ Stone appeared on The Alex Jones Show today to discuss the incident and how the TSA goon ‘touched his junk’ by specifically patting his backside and testicles while his hand was inside Stone’s pants – video of the interview coming soon."

http://www.prisonplanet.com/tsa-now-putting-hands-down-fliers-pants.html

Or how about the father that, in his own words, watched the TSA molest his 6 year old child?

Aren't we in the first week or so of these policies being implemented on a wide scale?

You seem to be really preoccupied with having something shoved up your ass. Hmmm do you live in San Francisco by chance? Seriously though. Not to disappoint you, but they are not going to shove anything up your ass. Even if they find something.

That is the next logical step though isn't it? If someone wants to blow the plane up, along with themselves, they probably won't mind sticking a bomb up their ass where the scanner won't see it. So what happens when a plane gets blown up using that method?

And no, I am preoccupied with not giving up my rights to an agency of high school dropouts with a success rate of zero. Perhaps you have a link of the TSA stopping a terrorist in security? I have asked many times and have yet to receive a thing.


Yes; really you are. Paranoid about some TSA Agent getting the hots to touch your junk.... trust me he doesn't want you. I am not afraid of flying, nor am I afraid of a TSA Agent... Yes you are the paranoid one. Are you afraid that you will pop a boner?

Paranoid = Paranoia is a thought process heavily influenced by anxiety or fear, often to the point of irrationality and delusion. Paranoid thinking typically includes persecutory beliefs concerning a perceived threat towards oneself.

This describes you to perfectly. I know planes have been blown up. How much evidence do you have of TSA Agents sexually molesting people, sticking things up peoples asses, posting scanned pictures on the internet, and scanner radiation causing medical problems.

OK. Now who is paranoid?

You can't be that retarded can you? I am not the one that is so scared of the ebul terrorists, who have killed a whopping 4,000 people in the US over the last 10 years, that I am willing to consent to that sort of bullshit just to get on a plane. I don't fear the TSA, I simply refuse to willingly allow myself or my family to be subjected to that sort of bullshit.

On the other hand, you DO fear the ebul terrorists enough to allow yourself to be subjected to that sort of bullshit while not being one bit safer. That would be the "thought process heavily influenced by anxiety or fear, often to the point of irrationality" part of the definition you posted. I know that I have a much greater chance of dying doing almost any other activity than by a terrorist on a plane. I also know that it is very easy to prevent another 9/11 type attack (planes as missiles) from happening and none of it involves this shit the TSA is doing, so again we are down to them just killing the people on the plane. They can kill just as many people, and often more, in many other non-secure places including the line you wait in to get fucked with by the TSA.

No my friend, I am the rational one that says that is a bunch of bullshit and does NOT make us any safer. You are the one that is saying that it is worth it for the irrational perception of increased safety from a threat that is damn near statistically non-existent.

BTW, you do know that passengers have been more effective at stopping terrorist attacks on planes than the TSA has, right? They were more effective on 9/11 and after. A reinforced locked fucking door is more effective than anything that the TSA has done since 9/11.

This is good because I think your driving is going to increase. Enjoy your paranoid delusions and the Doctor (OBGYN) feeling up your wife. :)

You really want to compare her doctor to a TSA agent? Really? A doctor compared to a $12 an hour flunky, gee how will I ever think of a retort to that brilliant argument?

Tell ya what, fire all of the current TSA agents and replace them with medical doctors and they can give us all checkups as we go through security. At least then we will get some actual benefit out of the bullshit.

Try again.
 

PottedMeat

Lifer
Apr 17, 2002
12,363
475
126
There was some article that said that the scanner manufacturers were required to have hard drives, USB, and network access. I wonder how much of these problems would be solved if the contracts required:
-watermarking of images with the supervisor/user/scanner IDs
-allowing prosecution if the images were released
-requiring authorization for moving the images

you know some TSA employee is saving these things
 

PottedMeat

Lifer
Apr 17, 2002
12,363
475
126
The feds damned well can, and have, saved and transmitted images.
http://news.cnet.com/8301-31921_3-20012583-281.html

This follows an earlier disclosure (PDF) by the TSA that it requires all airport body scanners it purchases to be able to store and transmit images for "testing, training, and evaluation purposes." The agency says, however, that those capabilities are not normally activated when the devices are installed at airports.

[ ] Post this image on your facebook page.

[ ] Twitter about this image.

[ ] Save to USB drive.