Roommates from Hell - shamelessly ripped off from somethingawful forums

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
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http://forums.somethingawful.c...d.php?threadid=2620844

Reading this thread reminds me of a roommate college who would take huge dumps and would dump cigarettes in our toilet... he left a huge black and brown ring of feces and cigarette ash permanently etched into our toilet. Absolutely disgusting. He was never around. Good thing too, because i wanted to punch him in the face for what he did.

What's your roommate horror story?

edit:

Ok i'll copy/paste the 1st page:

Lao Tsu
Dec 26, 2006
I love Cape Horn

Early this year, we met for what my college calls "Beginnings". At that time we had an interview about our living and study habits in order to pair us up with someone who would be a good roommate. I am not completely sure of the questions and answers in the interview, but I do remember a few things I specifically stated that my roommate is not only different, he is exactly opposite of what I requested.

We get along, but I'm either gonna put up with it and let my grades suffer, or one day snap.

I said that I need it absolutely quiet for me to be able to do my best work. I also said I wanted a roommate who would collaborate with me when it came to a fridge, a tv, and a rug.

Now, they paired me with a football player who had already moved in, bringing a fridge, tv and rug for his "half" of the room, and when I arrived I was pretty much stuck with what was left. His tv, rug and fridge were all positioned in ways that it was impossible to share, and I had to make some emergency calls to end up with a fridge of my own a week and a half later.

My brother last year was paired with a German shut in who never showered and played video games on his laptop the entire time.

Enough of me, because my story isn't that interesting, what bad roommate assignments have your schools made?

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:24

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Joshua Thorn
Sep 07, 2007

by Fistgrrl

My last roommate was a gun enthusiast. The day we moved in he brought in two rifles and I said "You have two rifles??" The only thing he said to me was "More coming." He just kept bringing in gun after gun until I paid him to stop.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:26

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park

I dunno how anyone lives in these things you Americans call dorms. I don't think we have anything like them over here in Australia, but they sound fucking awful.

Sounds like living in a hostel.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:28

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ScootsMagoo
Aug 10, 2003

"SNAKES!"

I had a roommate who microwaved eggo waffles (who does this?) for so long the microwave (my microwave) started billowing smoke which set off the smoke alarms, leading to the evacuation of the entire building. At 3AM. During midterms.

He also would have friends over to "produce tracks", which he'd rap over. His rap name was "Young ***** E" and one of his songs contained the line "ain't got no future 'cause I'll never go to college".

zarbicore posted:

I dunno how anyone lives in these things you Americans call dorms. I don't think we have anything like them over here in Australia, but they sound fucking awful.

Sounds like living in a hostel.

Actually, more like a prison where you're allowed to come and go as you please.

ScootsMagoo fucked around with this message at Sep 11, 2007 around 01:32
# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:29

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Sudden Infant Def Syndrome
Oct 02, 2004





Joshua Thorn posted:

My last roommate was a gun enthusiast. The day we moved in he brought in two rifles and I said "You have two rifles??" The only thing he said to me was "More coming." He just kept bringing in gun after gun until I paid him to stop.

That just sounds hilarious.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:30

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NightOfBigBlue
Oct 02, 2004

Show me your moves!



Joshua Thorn posted:

My last roommate was a gun enthusiast. The day we moved in he brought in two rifles and I said "You have two rifles??" The only thing he said to me was "More coming." He just kept bringing in gun after gun until I paid him to stop.

oh boy you paid him how much did you really pay him

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:31

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park



ScootsMagoo posted:



Actually, more like a prison where you're allowed to come and go as you please.

I am trying to picture what they are like. Are they like a big huge building, with a corridor and rooms attached sort of like a jail/hotel? I am assuming each room is just that, one single room which you sleep/eat/etc in, perhaps a bathroom is attached too or perhaps the bathroom is communal?

Are they single sex also?

