Secret of a happy marriage (Another stolen Brutuskend JOKE)

Brutuskend

Lifer
Apr 2, 2001
26,558
4
0
There was once a man and woman who had been married for more than 60 years.
They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had kept no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

For all of these years, he had never thought about the box, but one day, the little old woman got very sick and the doctor said she would not recover. In trying to sort out their affairs, the little old man took down the shoe box and took it to his wife's bedside. She agreed that it was time that he should know what was in the box.

When he opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money totaling $25,000. He asked her about the contents. "When we were to be married," she said,"My grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you I should just keep quiet and crochet a doily."
The little old man was so moved, he had to fight back tears. Only two precious doilies were in the box. She had only been angry with him two times in all those years of living and loving. He almost burst with happiness. "Honey," he said, "That explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?

"Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling the doilies on Ebay."
 

AreaCode707

Lifer
Sep 21, 2001
18,445
131
106
I've heard it where the husband has a chest the wife can't look into. Finally temptation gets the best of her after 50 odd years and she peeks. Three beer cans and $25,000. She's puzzled but goes to her husband, confesses, and asks him about it.

He comes clean and tells her that he put a beer can in the chest every time he cheated on her. She figures that three times in fifty years isn't bad, and asks him about the cash. He answers, "Every time the chest got full I took it in to recycling."
 

RossMAN

Grand Nagus
Feb 24, 2000
78,862
360
136
Originally posted by: HotChic
I've heard it where the husband has a chest the wife can't look into. Finally temptation gets the best of her after 50 odd years and she peeks. Three beer cans and $25,000. She's puzzled but goes to her husband, confesses, and asks him about it.

He comes clean and tells her that he put a beer can in the chest every time he cheated on her. She figures that three times in fifty years isn't bad, and asks him about the cash. He answers, "Every time the chest got full I took it in to recycling."

LOL I like that version of the joke more.
 

GtPrOjEcTX

Lifer
Jul 3, 2001
10,784
6
81
I find it interesting how Brutuskend dogs on the men, while the HotChic dogs on the women. Nice.
 

MichaelD

Lifer
Jan 16, 2001
31,528
3
76
Originally posted by: HotChic
I've heard it where the husband has a chest the wife can't look into. Finally temptation gets the best of her after 50 odd years and she peeks. Three beer cans and $25,000. She's puzzled but goes to her husband, confesses, and asks him about it.

He comes clean and tells her that he put a beer can in the chest every time he cheated on her. She figures that three times in fifty years isn't bad, and asks him about the cash. He answers, "Every time the chest got full I took it in to recycling."

I heard it that way too...except with Bill and Hillary Clinton as the husband and wife! :D