- Jul 13, 2005
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How to Pick Your Nose Properly
Steps
1. Quickly and discretely check for stray observers that are watching your every move.
2. If someone is watching, abort mission and revert to usage of bathroom/library.
3. Strategically pick correct hand (right for right nostril, left for left).
4. Extend index finger.
5. Approach with caution and flick eyes about for final check of nearby watchers.
6. Go in for the kill/extraction and quickly.
7. Retreat!!
8. With other hand, wipe nose area normally
9. Examine booger
10. Examine surroundings for secret "hiding place" of booger.
11. Place booger in hiding place.
12. Wipe hand off on shirt.
12. Attempt quick check of other nostril.
13. Wrinkle and unwrinkle nose.
14. Proceed with day.
Tips
* For hiding places I recommend places where a squidge like object is, for maximum destruction of booger.
Warnings
* DO NOT EAT!!!!!!!!!! Could cause extreme constipation and or indigestion.
* Seven booger related deaths by result of extreme and forceful extraction (this can cause nose bone to break and enter brain) have been recorded.
* BE WARY OF OBSERVERS.
Things You'll Need
* Hand
* Booger
* Nose
* Brain
* Eyes
* Body
* Life
* Room
* Finger nail (for extra extraction material)
Steps
1. Quickly and discretely check for stray observers that are watching your every move.
2. If someone is watching, abort mission and revert to usage of bathroom/library.
3. Strategically pick correct hand (right for right nostril, left for left).
4. Extend index finger.
5. Approach with caution and flick eyes about for final check of nearby watchers.
6. Go in for the kill/extraction and quickly.
7. Retreat!!
8. With other hand, wipe nose area normally
9. Examine booger
10. Examine surroundings for secret "hiding place" of booger.
11. Place booger in hiding place.
12. Wipe hand off on shirt.
12. Attempt quick check of other nostril.
13. Wrinkle and unwrinkle nose.
14. Proceed with day.
Tips
* For hiding places I recommend places where a squidge like object is, for maximum destruction of booger.
Warnings
* DO NOT EAT!!!!!!!!!! Could cause extreme constipation and or indigestion.
* Seven booger related deaths by result of extreme and forceful extraction (this can cause nose bone to break and enter brain) have been recorded.
* BE WARY OF OBSERVERS.
Things You'll Need
* Hand
* Booger
* Nose
* Brain
* Eyes
* Body
* Life
* Room
* Finger nail (for extra extraction material)