So my doorbell rang at 830pm

[renz20003]

This old lady is at the door and leads off with "I'm not crazy but..."

I'm thinking oh great here we go; she continues.

"I love to trim bushes and I've seen yours is in need of some grooming. Can I come by tomorrow to trim it?

I'm not talking about pubes either, my shrub is out of control but it's also 830 and I'm having relax time.

I politely told her to get lost and don't come back. WTF

 

[rh71]

I never answer the door after dark, because only crazies come then.

 

[OutHouse]

you turned down free landscaping?

fail.

 

[shortylickens]

I never answer the door after dark, because only crazies come then.

I'll need you to apologize to my buddy Jose from Papa Johns.

 

[John Connor]

I politely told her to get lost and don't come back. WTF

You're avatar and this sentence begs of the assumption that you're an idiot.

 

[Jeeebus]

the fact you're not talking about pubes doesn't mean she wasn't. This is Olds' Rule 12: never turn down free strange old lady trim.

 

[AdamK47]

It's her way of telling you that you're doing a terrible job keeping your bushes trimmed and that you should be ashamed of yourself.

 

[rommelrommel]

You're avatar and this sentence begs of the assumption that you're an idiot.

Takes one to know one?

Your avatar.

I don't even know how to fix "begs of the assumption" since it's probably a modification of begs the question, and if it was you were still using it wrong.

 

[John Connor]

Begs of the assumption is a new phrase I created to piss you off.

 

[Jeeebus]

if we're just making shit up now, I want to be credited with "truth be tolled."

 

[Jeeebus]

also acceptable: truth be bold.

 

[Imp]

Can't wait for the home owner's association letter?

 

[John Connor]

home owner's association

What's that?

 

[FelixDeCat]

This old lady is at the door and leads off with "I'm not crazy but..."

Im not crazy but...

 

[renz20003]

Can't wait for the home owner's association letter?

I don't live in a development, no rules for me.

 

[Iron Woode]

Im not crazy but, can I convince you to change your vote in the Electoral Collage?

(that would get the door slammed in your face at my house)

of course it would get the door slammed in your face!

Electoral Collage is just a bunch of pics. If you said Electoral College then that might be different.

 

[pete6032]

Sounds like you really have it rough.

 

[Eug]

Pics of the shrub or ban!

But yeah, it probably means your neighbours think your yard looks like crap, and she drew the short straw to be the one to talk to you.

 

[GagHalfrunt]

I never answer the door after dark, because only crazies come then.

FTFY

 

[ImpulsE69]

If you didn't yell "Get off my LAWN!" you failed.

 

[snoopy7548]

How old was she? Maybe she was casing the place. If you responded with, "Well, I won't be here tomorrow..." you'd be screwed.

 

[renz20003]

How old was she? Maybe she was casing the place. If you responded with, "Well, I won't be here tomorrow..." you'd be screwed.

I'd say mid 60s but I had the same thought.

 

[BarkingGhostar]

OP is a pedophile and the old lady was in her twenties. But his yard did need some work according to her.

 

[renz20003]

OP is a pedophile and the old lady was in her twenties. But his yard did need some work according to her.

You're mom is a pedophile.

 

[highland145]

What?...Someone's Mom's needs my attention?

Front and center.

Taking over Alk's role, bitches.