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:32

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Coco13
Jun 06, 2004

It's a great day for hockey. It's a great day for football as well. Hell, it's a great day for volleyball and basketball too. (But not baseball.)



zarbicore posted:

I am trying to picture what they are like. Are they like a big huge building, with a corridor and rooms attached sort of like a jail/hotel? I am assuming each room is just that, one single room which you sleep/eat/etc in, perhaps a bathroom is attached too or perhaps the bathroom is communal?

Are they single sex also?

Entire buildings aren't usually single sex, they're mostly divided by floors or large sections. Bathrooms are almost always communal. The room size is just large enough to hold a person less than what was assigned to it. You don't usually have to eat in your dorm room, there's large dining halls for that.

And in jail, your warden doesn't put stupid fucking shit on your door.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:37

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Lamech
Nov 20, 2001



My roommate in undergrad was completely inexperienced with alcohol and drugs, yet far too enthusiastic about being a drug/alcohol tough guy. We'd commonly end up at the same parties, despite having completely different groups of friends (small town). I would often end up dragging his obliterated ass back to the dorms, then the next day have to hear about how many bong hits or beers he shotgunned. And he liked Oasis.

My roommate in grad school had a parrot. 'Nuf said. It died on my birthday one year - still the best gift I've ever recieved. SQUAAAAAAAKKKKKKkkkkkkkkkk!

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:39

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do what now
Dec 09, 2006

His very own... wooden brain.

She had 50+ stuffed animals. And SHE FED THEM. SHE FED THEM PEOPLE FOOD. LIKE THEY WERE HERE BABIES.

I have plenty of crazy Melissa stories. That's just the shortest to type.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:42

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Rogue Elephant
May 01, 2007

Shaun! Hog lumps!

I live with a guy who is capable of going through a roll of toilet paper a day.

Also he goes to bed at 9:30 everynight and has no social skills at all.

Last week I woke up and he was perching on his bed like a bird, staring at me. I hid my face behind a clump of covers until he left for work.

The rest of us (I have 3 other suitemates) suspect he showers with his clothes on, because once in awhile there is a soaking wet t shirt on the towel rack for no readily apparent reason.

Rogue Elephant fucked around with this message at Sep 11, 2007 around 01:46
# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:42

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Wuhao
Apr 22, 2002

Pimpin' Lenin

I had a roommate who was a 300+ pound wiccan furry. She made a drawing of me and my girlfriend. I was a raccoon.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:42

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park



Coco13 posted:

Entire buildings aren't usually single sex, they're mostly divided by floors or large sections. Bathrooms are almost always communal. The room size is just large enough to hold a person less than what was assigned to it. You don't usually have to eat in your dorm room, there's large dining halls for that.

And in jail, your warden doesn't put stupid fucking shit on your door.

What do they put on your door?

Also do you have to pay to live in the dorms?

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:44

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yoslow
Apr 23, 2006
JROTC-ROTC o_0



zarbicore posted:

I am trying to picture what they are like. Are they like a big huge building, with a corridor and rooms attached sort of like a jail/hotel? I am assuming each room is just that, one single room which you sleep/eat/etc in, perhaps a bathroom is attached too or perhaps the bathroom is communal?

Are they single sex also?

What are the on campus living quarters like in Australia? The dorm rooms are usually small with a window and room for two beds, dressers, tv, and small fridge. The bathrooms are communal for the floor. Some colleges have the sexes split by each floor, some have half the floor, and others even have it split by room.

Edit: Yes you have to pay for the dorms, its covered under room and board which is the cost for the dorm and all your food. After your second or third year of college, a lot of students move off campus.

yoslow fucked around with this message at Sep 11, 2007 around 01:48
# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:45

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NicelyNice
Feb 13, 2004

citrus


I had a roommate who was a very cool guy, but really absent-minded. We had about eight cereal bowls between us that we shared, and over a one-month period, they slowly disappeared. Finally, when he was out, I searched through his stuff looking for them, and found them all dirty in his closet - he didn't want to leave them for me to clean in the sink, so he hid them away.

