THIS explains it all:
Board of Directors
Alex Akselrod
Director of Pigskin Manufacturer Suing, Quarterback of Recruitment
Lance Alonso
Director of Propaganda and Triplethink
Larry Arnold
Director of Technical Writing (Common Sense Laws, Bylaws, Policies, Commandments, Edicts, Decrees, Directives, Rules, and Regulations)
Robert Duncan
Director of Government Lobbying (Kissing Butt, Waxing Shoes and Bribing Under the Table), Former football player for 9 years