need some funny fortune cookie sayings

[Lola]

i am making some fortune cookies for a party this weekend and i want to make my own fortunes and i need some great fortunes/sayings.

stuff like "you're arse will grow large in the future"
just funny stuff like that... any ideas would be great!

 

[LeetViet]

"I see hard things in your future"

 

[n0cmonkey]

That wasn't chicken.

 

[Lola]

keep going.... these are gonna be for an adult party so they can be a little "mature" but please dont get this thread locked!!!

 

[Ryan]

Man with itchy butt, wake up with smelly fingers.......

 

[Dr. Detroit]

Man with slutty sister makes many friends

 

[Shlong]

Your Special, Have a cookie.

 

[LOLyourFace]

'How was the tossed salad?'

 

[Gurck]

Man who put cream in tart, not necessarily baker

 

[Old School]

He who go through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

or

Baseball is very wrong - Man with four balls cannot walk.

 

[Mojoed]

May rabid weasels bite you in many unpleasant places.

 

[Old School]

Girl who wear thong bikini is high on crack

 

[Vortex22]

http://www.badcookie.com/

 

[Lola]

thats guys!! these are great!

 

[LeetViet]

"Those aren't your kids."