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Should I....

Actually, I started this thread because I'm feelilng very insecure tonight. Nobody likes me. My dogs keep backing me into corners and trying to rip my nads off. My wife came at me with a butcher's knife but I managed to dodge her. She says that it was an accident that she cut my carotid artery and that she really wasn't trying to strangle me, she was just putting a tourniquette (whatever) on my neck in order to save my life.

I fell down the stairs after tripping over the broom handle that my lovely daughter accidentally poked through the ballisters. She swears it was an accident, even though she was standing on a step ladder at the time.

I was helping my son change the fan belts on his car when it somehow started up and took off 3 fingers on one hand and 2 on the other. After I crawled out from under the hood, which somehow malfunctioned and fell on my head, my son was very attentive. He urged me to walk up and down the alley to keep my heart pumping blood. Such a loving son.

Am I being paranoid? Perhaps that should be another poll.
 
Originally posted by: HappyPuppy
Actually, I started this thread because I'm feelilng very insecure tonight. Nobody likes me. My dogs keep backing me into corners and trying to rip my nads off. My wife came at me with a butcher's knife but I managed to dodge her. She says that it was an accident that she cut my carotid artery and that she really wasn't trying to strangle me, she was just putting a tourniquette (whatever) on my neck in order to save my life.

I fell down the stairs after tripping over the broom handle that my lovely daughter accidentally poked through the ballisters. She swears it was an accident, even though she was standing on a step ladder at the time.

I was helping my son change the fan belts on his car when it somehow started up and took off 3 fingers on one hand and 2 on the other. After I crawled out from under the hood, which somehow malfunctioned and fell on my head, my son was very attentive. He urged me to walk up and down the alley to keep my heart pumping blood. Such a loving son.

Am I being paranoid? Perhaps that should be another poll.
Click to expand...

Is it

1) Skoorb Effect
2) Worst Day EvAr

😕?

- M4H
 
Originally posted by: Ronstang
I just want to know how your son was working on his fanbelts, considering he has been arrested for selling crack.
Click to expand...


I bailed him out of jail with money I borrowed from my daughter.

 
Originally posted by: HappyPuppy
Originally posted by: Ronstang
I just want to know how your son was working on his fanbelts, considering he has been arrested for selling crack.
Click to expand...


I bailed him out of jail with money I borrowed from my daughter.
Click to expand...
But she spent all her money on procurrement!

 
i VOTED WHO THE FVCK ARE YOU... oops, sorry for yelling!
Now I'm off to find that picture of a rabbit with a pancake on his head...



:beer:😀
 
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