No sex for a year when your in a relationship?

[tec699]

I'm torn on this issue. I truly believe sex should be a part of a relationship, but I do not like putting pressure on women to put out. Let me tell my story. Also, this took place 13 years ago so I'm not even remotely the same person. I've changed for the better.

Back in 1990 I started to date this girl and I fell in love for the first time. We cared about each other and sex was never an issue. We just didn't do it. In a while though the no sex issue was starting to ruin the relationship. The problem was I would always do the oral on the girlfriend but she wouldn't do anything to me. Nothing!! After a year of this I was going nuts. In my opinion, I thought this was selfish on her part.

Do you guys agree?

Anyway, so we briefly broke up during the summer of 1990. I started to go out more and so on. I got back with my ex-gf at the end of the summer. We finally did it. One time and to be honest it was a disappointment. Maybe it was because we waited over a year to have sex? I don't know... but it sucked. She moved down to Florida to pursue a career as a makeup artist. We would talk on the phone until one day I just blew up on her. The relationship was over, done, kaput!!

I found out from a buddy that she moved back home. I gave her a call and she answered. Immediately I started to question her about her new boyfriend that she had just met. She told me that I had my chance at sex and I blew it. She then told me that she and her new boyfriend were having sex on a daily basis and I was a fool for waiting. We talked some more and then she called her mom and said that I was harrasing her on a daily basis.

Would this piss you off guys?

 

[jagec]

Frankly, I'm the wrong guy to ask because I don't believe sex is nearly as big of an issue in a relationship as society makes it out to be.

 

[Kelvrick]

Why'd you go down on her while she wouldn't do anything?

 

[pulse8]

It would piss me off if a girl did that, but I wouldn't wait around a year for things to get better. If you're sexual people and you're not doing sexual things together then they are either happening with someone else or you guys just aren't right for each other.

 

[tec699]

Originally posted by: Kelvrick
Why'd you go down on her while she wouldn't do anything?

It was the heat of the moment. I was just trying to please this girl. She told me that she hated giving oral to guys and everything else that came with it. Also since sex was a non-issue what else were we suspossed to do?

 

[Murphy Durphy]

Originally posted by: tec699
I'm torn on this issue. I truly believe sex should be a part of a relationship, but I do not like putting pressure on women to put out. Let me tell my story. Also, this took place 13 years ago so I'm not even remotely the same person. I've changed for the better.

Back in 1990 I started to date this girl and I fell in love for the first time. We cared about each other and sex was never an issue. We just didn't do it. In a while though the no sex issue was starting to ruin the relationship. The problem was I would always do the oral on the girlfriend but she wouldn't do anything to me. Nothing!! After a year of this I was going nuts. In my opinion, I thought this was selfish on her part.

Do you guys agree?

Anyway, so we briefly broke up during the summer of 1990. I started to go out more and so on. I got back with my ex-gf at the end of the summer. We finally did it. One time and to be honest it was a disappointment. Maybe it was because we waited over a year to have sex? I don't know... but it sucked. She moved down to Florida to pursue a career as a makeup artist. We would talk on the phone until one day I just blew up on her. The relationship was over, done, kaput!!

I found out from a buddy that she moved back home. I gave her a call and she answered. Immediately I started to question her about her new boyfriend that she had just met. She told me that I had my chance at sex and I blew it. She then told me that she and her new boyfriend were having sex on a daily basis and I was a fool for waiting. We talked some more and then she called her mom and said that I was harrasing her on a daily basis.

Would this piss you off guys?

Yeah, but it sounds like she still has bitter feelings. If it was your first time having sex period when you two first did, then of course it was going to be a disappointment! Sex for the first time is always clumsy and not the glamorous experience TV paints it to be. It takes a few times with someone to get it right, to find what they like and how to please each other. I admit the oral selfishness is just lame because I had to deal with that at one point. Chances are though, she was just nervous about a particular aspect of it that she was hesitant to tell you about.

The most important key to any relationship is COMMUNICATION and it seems as though a lack of that caused you two to end things early.

 

[SuperTool]

Yes.
No.

 

[stonecold3169]

Originally posted by: jagec
Frankly, I'm the wrong guy to ask because I don't believe sex is nearly as big of an issue in a relationship as society makes it out to be.

I used to feel like this, and for the most part I still do. However, once you have a very strong emotional basis, the physical side brings something more then just that to the table. I felt exactly this way until my current gf, who I love with everything I have... I think that sex is a natural way of giving a physical interpretation of the things that you just can't say no matter how fluent you are and open. It's just a very bonding experiance.

 

[sash1]

who the fcuk cares, this happened 13 years ago. Let it go, its over, get over it

`K

 

[tec699]

Originally posted by: pulse8
It would piss me off if a girl did that, but I wouldn't wait around a year for things to get better. If you're sexual people and you're not doing sexual things together then they are either happening with someone else or you guys just aren't right for each other.

We were right for each other at the time. From what she told me she got abused in the past from a couple of guys. This one guy who played in a band had sex with her at a party. After it was over he told her to get the f*ck out of his face. She was very upset over this.

Also, she was a very emotional girl. She tried commiting suicide when her boyfriend of 2 years broke up with her. Everything upset this girl.

Of course this was 13 years ago.

 

[Quixfire]

Would this piss you off guys?

