Post your favorite pirate joke here!

[Illusio]

If there is a bad pirate joke, I haven't heard it! I'll get the ball rolling with an oldy, but goody...

Did you hear about the new pirate movie thats comming out?

Its rated ARRRRRRRRRGG

 

[pulse8]

Ouch. My sides.

 

[azazyel]

Whats a pirates favorite country?

Arrrrrrrrrrrgentina.


Pirate riddles

 

[Rallispec]

what did the pirate say about this thread?

its retarrrgggrded

 

[StevenYoo]

How much do pirates usually cost?

A buccaneer

 

[mdennison]

A seaman meets a pirate in a port, and talk turns to their adventures on the sea. The seaman notes that the pirate has a peg leg, a hook, and an eye patch. The seaman asks, "So, how did you end up with the peg leg?"

The pirate replies, "Aye, matey, we was in a storm at sea, and I was swept overboard into a school of sharks. Just as me men were pulling me out, a shark bit me leg off."

"Wow!" said the seaman. "What about your hook?"

"Well," replied the pirate, "We were boarding an enemy ship and were battling the other sailors with swords. One of the enemy cut my hand off."

"Incredible!" remarked the seaman. "How did you get the eye patch?"

"A sea-gull dropping fell into me eye," replied the pirate.

"You lost your eye to a sea-gull dropping?" the sailor asked incredulously.

"Not exactly," said the pirate. "It was me first day with the hook."

 

[Illusio]

that reminds me of another one:

Blackbeard walks into a bar one day, sits down and orders a drink. The bartender walks up to him, laughs, and says "what, did you just come from a costume party?"

Blackbeard says, "No, I'm a pirate dammit, I'm blackbeard!"

the bartender goes, "oh yeah, well where are your Bucaneers?"

Blackbeard says "On me Bucan-Head!"


-------------------------

Ba-da-ching!

 

[Perknose]

Ok, so what do a poorly staffed pirate ship and a used condom have in common?

They're both full of useless se(a)men!!

Btw, it wasn't a "joke" per se, but I still laugh years and years later when I think back to the old SNL skit aboard THE RAGING QUEEN.

 

[darkjester]

LOL!!! Those last two were awesome! Thanks for the laugh!

 

[Geekbabe]

LOL, shakes my head at you guys.. oh well at least all of your jokes are funnier than ultravox's

 

[Fausto]

A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel sticking out of his pants.

The bartender says, "Hey, you got a steering wheel sticking out of your pants!"

The pirate says, "ARRRRRRRRR, it's drivin' me nuts!!"



Fausto