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Old Letterman Top 10 lists > New Top 10 lists

Jfrag Teh Foul

Diamond Member
LMFAO

TED KENNEDY'S TOP TEN PARTY TIPS

10 - Having a son or nephew around is a great ice-breaker with the younger babes

9 - Flaming tumblers of sambuca keep away the mosquitoes

8 - Pretending to lose a contact lens is a terrific way to look up skirts

7 - Make sure cocktail napkins have liability waiver on back

6 - Wake up the kids after midnight for Jell-O shots

5 - Mix Chivas and Slim-Fast: get drunk AND lose weight

4 - Two words: Wang Chung

3 - Invite Supreme Court Justice David Souter - that guy is a party animal!

2 - Billy Dee Williams was right: Colt .45

1 - Take off pants. Mingle.


 
HA!

THE TOP TEN AMISH SPRING BREAK ACTIVITIES

10 - Drink molasses 'til you heave

9 - Annual wet bonnet contest

8 - Buttermilk keg parties

7 - Blow past the Dairy Queen on a really bitchin' Clydesdale

6 - Get "Born to Raise Barns" tattoo on left thigh

5 - Cruise streets of Fort Lauderdale shouting insults at people with zippers

4 - Add more peppers and onions to the recipe (Oh, I'm sorry, that's one of the "Top Ten *Omelette* Spring Break Activities")

3 - Sleep in until 5am

2 - Drive over to Mennonite country and kick some ass

1 - Churning butter naked

 
Top Ten Things That Sound Creepy When Said By John Malkovich

10. "Does this look infected to you?"

9. "I put my jammies on all by myself, mommy!"

8. "You mean I get all these great funk classics on just one compact disc?"

7. "Senator Hillary Clinton"

6. "I can provide references from my last hospital job."

5. "Nougat!"

4. "I love you, Ted Danson."

3. "Your glasses will be ready in about an hour, Ted Danson."

2. "Johnny likes bunnies."

1. "Who wants to be a millionaire?"
 
😀

THE TOP TEN THINGS THAT WILL GET YOU KICKED OUT OF WALT DISNEY WORLD

10 - Driving down beautifully decorated Main Street U.S.A. with Bambi's mother strapped to your front fender

9 - Dumping medical waste into the castle moat

8 - Boarding the monorail at one of the resort hotels and claiming to be Bernard Goetz

7 - Mocking the guy in the Goofy costume for not being able to get a better job

6 - Shouting "I DO believe in Tinkerbell" in the men's room

5 - Chasing after Chip and Dale with a weed-wacker

4 - After biting into sandwich at Disney snack bar, saying "I taste mouse"

3 - Taking a leak off of Splash Mountain

2 - Shutting off controls to Space Mountain while running

1 - Bringing your own mouse suit

 
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