He'd also leave pizzas in the oven for DAYS at a time, either forgetting to turn the oven off or turn it on in the first place. However, one time I came home to a freshly cooked pizza sitting on the counter - nobody knew where it came from, or what it was doing there, so I ended up eating it.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:45

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krooj
Dec 02, 2006


Residence halls are fucking shit; they only serve to rip off those who are too naive to get something better. Rooming houses or shared appartments are far better solutions for most students.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:46

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Levitate
Sep 30, 2005
used to be alright



Coco13 posted:

Entire buildings aren't usually single sex, they're mostly divided by floors or large sections. Bathrooms are almost always communal. The room size is just large enough to hold a person less than what was assigned to it. You don't usually have to eat in your dorm room, there's large dining halls for that.

I guess some dorms are suites and have multiple bedrooms within one unit, and sometimes a bathroom. I wouldn't know, however, since I was stuck in what amounted to a shoebox with two other people.

I had a revolving door of roommates my first year, but the last guy who came in was probably the worst. He rarely showered, and even when he did, he came back from the shower smelling even worse. Like wet funk/mildew instead of clean. He mainly played computer games all day and watched his poor quality Japanese porn while my other roommate and I were around.

But no, his weirdest habit was staying up late/waking up early, sitting in his chair and putting rubbing alcohol under his nose, while watching my roommate and I sleep. We both woke up at times to catch him doing this, and a girlfriend of mine who once stayed the night said he did the same to her.

Just a bit creepy.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:47

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park



yoslow posted:

What are the on campus living quarters like in Australia? The dorm rooms are usually small with a window and room for two beds, dressers, tv, and small fridge. The bathrooms are communal for the floor. Some colleges have the sexes split by each floor, some have half the floor, and others even have it split by room.

I am not entirely sure as I never went to uni/college. But as I understand it they are almost always full of international students (mainly asians) and are not really cheap.

I think most students out here tend to find share accommodation of their own.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:48

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Lazy Economist
Aug 07, 2007
Fuck it. Let's just float the rate.



zarbicore posted:

What do they put on your door?

Also do you have to pay to live in the dorms?

My RA put stick figures on the doors with the names of the residents of each room. Yes, you must pay...lots.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:48

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ScootsMagoo
Aug 10, 2003

"SNAKES!"



zarbicore posted:

What do they put on your door?

Pamphlets about how to prevent rape.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:49

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park



ScootsMagoo posted:

Pamphlets about how to prevent rape.

haha I would love to see one of those. Then I will once and for all know how to be rape proof.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:51

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Fallom
May 08, 2003





Lao Tsu posted:

Now, they paired me with a football player who had already moved in, bringing a fridge, tv and rug for his "half" of the room, and when I arrived I was pretty much stuck with what was left. His tv, rug and fridge were all positioned in ways that it was impossible to share, and I had to make some emergency calls to end up with a fridge of my own a week and a half later.
Enough of me, because my story isn't that interesting, what bad roommate assignments have your schools made?

Sorry, you sound like the shitty roommate in this case. Next time try telling him about the problem. Communicate with him, he's not a bad guy just because he's a football player.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:53

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PokketMowse
Oct 26, 2004

The rodent of your dreams

Roommate #1: Crazy ass 'shaman' furry who was REALLY a dragon on the inside. Didn't wash sheets all year, trashed the room, kept moldering towels at bottom of the closet and stunk up the place. Kept roadkill in fridge, got mad when I turned in dead animal to health services. Also was stalking girl online with ultra creepy identity theft and stealing art left and right. Later ripped pages out my sketchbook, traced them badly, and turned them into furries, stole some other pieces of my art and said she drew it. Worst part? Later was reported to have castrated pet rat with scissors, was oddly baffled when he fucking died. Crazy. Crazy. CRAZY.

Roommate #2: Stereotypical jewish princess. Was overweight and apparently tried some diet where she wouldn't eat for two days, then eat an entire thing of hotdogs and ice cream on the third day. Was insane into emo culture, always had bad music playing. Continously tried to sexile me from my own room, until I just started walking in and going about my normal routine after several fucking days of it, screw that. Also drank chicken noodle soup raw and cold from the can. Left can on floor. I sliced open my left middle toe on said lid of can, requiring thirteen stitches and nearly slashing off the fat pad. Her response when I hobbled in from the hospital? 'What were you doing on my side of the room?'

