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quick question... about life after college

S

skim milk

Diamond Member
I graduated in December and I feel like I'm missing something. In college, I was a bit of the anti-social loner type.. I knew people but I didn't go partying every weekend. Yeah, I could've had more fun and met more people (esp. girls) but whatever, it's in the past and I don't really like to think about it anymore. I was very much fixated on moving into a big city after graduation.. thinking that's where life really begins. So, I ended up in a big city, delaying the working corporate world until July and I'm just here taking classes. I'm seeking a part-time internship in the meantime so I can have more experience and earn money even though I have a full time job lined up. Am I doing the right thing? From a career standpoint, yes... but my social life is lacking. I can say that I never really had a fulfilling social life and I was never the type to be surrounded by friends. I'm used to being independent and doing things alone but as I'm getting older, there's a void. Am I not busy enough? Once I start working a full time job, I won't have time to think about this stuff right? That's what I'm hoping for.
 
Yeah, I'm kind of like that too. I have a large number of friends, but only a few of them I actually hang out with. I don't like being in big crowds, but I don't like being alone. If I were you, I'd say get at least a few friends to hang out with and keep the rest of your life the same. Keep the career thing you have going and fit some friends in your schedule somewhere.
 
only thing i can say is to think about hobbies that you might enjoy. Depending on what company you work for, there may be a social life (esp. if they recruit many college-aged people). If you join a company where there are many folks with 30 years experience in that company, you won't be having much of a social life.
 
Based on your interests/hobbies, join some clubs (volunteer, sports, book, etc) or take some adult education classes (cooking, photography, etc) and meet people. One of the great things about living in a big city is the huge number of activities available.

When work really starts, there will be busy times and you may be too tired to go out afterwards sometimes but eventually you'll manage your time and find time for fun.
 
Originally posted by: fritolays
I graduated in December and I feel like I'm missing something. In college, I was a bit of the anti-social loner type.. I knew people but I didn't go partying every weekend. Yeah, I could've had more fun and met more people (esp. girls) but whatever, it's in the past and I don't really like to think about it anymore. I was very much fixated on moving into a big city after graduation.. thinking that's where life really begins. So, I ended up in a big city, delaying the working corporate world until July and I'm just here taking classes. I'm seeking a part-time internship in the meantime so I can have more experience and earn money even though I have a full time job lined up. Am I doing the right thing? From a career standpoint, yes... but my social life is lacking. I can say that I never really had a fulfilling social life and I was never the type to be surrounded by friends. I'm used to being independent and doing things alone but as I'm getting older, there's a void. Am I not busy enough? Once I start working a full time job, I won't have time to think about this stuff right? That's what I'm hoping for.
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Welcome to being a geek on a computer hardware forum.
 
You aren't doing anything to improve your social life. Working all the time isn't the answer, you have to find a balance.
 
Originally posted by: Muadib
You aren't doing anything to improve your social life. Working all the time isn't the answer, you have to find a balance.
Click to expand...

Thank you Capt. Obvious
 
I swear I've read a thread like this in the past few months.
Seems ATOT attracts that sort of person.:Q

Once I graduate this fall (or maybe in spring, we'll see) and get a job, I'll be sure to post a similar thread. 😀
 
Just realize that having a lot of "buddies" or other lightweight (going out type) friends is not very fulfilling. One or two really close friends that you can always count on is way more important in my opinion. I have friends of both types, and am really grateful for my true friends.

I have to admit that my best friend is my wife though...it may sound cheesy to anyone who doesn't have a relationship like that, but it makes for a great marriage.
 
Originally posted by: fritolays
I graduated in December and I feel like I'm missing something. In college, I was a bit of the anti-social loner type.. I knew people but I didn't go partying every weekend. Yeah, I could've had more fun and met more people (esp. girls) but whatever, it's in the past and I don't really like to think about it anymore. I was very much fixated on moving into a big city after graduation.. thinking that's where life really begins. So, I ended up in a big city, delaying the working corporate world until July and I'm just here taking classes. I'm seeking a part-time internship in the meantime so I can have more experience and earn money even though I have a full time job lined up. Am I doing the right thing? From a career standpoint, yes... but my social life is lacking. I can say that I never really had a fulfilling social life and I was never the type to be surrounded by friends. I'm used to being independent and doing things alone but as I'm getting older, there's a void. Am I not busy enough? Once I start working a full time job, I won't have time to think about this stuff right? That's what I'm hoping for.
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Yep, ATOT attracts us for some reason. I was a pretty anti-social loner type in college too - but thats because I was depressed for most of my several years there and plagued with all sorts of issues. Thinking back, I regret not getting out more. The problems would'nt have gone away, but maybe I wouldn't have been that miserable.

Things have improved much now, and I'm happier - but its much harder to recapture something that you've otherwise missed. I'm trying to make up for that by simply doing activities I like - like a poster mentioned - interest clubs, going to bars, dance and that sort of thing. While it can't replace how college would have been, it certainly adds to life. I work full time, and always try to to things in the weekend.

So what I'd recommend is, try doing a couple of interesting, social activities you like. Make a few good friends and hang out with them. Quality over quantity anytime.

Once you start working full time, true, you won't have much time to waste feeling a void. However, working full time will also leave you stressed out and sometimes you just won't have the energy to begin doing social stuff. So if you start now, and have a good base of activities going, when you start working, you'll be able to transition into only doing things that you like.

 
You sound like you need to up your manliness factor, go sky diving, buy a motorcycle, go rock climbing, do some coke lines(j/k) just do something that gets your adrenaline going and makes you see life for ride that it is.
Basically just get out of your head and your office and do something fun.
 
When I graduated I suddenly "blossomed". I found friends and we went out almost every Friday night, drinking and dancing.

It's funny but I went through school thinking that life would be better AFTER graduation. At first it appeared hat my assumption was true but as time passed I found that the weight of "life", i.e. girlfriends, work , etc. made the pressure of school seem like nothing.

If I've learned one thing in 40 years ... it is that your life is what you make of it. If you are not happy with it you should stop and look in the mirror and see that no one is holding a gun to your head. It is ultimately your choice as to how you live the days that you are given.

If you are unhappy with the way things are going ... change it.
 
Originally posted by: Quintox
Originally posted by: Muadib
You aren't doing anything to improve your social life. Working all the time isn't the answer, you have to find a balance.
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Thank you Capt. Obvious
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And just how is your post an improvement over mine?:disgust:

 
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