Dumac, I won't argue that female characters in games are designed to look the most sexually appealing to men because that is their demographic.
In a weird twist though, the men in games are designed to look the most sexually appealing to women, this makes the guys playing them desire to emulate that and become what women desire most in men.
Edit- Just reread what you wrote, to go along with the above paragraph, men are just as excluded from choice as women are. Men can't see a video game where the male character isn't the epitome of what a female finds sexually attractive.
You have to understand, women are also creating these characters in games, either the actual look, personality or lines of dialog.
It's a never ending cycle, however one that is not often vocalized by men because they accept the fact that they TRULY want to be the men in the games. Women want to be the women but are vocal about the negative aspect of it.
I hate to sound misogynistic but this is how it has always worked. Women want to be THAT woman in the game but can't/won't so they vocalize how unfair it is (this is excluding the fact that the game models are infact not real).
Sorry, rambled a bit there.