Roommate #3: We actually got along pretty well. She started out as a pretty nice girl who was just into helping the environment. Over the years, she got more and more nutso about it, to the point where she became a stereotypical femminazi vegan. Practiced wicca, started sniping at people eating meat, put up GIRL POWER mess all over the walls, stopped shaving...I kind of lost contact with her. She was nice but just got way too intense with things. Last I heard she cut her hair ultra short and likes girls now. The circle is complete. I hope she's doing well though.

My last two roommates were a really nice goon, and now my boyfriend. No complaints. But damn, especially the first two. No more roommates ever again. EVER. Again.

PokketMowse fucked around with this message at Sep 11, 2007 around 01:58
# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:54

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Socket Ryanist
Aug 30, 2004
the sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side

I lived in a triple my first semester. One roommate was just a giant slacker, the other was a coke dealer (who also sold weed and did tweak) who stole my laptop when I left the door unlocked and his mom walked into the room (I left the door unlocked because it was unlocked when I got there and he was in the room at the time). I lost my birth certificate and social security card, the latter was later given to me by the police when they found it on some guy they'd just arrested for mugging. For most of that semester I slept on the couch in the common room because they had shoved all my stuff into a corner with no chance of me being able to arrange it into a sleepable configuration.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:57

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ScootsMagoo
Aug 10, 2003

"SNAKES!"



zarbicore posted:

haha I would love to see one of those. Then I will once and for all know how to be rape proof.

Did you know?! Every man is a potential rapist.

I'm not making this up.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 01:58

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LazyShell
Aug 28, 2007
not fat

Wow, a lot of people must be assigned to shitty rooms and halls. My hall is basically the lazy musician which basically means that at all reasonable hours of the day someone is playing an instrument and other people will just jump in and jam with 'em. We've all sort of become friends with each other and go to meals and other stuff together. All the door are open and people just wander room to room hanging out. Maybe I just got really lucky to be placed here.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:01

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oddeye
Jul 24, 2005

Liquid eye, Sticky eye, Tricky eye



ScootsMagoo posted:

Did you know?! Every man is a potential rapist.

I'm not making this up.

Do YOU have a penis?
Are you horny?
Are you stronger than most women?

You have just qualified to be a potential rapist!

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:03

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mtwieg
Jan 25, 2007
The dude abides



PokketMowse posted:

Roommate #2: Stereotypical jewish princess.

I have one of these, except it's a guy.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:08

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Buttes McDuff
Dec 04, 2004

Scottish Buttesman

pfft my freshman year roommate was an out of control drunk with a childhood bed wetting problem that came out in full force when he would black out. the only problem was instead of wetting the bed, he would pee on things. i woke up and saw him pissing in his closet and thought I must have been dreaming or seeing things and went back to bed. sadly the next time i woke up like that, he was pissing on the lower end of my comforter in a drunken stupor. sadly he ended up peeing the rest on himself after he fell down when i punched him in the nose

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:09

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DasMung
Jul 17, 2002
I AM A LIAR



yoslow posted:

What are the on campus living quarters like in Australia? The dorm rooms are usually small with a window and room for two beds, dressers, tv, and small fridge. The bathrooms are communal for the floor. Some colleges have the sexes split by each floor, some have half the floor, and others even have it split by room.

Edit: Yes you have to pay for the dorms, its covered under room and board which is the cost for the dorm and all your food. After your second or third year of college, a lot of students move off campus.

Wow, American dorms sound abysmal compared to ones here in the UK. At my university there were 6 rooms to a floor (usually split so that every floor had three guys and three girls), with one person in each room, and enough space to be comfortable. Showers were individual en-suite, not shared, and the kitchen came with all the essentials like a fridge, microwave, etc.

