Steeplerot
Lifer
A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey.
He orders a drink and while he's drinking,
the monkey jumps all around the place. The
monkey grabs some olives off the bar and
eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes
and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool
table and grabs one of the billiard balls.
To everyone's amazement, he sticks it in
his mouth, and somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you
see what your monkey just did?"
"No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool
table... whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied
the guy, "he eats everything in sight.
Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
The guy finishes his drink, pays his bill,
pays for the stuff the monkey ate and
leaves.
Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again,
and has his monkey with him. He orders a
drink and the monkey starts running around
the bar again. While the man is finishing
his drink, the
monkey finds a maraschino
cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it
up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again
sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and
eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see
what your monkey did now?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a
peanut up his butt, pulled them out, and
ate them!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied
the guy. "He still eats everything in
sight, but ever since he had to crap out that
cue ball, he measures everything first.
Boredom, it's whats for dinner.
He orders a drink and while he's drinking,
the monkey jumps all around the place. The
monkey grabs some olives off the bar and
eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes
and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool
table and grabs one of the billiard balls.
To everyone's amazement, he sticks it in
his mouth, and somehow swallows it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you
see what your monkey just did?"
"No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool
table... whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied
the guy, "he eats everything in sight.
Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."
The guy finishes his drink, pays his bill,
pays for the stuff the monkey ate and
leaves.
Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again,
and has his monkey with him. He orders a
drink and the monkey starts running around
the bar again. While the man is finishing
his drink, the
monkey finds a maraschino
cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it
up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.
Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again
sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and
eats it.
The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see
what your monkey did now?"
"No, what?" replied the man.
"Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry and a
peanut up his butt, pulled them out, and
ate them!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied
the guy. "He still eats everything in
sight, but ever since he had to crap out that
cue ball, he measures everything first.
Boredom, it's whats for dinner.
