Need Help With Resume...calling all ATOT members

[Svnla]

Ok, my resume is below, only the name and company names/city are faked. Come and take a look and see if you see any grammar errors or suggestions. Thanks yall.

Edit: It is exactly one page in Word format. The look of the resume is ok, just the grammar and wording are worry me.
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Phone: (123) 555-5555
Email: 555@yahoo.com

FIRST NAME LAST NAME

OBJECTIVE: To join a challenging and growing company which will enable use of my knowledge and extensive hand-on experience.

EXPERIENCE: 2003 to Present Large Entertaintment Company Large City, LA
Finance Lead Auditor/IT Support Specialist
Auditing finance documents and revenue reports for compliance with internal control standards and company policies. Responsible for presentation of daily operating statements and distribution to senior management. Preparing discrepancy reports and investigating variances. Providing technical support for various software and hardware platforms. Analyzing user problems and performing troubleshooting.

2001 to 2002 Government Large city, LA
Automation Specialist
Provided problem solving, technical service requests, systems and databases administration. Responsible for multiple project management, user training and support. Analyzed trouble reports and audited computer and equipment inventory.

1993 to 2001 Large Automotive company Large city, LA
Systems Analyst/QS-9000 Quality Systems Administrator/Materials Coordinator
Responsible for the planning and development of technology direction to satisfy Just-In-Time (JIT) automotive business operations requirements. Designed, developed, upgraded and implemented computer applications in the mainframe and PC environment. Analyzed and developed new systems and processes to improve manufacturing workflow and quality process. Handled QS-9000 and TQM quality systems requirements and audits.
Responsible for all quality specs, data, and tests. Implemented inventory control, tracking methods, and freight costs reduction. Processed computer inquiries for Just-In-Time (JIT) inventory and Materials Requirement Planning (MRP) systems. Audited all materials requirement and purchasing reports.

EDUCATION: Major: Quantitated Business Management
Minor: Computer Science
Louisiana State University
Bachelor of Science (BS) degree awarded in December 2000
Master of Business Administration (MBA) degree awarded in May 2004
HONORS Dean?s List, member of MBA Association, member of ACM (Association for Computing
AND ACTIVITIES: Machinery), member of DPMA (Data Processing Management Association)

COMPUTER SKILLS:
Languages: COBOL, C/C+, HTML, ASSEMBLY, PASCAL, FORTRAN, BASIC
Hardwares: IBM and Compaq/Digital mainframes and mid ranges. IBM-PC and compatibles, network hubs and routers, printers and scanners
Softwares: MS Office (Word, Excel, Access, PowerPoint, Project, Publisher), Windows 9X/2000/XP, Lotus Notes, Lotus Suites, Adobe Acrobat, Novell Netware, LAN, WAN, TCP/IP, UNIX, EDI, VAX/VMS, PICK, CASE tools, SPC, SAS, Track It, Barcode, SDS, FastCash, Watson Scheduler, Monarch
Attended seminars and classes for MS Office, Lotus Notes, Windows 2000/XP

REFERENCES: Available upon request

 

[Zanix]

Font, text size, layout... these things are essential. The content is also important, obviously but, I think we're going to need a word document as well as this post.

Edit: depending on the size of the company, on average each resume will get a few seconds glance over. You must maximize that time.

Edit2: I think the objective lines in resumes are usually just space wasters. YMMV, but I'd suggest cutting it. Oh also, it's essential that this fits on one page. Two pages = "NEXT!"

Edit3: "ACTIVITIES: Machinery), member of DPMA " got a lone ) hanging out there.

 

[Svnla]

Originally posted by: Zanix
Font, text size, layout... these things are essential. The content is also important, obviously but, I think we're going to need a word document as well as this post.

Edit: depending on the size of the company, on average each resume will get a few seconds glance over. You must maximize that time.

The font/text size/layout are good. I only concern about grammar/wording and such. I am sending this resume for a large company next week. Just want to be sure there is zero mistake.

 

[Zanix]

Originally posted by: Svnla

Originally posted by: Zanix
Font, text size, layout... these things are essential. The content is also important, obviously but, I think we're going to need a word document as well as this post.

Edit: depending on the size of the company, on average each resume will get a few seconds glance over. You must maximize that time.

The font/text size/layout are good. I only concern about grammar/wording and such. I am sending this resume for a large company next week. Just want to be sure there is zero mistake.

Oh alright then. I'm getting excited. I'll calm down.

 

[Patt]

Computer skills:

Hardwares and Softwares ... should be singular.

 

[ericb]

Drop the references available upon request...it's a space filler and assumed.

Drop any computer skills that don't directly relate to the job you're applying for.

Where are the details in the descriptions? What systems did you support? Did you bring tangible benefits to the company like saved company 10k by auditing revenue documents?

Also doesn't look good that your oldest job listed has twice the description of the newest.

Consider changing objective to professional summary. Change it to describe what you will bring to the company and not want you want the company to do for you. Something like: Use my knowledge and extensive hand-on experience to meet challenges and help the company move towards the top of it's field. Etc, etc.

 

[pclstyle]

Originally posted by: ericb
Drop the references available upon request...it's a space filler and assumed.

Drop any computer skills that don't directly relate to the job you're applying for.

Where are the details in the descriptions? What systems did you support? Did you bring tangible benefits to the company like saved company 10k by auditing revenue documents?

Also doesn't look good that your oldest job listed has twice the description of the newest.

Consider changing objective to professional summary. Change it to describe what you will bring to the company and not want you want the company to do for you. Something like: Use my knowledge and extensive hand-on experience to meet challenges and help the company move towards the top of it's field. Etc, etc.

excellent

 

[bootymac]

Originally posted by: ericb
Drop the references available upon request...it's a space filler and assumed.

Drop any computer skills that don't directly relate to the job you're applying for.

Where are the details in the descriptions? What systems did you support? Did you bring tangible benefits to the company like saved company 10k by auditing revenue documents?

Also doesn't look good that your oldest job listed has twice the description of the newest.

Consider changing objective to professional summary. Change it to describe what you will bring to the company and not want you want the company to do for you. Something like: Use my knowledge and extensive hand-on experience to meet challenges and help the company move towards the top of it's field. Etc, etc.

Good touch

 

[JDMnAR1]

Originally posted by: Patt
Computer skills:

Hardwares and Softwares ... should be singular.

...and

Originally posted by: Svnla
extensive hand-on experience

should be plural (unless of course you are an amputee).

 

[Svnla]

Thanks for all the help.

Ericb, good suggestion, I will change it as you suggested.

 

[cchen]

you should use bullet points for your experience instead of putting paragraphs. makes it more concise and easier to read

 

[Don Vito Corleone]

Make sure that you use active verb clauses in your Experience bullets, and focus on the RESULTS of your action. E.g., rather than "Responsible for presentation of daily operating statements and distribution to senior management," say something like "Created and distributed daily operating statements to senior managers, reducing response time to customer issues by 30%."

The Objective section is critical, no matter what anyone else says. If possible it's good to also make a short (4-5 bullets) Highlights of Qualifications section.

I'd suggest that given your level of education, the jobs you're seeking will expect a 2-page resume. Make sure you use that space effectively, and that there's plenty of blank space to highlight your strengths.

 

[axelfox]

Hey, I tried to call you, but all I got was somebody tell me the time.

 

[OulOat]

Bullets bullets bullets. No one likes reading paragraphs when a few bullets will do. Read this (my point is number 8)

 

[Svnla]

Thanks for the suggestion about bullets.