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Please criticize my essay

Airsofter

Banned
Hi, I'm entering my senior year of high school. For my honors LA class, we had to read Native Son and respond to a question with an essay. Like usual, I waited to the last minute. I just read the summary on spark notes and wrote the essay (took 23 minutes to write, I like to time myself lol). I'd like to get off on a good start (meh, its 5% of my grade), so I appreciate any criticism on my essay Here was the question topic:

"Some novels seem to advocate changes in social or political attitudes or in traditions. From native son, note briefly the particular attitudes or traditions that Wright apparently wishes to modify. Then analyze the literary techniques (plot, point of five, setting, symbolism, irony, etc.) the author uses to influence the reader's or audience?s views."

And here is my essay:

"In the novel Native Son, Richard Wright does not attempt to hide his opinions of America during the 1930?s. From the start, Wright stresses the need for white Americans to open their eyes and change their view of the black community. He uses his book to advocate changes in its audience, 1930?s literate, and mainly white, America.

Even long after the end of slavery, black and white people still weren?t perceived as equals. Throughout the novel, Wright shows that each group of people does not recognize the other as individuals. Seen through the eyes of white people, blacks are an inferior race and a blemish on American culture. Black people think of whites as an oppressive force that is untrustworthy and frightening to them.

Wright uses many different techniques to convey this point. The story is told from the perspective of atypical protagonist, Bigger Thomas. Wright does not attempt to give Bigger any redeeming qualities or traits evident in the standard hero. He places Bigger in the same position that millions of Americans were in during the 1930?s. He grows up in the lowest rung of the social ladder, receives a poor and limited education, and is reserved to menial jobs. Ultimately, Bigger descends to the life of a criminal and eventually murders two people. We can see that Bigger is not entirely at fault though. He is a product of his environment and continued racial oppression. Whites have effectively transformed Bigger into their own stereotype of a black person.

During the 1930?s, the media was largely responsible for much of the racism in America. Newspapers, films, and magazines had already decided the fate of Bigger before his trial even began. Although, white people also make victims of themselves with their racism. Ironically, the Dalton family underestimates Bigger, and he is able to manipulate them into thinking that he is incapable of committing such a crime.

On a more symbolic level, Wright uses Mrs. Dalton?s blindness to further his point. Bigger ends up murdering Mary because her mother can?t see Bigger and he smothers her while trying to keep her quiet. Just as her literal blindness caused Bigger to murder someone, the figurative blindness of the white population causes millions of blacks to turn to violence. White people are blind in the sense that they fail to see blacks as individuals, and ultimately, this racism ends with more violence."
 
It's a bit generic no doubt and not quite my style, but I catered to the teacher a bit. I had her before so I know what she looks for. She seems to like:

-restating the question/topic
-mentioning the title and author
-bullsh!tting (seriously)
-keeping it short
-unconventional formatting
-specific examples
-smooth transitioning
-insightfulness (lol)
 
Originally posted by: Airsofter
Hi, I'm entering my senior year of high school. For my honors LA class, we had to read Native Son and respond to a question with an essay. Like usual, I waited to the last minute. I just read the summary on spark notes and wrote the essay (took 23 minutes to write, I like to time myself lol). I'd like to get off on a good start (meh, its 5% of my grade), so I appreciate any criticism on my essay Here was the question topic:

"Some novels seem to advocate changes in social or political attitudes or in traditions. From native son, note briefly the particular attitudes or traditions that Wright apparently wishes to modify. Then analyze the literary techniques (plot, point of five, setting, symbolism, irony, etc.) the author uses to influence the reader's or audience?s views."

And here is my essay:

"In the novel Native Son, Richard Wright does not attempt to hide his opinions of America during the 1930?s. From the start, Wright stresses the need for white Americans to open their eyes and change their view of the black community. He uses his book to advocate changes in its audience, 1930?s literate, and mainly white, America.

Even long after the end of slavery, black and white people still weren?t perceived as equals. Throughout the novel, Wright shows that each group of people does not recognize the other as individuals. Seen through the eyes of white people, blacks are an inferior race and a blemish on American culture. Black people think of whites as an oppressive force that is untrustworthy and frightening to them.

Wright uses many different techniques to convey this point. The story is told from the perspective of atypical protagonist, Bigger Thomas. Wright does not attempt to give Bigger any redeeming qualities or traits evident in the standard hero. He places Bigger in the same position that millions of Americans were in during the 1930?s. He grows up in the lowest rung of the social ladder, receives a poor and limited education, and is reserved to menial jobs. Ultimately, Bigger descends to the life of a criminal and eventually murders two people. We can see that Bigger is not entirely at fault though. He is a product of his environment and continued racial oppression. Whites have effectively transformed Bigger into their own stereotype of a black person.

During the 1930?s, the media was largely responsible for much of the racism in America. Newspapers, films, and magazines had already decided the fate of Bigger before his trial even began. Although, white people also make victims of themselves with their racism. Ironically, the Dalton family underestimates Bigger, and he is able to manipulate them into thinking that he is incapable of committing such a crime.

On a more symbolic level, Wright uses Mrs. Dalton?s blindness to further his point. Bigger ends up murdering Mary because her mother can?t see Bigger and he smothers her while trying to keep her quiet. Just as her literal blindness caused Bigger to murder someone, the figurative blindness of the white population causes millions of blacks to turn to violence. White people are blind in the sense that they fail to see blacks as individuals, and ultimately, this racism ends with more violence."


I'm not sure I agree with the last sentence, but it's written well.
 
Originally posted by: PaulNEPats

I'm not sure I agree with the last sentence, but it's written well.

I was trying to base that off the time period the book was written about, the 1930's, in which that statement may ring true (at least from the author's perspective)

And reverse discrimination FTW. I learned my lesson after getting hammered for a report on sweatshop labor. During my presentation, I mentioned that sweatshops are partly responsible for the boom in China's economy.

The teacher proceeded to argue with me for upwards of 30 minutes and gave me a C- on an excellent 40 page powerpoint presentation that went well beyond the requirements and provided many solutions to unsafe working conditions and such. Of course, all kinds of accusations come when you state a true fact.

And btw, you guessed it. The teacher was Chinese
 
Thats a really short essay for a senior honors english class. Shouldn't it be at least 3 pages or so?
 
Originally posted by: Leros
Thats a really short essay for a senior honors english class. Shouldn't it be at least 3 pages or so?

In honor class, you can use size 24 font.
 
Originally posted by: Leros
Thats a really short essay for a senior honors english class. Shouldn't it be at least 3 pages or so?

I got docked 5 points last year when I had her for writing a two and a half page essay DOUBLE Spaced on the book "Night" I've kept most of my essays concise since then. The teacher's a dimwit no doubt.
 
Originally posted by: Baked
Originally posted by: Leros
Thats a really short essay for a senior honors english class. Shouldn't it be at least 3 pages or so?

In honor class, you can use size 24 font.

Mine was always size 10 font, Times New Roman. 1" Margins. Double space. At least 3 pages.
 
Originally posted by: Leros
Originally posted by: Baked
Originally posted by: Leros
Thats a really short essay for a senior honors english class. Shouldn't it be at least 3 pages or so?

In honor class, you can use size 24 font.

Mine was always size 10 font, Times New Roman. 1" Margins. Double space. At least 3 pages.


Your special. 12pt font, 14pt if the teacher's an idiot, 1.2in margins
 
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