SMQ: It was a bit of a surprise that you chose to go to Illinois, which is a team that has historically struggled and hasn't won recently...
AB: Wait, man, say what? I'm going to play for Ron Zook at Florida, dawg.
SMQ: Wait, I thought you committed to Illinois. [Looking through notes]
AB: Naw, dawg, naw, Florida, man. National champions.
SMQ: But...you signed with Ron Zook.
AB: Yeah. Florida. Tim Tebow, baby.
SMQ: Ron Zook's the coach at Illinois.
AB: No way, he was decked out in Florida ******, we were in the Swamp. Florida cheerleaders huggin' on me with their little garters way up the thigh.
SMQ: Are you sure?
AB: They had little Florida uniforms on...but they were a little pale, come to think of it. And they did call him 'dad.' And the old one had a sweater tied around her neck. [Long pause] He's where?
SMQ: Um, Illinois. The Fighting Illini? He was decked out...he didn't mention he got fired at Florida, like, more than two years ago?
AB: The Fightin' what? Where the hell is that?
SMQ: Illinois? It's...Illinois.
AB: [silence]
SMQ: They were, um, 2-10 last year. Last place in the Big Ten.
AB: This be some bull shvt.
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