Yes

 

[tec699]

Originally posted by: HajikuFlip

Originally posted by: tec699
I'm torn on this issue. I truly believe sex should be a part of a relationship, but I do not like putting pressure on women to put out. Let me tell my story. Also, this took place 13 years ago so I'm not even remotely the same person. I've changed for the better.

Back in 1990 I started to date this girl and I fell in love for the first time. We cared about each other and sex was never an issue. We just didn't do it. In a while though the no sex issue was starting to ruin the relationship. The problem was I would always do the oral on the girlfriend but she wouldn't do anything to me. Nothing!! After a year of this I was going nuts. In my opinion, I thought this was selfish on her part.

Do you guys agree?

Anyway, so we briefly broke up during the summer of 1990. I started to go out more and so on. I got back with my ex-gf at the end of the summer. We finally did it. One time and to be honest it was a disappointment. Maybe it was because we waited over a year to have sex? I don't know... but it sucked. She moved down to Florida to pursue a career as a makeup artist. We would talk on the phone until one day I just blew up on her. The relationship was over, done, kaput!!

I found out from a buddy that she moved back home. I gave her a call and she answered. Immediately I started to question her about her new boyfriend that she had just met. She told me that I had my chance at sex and I blew it. She then told me that she and her new boyfriend were having sex on a daily basis and I was a fool for waiting. We talked some more and then she called her mom and said that I was harrasing her on a daily basis.

Would this piss you off guys?

Yeah, but it sounds like she still has bitter feelings. If it was your first time having sex period when you two first did, then of course it was going to be a disappointment! Sex for the first time is always clumsy and not the glamorous experience TV paints it to be. It takes a few times with someone to get it right, to find what they like and how to please each other. I admit the oral selfishness is just lame because I had to deal with that at one point. Chances are though, she was just nervous about a particular aspect of it that she was hesitant to tell you about.

The most important key to any relationship is COMMUNICATION and it seems as though a lack of that caused you two to end things early.

YES! Communication was non-existent. Well we were still babies at that point. I was only 20 going on 21, and she was only 18 years old. I didn't have the experience to deal with the relationship.

Also, she truly believed in love. She felt that our first sexual encounter was going to be filled with butterflies and roses, etc..

I learned a lot from that relationship. That's for sure.

 

[paulandreas]

Originally posted by: tec699
I'm torn on this issue. I truly believe sex should be a part of a relationship, but I do not like putting pressure on women to put out. Let me tell my story. Also, this took place 13 years ago so I'm not even remotely the same person. I've changed for the better.

Back in 1990 I started to date this girl and I fell in love for the first time. We cared about each other and sex was never an issue. We just didn't do it. In a while though the no sex issue was starting to ruin the relationship. The problem was I would always do the oral on the girlfriend but she wouldn't do anything to me. Nothing!! After a year of this I was going nuts. In my opinion, I thought this was selfish on her part.

Do you guys agree?

Anyway, so we briefly broke up during the summer of 1990. I started to go out more and so on. I got back with my ex-gf at the end of the summer. We finally did it. One time and to be honest it was a disappointment. Maybe it was because we waited over a year to have sex? I don't know... but it sucked. She moved down to Florida to pursue a career as a makeup artist. We would talk on the phone until one day I just blew up on her. The relationship was over, done, kaput!!

I found out from a buddy that she moved back home. I gave her a call and she answered. Immediately I started to question her about her new boyfriend that she had just met. She told me that I had my chance at sex and I blew it. She then told me that she and her new boyfriend were having sex on a daily basis and I was a fool for waiting. We talked some more and then she called her mom and said that I was harrasing her on a daily basis.

Would this piss you off guys?

she dumb

 

[StageLeft]

The problem was I would always do the oral on the girlfriend but she wouldn't do anything to me. Nothing!! After a year of this I was going nuts.

Please do let the door hit her ass on the way out. You weren't 13.

Also, she was a very emotional girl. She tried commiting suicide when her boyfriend of 2 years broke up with her. Everything upset this girl.

Ah, girls like that are not worth time until they've had some real counselling. Way too much crap to put up with.

 

[Geekbabe]

I went 3 yrs without but I was married

 

[Murphy Durphy]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
I went 3 yrs without but I was married

Why?

 

[tec699]

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
I went 3 yrs without but I was married

3 years!!

:shocked:

 

[freegeeks]

Originally posted by: HajikuFlip

Originally posted by: Geekbabe
I went 3 yrs without but I was married

Why?

happens all the time in relationships that are already kaput

a lot of people stay together for years because of kids and stuff like that but don't have sex anymore

 

[MailBoxHead]

If she's willing to have you eat the bush but think you're too dirty, it really was time to pack up and leave.

 

[dolph]

why are you torn on this issue 13 years after it's finished?

 

[Bitek]

You were a fool and she was selfish.

Yes it would be annoying.

 

[Stark]

so do you obsess over other things from your past, or just this girl?

oh, and pics?

 

[dirtboy]

Originally posted by: tec699Everything upset this girl.

Her problem wasn't you or sex; it is that she had problems. My ex-wife was kinda like that. Before marriage she wanted sex, the day we got married she no longer wanted to do it. She had issues.

I think sex is an important part of a relationship and if a woman is not interested in you sexually, she needs to go.

 

[luvya]

This story sucks!

 

[Amorphus]

If sex is what it takes for you to keep a relationship together, you're on the fast track to the 50% statistic.

A relationship is based off of trust, mutual emotional intimacy, love, affection, and understanding. Not on whether or not you get to "tap dat booty thang". :roll: