Poor little Ireland...

imported_Tomato

Diamond Member
Sep 11, 2002
7,608
0
0
Good grief

The settlement left nothing to chance, not even Halloween: "Petitioner (Basinger) is awarded Halloween on even numbered years and Respondent (Baldwin) is awarded Halloween in odd numbered years." The same odd-even arrangement applies for Ireland's birthday, spring break, Christmas, New Year's, and summer vacation.

Here's the rest of it:

Chats: The agreement stipulates set times for the non-present parent to call Ireland (Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays from 8 a.m. to 8:30 a.m. for ten minutes max), with both stars ordered to keep a record of their phone chats.

Socializing: "Each party shall promptly turn over to the other party any invitations for the minor child to attend special events or occasions with her friends without telling the minor child about the invitation." In other words, mom and dad have to discuss any and all kiddie invites before they tell Ireland about them.

Bad-Mouthing: Neither party is allowed to discuss "disagreements and differences of opinion about the custody and visitation orders" or make "derogatory remarks about the other in front of or within the hearing of" Ireland, her friends, her friends' parents, teachers, et al.

Hired Help: Baldwin must hire a "child care assistant" for "any personal feminine assistance" Ireland may need when she's with him overnight.

Communication: Basinger must install a designated phone line in her kitchen to "receive emergency telephone calls or information" from Baldwin about "logistical changes" to their coordinated plans.

Therapy: Basinger and Baldwin must attend 6 to 12 "parent centeredness counseling" sessions, which sound like a pretty good idea, especially given this petty stipulation: "Neither party shall attend [Ireland'] karate [classes] during the other parent's custodial time."
 

RagingBITCH

Lifer
Sep 27, 2003
17,618
2
76
Jesus, parents that idiotic should not be allowed to breed. So much for doing what's best for their child's interest. She'll more than likely rebel and become a porn star.
 

AFB

Lifer
Jan 10, 2004
10,718
3
0
Originally posted by: RagingBITCH
Jesus, parents that idiotic should not be allowed to breed. So much for doing what's best for their child's interest. She'll more than likely rebel and become a porn star.

Yay :beer: for the parents
 

Armitage

Banned
Feb 23, 2001
8,086
0
0
Actually, except for some bits like the "hired help" and special phone line, it doesn't sound unlike a typical parenting plan. Maybe a bit more anal. It's fairly similar to what I & my ex have, and on the scale of things, ours was low conflict.