Wait, do American dorms even have kitchens? It always sounds like people just eat in dining halls and never make their own food.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:11

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Can I Phaser You
Dec 08, 2006

All Lies Lead to the Truth



zarbicore posted:

What do they put on your door?

Also do you have to pay to live in the dorms?

the stickers on our doors are the ones that go on the wall of a kindergarten classroom. little dinosaurs with everyones name on them.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:11

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Sara Lynn
Aug 27, 2007

so let our hearts take wings

My last roomie - we'll call her Sandy - was 19, and engaged to a 17 year old who was a Junior in highschool. Extremely naive, she had Disney princess shit EVERYWHERE to the point I felt like I was sleeping in a 12 year olds' room. In fact, she wanted and probably still wants to be a Disney princess at Disneyland.

Sandy's boyfriend was gross, greasy and absolutely stupid (which answers why he would be be 17 and a junior), and they had the guts to have sex in the bunk above me while I was still awake. I chewed them both out, the boyfriend fled, later leaving me with a hilarious note I still have. She was always apologizing for him, I felt bad for her until I realized that she still wants to marry him and have his babies.

Sandy never left the room because her boyfriend didn't allow her to have friends for numerous crazy reasons. Everytime I said I liked something, she'd say she liked it, she just copycatted me like crazy because she didn't have any other friends.

She wasn't a bad person, but she wasn't one I would want to live with again.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:13

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Waffleopolis
Apr 24, 2005

Always remember to smile...

My first roomate would be gone all day, and play fucking Madden all night. Also he used chewing tobacco like it's going out of style and left cups of it EVERYWHERE!

I wish my first roomate this year didn't decide to move in with his friend he was awesome.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:16

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zarbicore
Mar 13, 2004

The sun sets forever over Blackwater Park



ScootsMagoo posted:

Did you know?! Every man is a potential rapist.

I'm not making this up.

hahaha thats so awesome.

What happens when a girl rapes a guy though?

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:28

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Chief Bluntsalot
Jan 27, 2007

*cough*

This isn't at school, and my roomate has been my best friend since we were 9 or 10, but you put any two people together long enough and shit goes down.

The only really annoying thing my roomate does is runs the AC with the sliding glass porch door open.

I've come home after work numerous times with every single light on except the ones in my room, the AC at 70, and the porch door open. Ugh.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 02:28

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Invisible Scrotum
Mar 11, 2002

I'VE SLAUGHTERED MILLIONS



zarbicore posted:

hahaha thats so awesome.

What happens when a girl rapes a guy though?

"That's impossible, he probably coerced her into it somehow, which means he's still a rapist"

Dorms for non-Americans: like a shitty motel rooms that you MUST share with somebody else randomly (unless you somehow planned ahead and were able to secure a room with somebody / obtained a single).

My roommate at school was alright, we got along and he smoked weed like me. Only problem was he started doing blow after the first semester, and this only added to unrelated stress I had, and I ended up dropping out. Come to think of it I was probably the shitty roommate, seeing as how I was almost a shut-in at that time.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 03:29

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Skye425
Oct 31, 2003


My roommate was nocturnal. She slept until around 4pm everyday (never went to class) which made it impossible for me to do anything in my room because it would wake her up. Also at night she watched TV on her laptop with headphones (I asked her to because some people like to sleep around 1am) but would eat cereal and other food so damn loud it was impossible to fall asleep. Also she smoked, a lot, and our room smelled disgusting. It was horrible seeing as I come from a non-smoking family.
I think my grades suffered because of her...now I am in an apartment with roommates I picked and I am doing so much better.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 03:38

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DCGriggs
Jan 26, 2007




DasMung posted:

Wait, do American dorms even have kitchens? It always sounds like people just eat in dining halls and never make their own food.

Most 'dorms' don't even have kitchens. The ones around here usually go one step further and ban all cooking equipment altogether (no hotplates, electric grills, etc). I think it's because they either don't trust adults to be able to cook or they are trying to force business in the dining halls.

# ? Sep 11, 2007 03:44

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damn you grandpappy!
Dec 03, 2003

For my birthday I got this poorly photoshopped Jewday cake, and a lick of Funky's penis.

