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[Schadenfroh]

Today's accomplishments in the world of IT:

1. User called to report that a PC made a high pitch sound, after it was shut down, the computer would just hang at the gateway bios screen. I get down there and inspect it, the keyboard came up plugged.

2. User could not open attachments in OE. Reason: She had opening of attachments disabled in outlook express.

3. Word Perfect is screwing up. Reason: She was accidentally hitting the magnification button.

4. User could not login to email account. Reason: CAPS lock was on.

5. User having strange pop ups. Reason: User installed a screen saver and smilies shortly before it started

6. User disk would not work. Reason: user placed label over sliding metal part of disk rather than the correct place.

7. User could not open attachment in Outlook. Reason: User sucked at working outlook

 

[dighn]

Originally posted by: Schadenfroh
Today's accomplishments in the world of IT:
2. User could not open attachments in OE. Reason: She had opening of attachments disabled in outlook express.

I think at one time (maybe still) OE came with opening of attachments disabled to combat user naiveness.

 

[Squisher]

I'm not in IT, but see sig.

 

[wallsfd949]

My conversation with the 'Help Desk' trying to get a user's Sun workstation to respond.



Help Desk - The user's workstation is locked up.

Me - What exactly do you see?

HD - I rebooted the machine from my workstation. The user can login but can't do anything.

Me - I'm able to get in to the workstation and I can't see where any processes are hung... ? What are you seeing?

HD - Once he logs in, the machine just locks up.

Me - I'm going to reboot the box from here. Once it comes back up, have a different user login
........

HD - Still locked up.

Me - Can you do anything with the keyboard?

HD - Oh yes, the keyboard works fine, but he can't use the mouse for anything...

Me - (sighs) do you have any replacement mice or a mouse from a different workstation

Pause.. .....

HD - Hold on..... oh, that was it....


Me - (shakes head in disbelief) So it's working now...

HD - Yep, thanks - bye....


.....

And that's the help desk...

 

[OffTopic1]

User called me up (was upset because she have to have her proposal in 15 minutes) & said that her computer wouldn't start -- janitor accidentally unplugged it the night before.

Boss called me up & said that his computer is fugging up -- I toll him that I will log on to his computer in 15 minutes to take a look. Terminal into the boss puter I found that he was looking at porn in his emails. I cleaned out his locall hdd & had to save his 1.4GB of porn.
In a private meeting a week later I told him what I saw wasn't apropriate in a working environment -- the next day I found the server hdds gained 3.5GB of of space.

 

[trilks]

A few people were in to meet with the bosses in our conference room. They took a break, and one of the guys asked if he could use a computer, so I grabbed a laptop and plugged it in to our network, all ready to go. He then says he wants to access his computer at home. Fair enough, but I ask him if he has Remote Desktop set up or anything. Of course he's never heard of it. Go on to find out he uses dial up at home, so his computer is not even connected to the internet at the moment. I politely explain that it will be impossible to connect to it, return to my desk, and bang my head on the keyboard.

I realize that he's not a computer genius or anything, but how did he expect to connect to his home computer? A little common sense goes a long way...

 

went to a ladies house because her 1 day old computer kept rebooting
when i got there, the pc was already rebooting nonstop (user didn't unplug or anything)
i couldn't get it to run (safe mode, bios, etc) it'd restart every 5 or 6 seconds

finally i get down under the desk to unplug the computer...i notice a friggin screwdriver JAMMED into the power switch
confused..i ask her about it
she said it wouldn't shut off when she hit the button...and she said the button had a screwdriver slot in it, so she jammed one in
turns out the button had a vertical slot style LED
she jammed a screwdriver into it and the power switch was stuck

i told her to send it back to dell or gateway (can't remember) because it had a faulty power switch

 

[imported_Strang]

Eh, the most annoying one I had this week was for a network printer. The front desk receptionist came to me in a bother because the printer stopped working and she had printed some sort of sensitive information to it. So I had her tell me a bit more about the problem and she said that it had been printing some sort of map and so she banged on the printer and turned it off and back on. I explained that it was probably printing someone else's job and that her job was going to be in the queue -- she replied that she understands that it must've been someone else's print job, but didn't have time to babysit the printer.

At which point, I'm like "..."

So I check the queue on the printer -- it's a receipt for a freaking corset that she's buying from some lame RenFaire site. And now the job that had been printing is stuck and the print spooler on the server had to be restarted.

I just can't figure out why someone who understands the concept of a print queue would think that beating on a printer would somehow get their job to print instead.