Dear Xxxxxx,
We know you. You're the type that loves a steal! Not a bargain, but a bona fide "hurry up before they change their mind" steal. After all, wasn't it you that offered that young couple across the street 100 bucks for their fabulous dining room furniture and big screen TV while they clawed their way through divorce court? Your secret is safe.
Just like that couple, it?s Splitsville for us and the maker of these shoes. We want them out of our warehouse and out of our collective memory. Before you ask, no, there?s absolutely nothing wrong with them. We?ve sold a ton of them over the last 15 months for as much as $159 Simply put, the folks who broker the manufacturing went Psycho. Period. If we had photos, we?d burn them.
As usual, our loss is somebody?s gain. If you?ve got credit left on any of those cards, grab it fast. At $74, we?re betting these shoes will soon be just a painful memory. Yes, we know we?ve sold out of some sizes. We?re real sorry about that, but we?re not asking Norman Bates to make any more!
Don?t worry about us or the P. Bunyan brand. Like the big boys that we?re becoming, we?ll dust ourselves off and be chasing brokers again before you know it. And next time, we?ll find a better one... who?s a better dancer... and has personality.
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