My dorm room is great, 4 people total, 2 bedrooms, full kitchen (minus an oven, but we have toaster ovens for that), bathroom with sink/mirror on the outside (so you can shave while someone's shitting/taking a shower), living room/dining room and ample seating space. The bedrooms are pretty decent too, but they could be bigger.

Anyway, first semester, I shared a room with a guy in the same program as me, and it turns out he was pretty cool. The other room housed the captain of the rugby team and a german exchange student (we get a lot of german exchange students). Anyway, The rugby guy was pretty cool, but was somewhat anti-social with the rest of people in the dorms. I ended up hanging out with the majority of his friends through another friend of mine, so we hung out an awful lot too. He used to have sex with his girlfriend when both the door to the apartment and his room were open, and even sometimes when his roommate was in the room, working on the computer/lieing in bed. The german guy was weird, however.

He claimed to be a computer hacker and just scanned for IP addresses of computers with vulerabilities in them, and got drunk/high with a bunch of other germans a lot, and the rugby player ended up pushing him down a flight of stairs during a big house party down the street, it was great.

The next semester I had the same configuration, but a new german roommate. He was cool, but he always hung out with girls and I have a very strong suspicion that he was into guys, and would always pass strange comments to us, his flatmates, but all in all, he was an okay guy.

Now, some of my friends in the dorms here have really strange roommates, like this big (both in size and amount) wrestling fan who used to masturbate to animu or whatever the fuck with the door open and the sound up. Or the guy who, for some reason, shit in tupperware and kept it in a drawer under the sink. Or the asian kid from hell who was somewhat of a shut-in, and got arrested for having a hitlist on his computer. There's always the *** roommates who had lesbo sex every time they made tacos for supper (which was apparently pretty often)

# ? Sep 11, 2007 03:50

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Hoover
Jul 17, 2005
The hoopy frood

My roommate was a transfer student from Beijing he went to bed at 9:00,woke up at 6:00 and would not let me leave the door open because he did nothing but study. At least he wasn't distracting.
 

MartyMcFly3

Lifer
Jan 18, 2003
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Yes, that's a stick of butter

He was a vegetarian that doesnt eat vegetables, so mainly his diet consisted of ice cream sandwiches, cheetos, french fries, and pop. His hair was everywhere in our dorm room as well. You drop something on the floor, you pick it up there's hair on it. He even managed to get hair on my toothbrush and i kept that in a drawer. That's how bad it was.

It made me physically ill to be in that room with him.
 

KLin

Lifer
Feb 29, 2000
30,223
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Originally posted by: MartyMcFly3
Yes, that's a stick of butter

He was a vegetarian that doesnt eat vegetables, so mainly his diet consisted of ice cream sandwiches, cheetos, french fries, and pop. His hair was everywhere in our dorm room as well. You drop something on the floor, you pick it up there's hair on it. He even managed to get hair on my toothbrush and i kept that in a drawer. That's how bad it was.

It made me physically ill to be in that room with him.

A junkfoodatarian?
 

MartyMcFly3

Lifer
Jan 18, 2003
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Originally posted by: KLin
Originally posted by: MartyMcFly3
Yes, that's a stick of butter

He was a vegetarian that doesnt eat vegetables, so mainly his diet consisted of ice cream sandwiches, cheetos, french fries, and pop. His hair was everywhere in our dorm room as well. You drop something on the floor, you pick it up there's hair on it. He even managed to get hair on my toothbrush and i kept that in a drawer. That's how bad it was.

It made me physically ill to be in that room with him.

A junkfoodatarian?

What pissed me off the most was after I moved out, the next year of college he came back with a buzz haircut.
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
126
Originally posted by: MartyMcFly3
Yes, that's a stick of butter

He was a vegetarian that doesnt eat vegetables, so mainly his diet consisted of ice cream sandwiches, cheetos, french fries, and pop. His hair was everywhere in our dorm room as well. You drop something on the floor, you pick it up there's hair on it. He even managed to get hair on my toothbrush and i kept that in a drawer. That's how bad it was.

