Stuff white people like.

[yllus]

Stuff White People Like

My favourites:

#75 Threatening to Move to Canada

Often times, white people get frustrated with the state of their country. They do not like the President, or Congress, or the health care system, or the illegal status of Marijuana. Whenever they are presented with a situation that seems unreasonable to them, their first instinct is to threaten to move to Canada.

For example, if you are watching TV with white people and there is a piece on the news about that they do not agree with, they are likely to declare ?ok, that?s it, I?m moving to Canada.?

Though they will never actually move to Canada, the act of declaring that they are willing to undertake the journey is very symbolic in white culture. It shows that their dedication to their lifestyle and beliefs are so strong, that they would consider packing up their entire lives and moving to a country that is only slightly similar to the one they live in now.

Within white culture, it is agreed upon that if Canada had better weather it would be a perfect place.

Being aware that this information can be used quite easily to gain the trust of white people. Whenever they say, ?I?m moving to Canada,? you must immediately respond with ?I have relatives in Canada.?

They will then expect you to tell them about how Canada has a perfect healthcare system, legalized everything, and no crime. Though not true, it will reassure them that they are making the right choice by saying they want to move there.

But be warned, they will reference you in future conversations and possibly call on you to settle disputes about Canadian tax rates. So use this advice only if you plan to do some basic research.

Note: Canadian white people threaten to move to Europe.

Note: Europeans are unable to threaten to move anywhere.

#4 Assists

When you say the word ?assist,? first thing you think about is Steve Nash and Wayne Gretzky. White people love to pass, it?s no secret.

In basketball, it?s kind of a must so that white guys can carve out a niche and guarantee acceptance on a team. Trying to be a white guy who dunks and stuff is like trying to be a white rapper - yeah, there are a few, but you have to work twice as hard for half the results.

One explanation is that white people still feel guilty over slavery, colonialism, and the crusades so passing is a way to make up for it. But more importantly, it makes them feel good to help others.

LOL @ a high number of assists to make up for slavery.

 

[newb111]

3rd repost of this in recent memory.

 

[legoman666]

RRRRRRRRRRRRRR


argggg?

 

[yllus]

White people love to point out a thread has been reposted?

 

[newb111]

Originally posted by: yllus
White people love to point out a thread has been reposted?

You have saved the thread with original material.

 

[GasX]

white people... dododooooo

 

[daveymark]

roundeye?

 

[buck]

Originally posted by: newb111
3rd repost of this in recent memory.

I was thinking 4...

 

[RaistlinZ]

Reposts should be #1 on that list.

 

[eakers]

I wish I had thought of that blog.

 

[Whoozyerdaddy]

Repost AND who the hell thinks of Gretzky as an assist guy? He was a pure scorer.

*GRETZKY SHOOTS... HE SCORES!!!*