It made me physically ill to be in that room with him.

Maybe he brushed his butt with it! :Q
 

jandrews

Golden Member
Aug 3, 2007
1,313
0
0
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
126
Originally posted by: jandrews
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.

Oh... i thought everyone could see the GBS forum for free.
 

ViviTheMage

Lifer
Dec 12, 2002
36,189
87
91
madgenius.com
Originally posted by: MartyMcFly3
Yes, that's a stick of butter

He was a vegetarian that doesnt eat vegetables, so mainly his diet consisted of ice cream sandwiches, cheetos, french fries, and pop. His hair was everywhere in our dorm room as well. You drop something on the floor, you pick it up there's hair on it. He even managed to get hair on my toothbrush and i kept that in a drawer. That's how bad it was.

It made me physically ill to be in that room with him.

that kid sounds disgusting !
 

jandrews

Golden Member
Aug 3, 2007
1,313
0
0
Originally posted by: Phokus
Originally posted by: jandrews
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.

Oh... i thought everyone could see the GBS forum for free.

hah well who knows maybe they can but of course work blocks that site ;0
 

MrPickins

Diamond Member
May 24, 2003
9,124
787
126
Originally posted by: Phokus
Originally posted by: jandrews
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.

Oh... i thought everyone could see the GBS forum for free.

So copy and paste already!

:confused:
 

HN

Diamond Member
Jan 19, 2001
8,186
4
0
Originally posted by: MrPickins
Originally posted by: Phokus
Originally posted by: jandrews
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.

Oh... i thought everyone could see the GBS forum for free.

So copy and paste already!

:confused:
uh...no. please do not copy and paste all the stories here lest we get another 'better nate than lever' incident.
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
126
Originally posted by: MrPickins
Originally posted by: Phokus
Originally posted by: jandrews
I cant believe you made this thread then just gave us a link to a paid subscription only forum instead of copying and pasting the content.

Oh... i thought everyone could see the GBS forum for free.

So copy and paste already!

:confused:

Well, i editted the op and copy/pasted the 1st page of stories... my favorite:

My last roommate was a gun enthusiast. The day we moved in he brought in two rifles and I said "You have two rifles??" The only thing he said to me was "More coming." He just kept bringing in gun after gun until I paid him to stop.
 

jtvang125

Diamond Member
Nov 10, 2004
5,399
51
91
I have no problems with my roommate and we're cool and all but we can probably go 2 or 3 weeks without saying a word to each other.
 

clamum

Lifer
Feb 13, 2003
26,252
403
126
Hahaha, pretty good ones from Something Awful.

I only stayed in the dorms my first year and just got paired with a random guy. It wasn't too bad... he was a pretty chill dude and looking back we didn't even talk to each other a whole lot, haha.

He would have porn going on his laptop sometimes while a friend was visiting me, though he had his headphones plugged in or the volume off at least. Sometimes when he'd be playing Super Smash Bros. he'd yell out an extremely loud "FSCK" or "GODDAMNIT" but that's not too weird I suppose. Only thing that made me not really like him was some racist comments he'd sometimes make. It was hard to tell if he was just joking or serious, but I sorta think he was serious.

When I was getting the last of my stuff together to leave at the end of the year, he did remark that I was "the best roommate ever" so I guess that's cool, haha.
 

Triumph

Lifer
Oct 9, 1999
15,031
14
81
Thanks for wasting my time. I'd stick through the horrible formatting and generally difficult-to-read-ness if there were some good stories in there. But there aren't. People have roommates who smell and who make messes. Whooptie doo!

 

Ns1

No Lifer
Jun 17, 2001
55,420
1,600
126
Originally posted by: Triumph
Thanks for wasting my time. I'd stick through the horrible formatting and generally difficult-to-read-ness if there were some good stories in there. But there aren't. People have roommates who smell and who make messes. Whooptie doo!

QFT

stopped reading after 3 stories
 

clamum

Lifer
Feb 13, 2003
26,252
403
126
Originally posted by: Triumph
Thanks for wasting my time. I'd stick through the horrible formatting and generally difficult-to-read-ness if there were some good stories in there. But there aren't. People have roommates who smell and who make messes. Whooptie doo!
Eh, I think there's a few good ones in there:

My last roommate was a gun enthusiast. The day we moved in he brought in two rifles and I said "You have two rifles??" The only thing he said to me was "More coming." He just kept bringing in gun after gun until I paid him to stop.

She had 50+ stuffed animals. And SHE FED THEM. SHE FED THEM PEOPLE FOOD. LIKE THEY WERE HERE BABIES.

I have plenty of crazy Melissa stories. That's just the shortest to type.

I had a roommate who was a 300+ pound wiccan furry. She made a drawing of me and my girlfriend. I was a raccoon.

But no, his weirdest habit was staying up late/waking up early, sitting in his chair and putting rubbing alcohol under his nose, while watching my roommate and I sleep. We both woke up at times to catch him doing this, and a girlfriend of mine who once stayed the night said he did the same to her.

Now, some of my friends in the dorms here have really strange roommates, like this big (both in size and amount) wrestling fan who used to masturbate to animu or whatever the fuck with the door open and the sound up. Or the guy who, for some reason, shit in tupperware and kept it in a drawer under the sink. Or the asian kid from hell who was somewhat of a shut-in, and got arrested for having a hitlist on his computer. There's always the *** roommates who had lesbo sex every time they made tacos for supper (which was apparently pretty often)
 

Phokus

Lifer
Nov 20, 1999
22,994
779
126
Originally posted by: Triumph
Thanks for wasting my time. I'd stick through the horrible formatting and generally difficult-to-read-ness if there were some good stories in there. But there aren't. People have roommates who smell and who make messes. Whooptie doo!

If something like this pisses you off, i suggest euthanizing yourself maybe?
 

AMCRambler

Diamond Member
Jan 23, 2001
7,714
31
91
What the hell is a wiccan furry and what in god's name is shit lasagna!?!?

Edit: You know what? Nevermind about the shit lasagna. I don't want to know.
 

Drakkon

Diamond Member
Aug 14, 2001
8,401
1
0
My roommate during soph year was a freak. He moved in and immediately we had not much in common. This guy didn't shower but once every other month, never washed his clothes, ate nothing but the cheapest grossest stuff, and just overall grossed me out all of the time. The room reeked of something awful, he liked it dark all the time so who knows what grew in there, and i couldn't bring anyone over as it was just awful. Then on top of all this and the 'freak' part - he was a Rocky Horror Picture show actor for the local town players. He played the hunchback butler and looked the part. He loved the movie and could quote all the lines, wore mascara all the time, had the stockings and all in his closet to dress up as tim curry. Yet somehow he managed a fairly decent looking girlfriend, she was pretty, clean, friendly, almost his complete opposite. The night it all came to a head was I am awoken by the sound of the door closing, the room is pitch black and all the sudden i hear water running (there is a sink in the room) so i guessing its that. I manage to adjust my eyes enough just in time to see the guy has used our sink as a urinal.

How i got back: The morning after the pissing incident I go off to the gym I come back to the room to find his girlfriend there. Now after just working out you know you look all buff and sweaty - well apparently thats what this girl liked. So i played along and let her touch the stomach/chest (oh how i miss my psuedo 6 pack :()and i could see it was pissing him off. But i go off and take a shower (of course flirting a little asking if he wants to come with me, she says 'yes' and follows me out the door laughing). Come back to the room and go to put some clothes on and she comes over to my side of the room and starts talking to me so this time i tackle her onto my bed, pull her under the covers and throw my towel away (i had underwear on), and the whole time she is laughing her ass off. At this point he just stormed out of the room - luckily it didn't break them up but it got him pissed to the point he asked the RA for me to be transfered out which I gladly agreed to. I ended up with a Navajo dude who only had classes twice a week and practically left the room to me because he had a wife/kids 100 miles away that he rather stay with most of the time.