Need advice

[DominionSeraph]

seriously, this isn't normal, someone has introduced something into this kids life in a bad way

Internet introduces everyone to sex at an early age now.

 

[Wyndru]

The lack of parental involvement here feels like a systemic problem.

Seriously, did I miss it? I thought I read all of the posts. Are the parents in the picture? And how old is the sister?

 

[mnewsham]

Seriously, did I miss it? I thought I read all of the posts. Are the parents in the picture? And how old is the sister?

parents are out of the picture as said in i think the 8th post. Girlfriend is 19, sister is 11.

 

[Ronstang]

Probably a good idea to do something. The little bastard next door used to be online when he was young and looking at penises, according to his older brother. Always thought he was gay but when he ass raped the 5 year old down the street when he was 16 it kind of removed all doubt.

 

[AreaCode707]

parents are out of the picture as said in i think the 8th post. Girlfriend is 19, sister is 11.

Sounds like little sis feels lacking in attention and is starting to look for it from boys, learning to use her sexuality to get focus on her. Tough spot for a kid to be in, very hard to substitute anything in for parents.

 

[mnewsham]

Sounds like little sis feels lacking in attention and is starting to look for it from boys, learning to use her sexuality to get focus on her. Tough spot for a kid to be in, very hard to substitute anything in for parents.

yup that was my thought too.

 

[lxskllr]

Did you poke around the internet history? There might be something interesting there. You might also want to consider OpenDNS. You can't patrol the world, but you can at least lock things down a bit in your(GFs) house.

 

[waggy]

10? Seriously?

Of the dozen or so 10 year old girls that my wife and I know, none are anywhere close to puberty.

my daughter is 9. I don't see her hitting puberty for a few more years. most of her friends are the same.

my wife's little sister hit early. when she was 12 she looked 18. while she didn't dress or wear makeup she had developed early. At 16 she could easily pass as a college student. Not only physically but mentally. her IQ is high and she has been taking honors class's as a sophomore.

 

[mnewsham]

Did you poke around the internet history? There might be something interesting there. You might also want to consider OpenDNS. You can't patrol the world, but you can at least lock things down a bit in your(GFs) house.

yup, am consider OpenDNS, and others.

 

[911paramedic]

I am soooo glad the information superhighway and all this tech wasn't around when I was going through puberty, omg. Polaroids were just about to hit the market back then, that would be the extent of it.

 

[Mr. Lennon]

Uncle is a social worker and specializes in abuse cases, i dont think this is it, but i will of course make sure it isnt this!

Read up on Ted Haggard.

Molesters are almost always family members or friends.

Be extremely sensitive about this. The last thing you want is for her to feel that she can't confide in her sister.

 

[Kadarin]

Everyone knows that at the age of 11 all girls have ZERO interest in sex whatsoever. Therefore, any kind of sexual behavior in such a girl is clearly a sign of mental disorder either innate or inspired by some act of molestation. The correct response your g/f should give is to completely freak out and yell at her sister, engage the local authorities and news media, and force the sister to go to some religious indoctrination given by nuns who hit her with rulers for even thinking that anything sexual could at all be anything but sinful, immoral, and disgusting.

In fact, the sister should be prevented from having any exposure to the internet, television (excepting shows that are approved by the local religious clergy), movies, and all forms of entertainment. She should also be covered in a burqa.

SHE MUST BE PROTECTED FROM FILTH AND SIN AT ALL COSTS!

 

[waggy]

Everyone knows that at the age of 11 all girls have ZERO interest in sex whatsoever. Therefore, any kind of sexual behavior in such a girl is clearly a sign of mental disorder either innate or inspired by some act of molestation. The correct response your g/f should give is to completely freak out and yell at her sister, engage the local authorities and news media, and force the sister to go to some religious indoctrination given by nuns who hit her with rulers for even thinking that anything sexual could at all be anything but sinful, immoral, and disgusting.

In fact, the sister should be prevented from having any exposure to the internet, television (excepting shows that are approved by the local religious clergy), movies, and all forms of entertainment. She should also be covered in a burqa.

SHE MUST BE PROTECTED FROM FILTH AND SIN AT ALL COSTS!

/this

lord knows girls i dated didn't want sex until i was 18

 

[SMOGZINN]

Wow, this is a super hard issue for any parent to address, much less a 19yo.

The problem is that almost no matter what you do you are going to leave the impression that sex is bad, because our laws are criminalizing children for being curious about sex and using the technology that they grew up with in the same ways they are used to. They are doing the same things they are used to only now with sexual implications and now it is suddenly very bad. For a child that does not really understand the implications of sex that sends the clear message that sex is bad.

Yet what she is doing could very easily destroy several peoples lives, including hers. So the ban hammer must to come down.

I read that she has already had a conversation and decided on a course of action, good for her.
The only other thing I would recommend it running Boot and Nuke on that laptop just in case.

 

[theprodigalrebel]

I am not sure how so many people made the 'she may have a history of abuse' connection. I know I started masturbating before hitting puberty and I am definitely not the only person I know who started early (as in before puberty).

Now I didn't make a video at that age, probably because I didn't have a camera. Well, we did have a camera but this was in the era of 8mm tapes and I wasn't going to buy a video capture card (with my non-existent money) to archive that shit digitally. But if I had a DV camera (or cameraphone), I can totally see myself doing it. Even if the reason was, "Hmm, I wonder what I look like naked on camera?"

In the OP's situation, I would first think of two scenarios:
1) Kid was horny, bored and wondered if they would look good on camera but never intended it to be seen by anyone. Her behavior is stupid because unlike older users, she probably doesn't know about encryption. After all, her sister DID stumble across it. This kind of stupid can be remedied with relative ease.

2) Kid was trying to make a video meant to be seen by someone (guy from school? Internet stranger? A whole forum who may have now posted it on dozens of rapidshare-type sites?)

Scenario Two is what I would be worried about and I sincerely hope that is NOT what happened with the girl in the OP.

 

[Dr. Zaus]

parents are out of the picture as said in i think the 8th post. Girlfriend is 19, sister is 11.

It's hard being a teen raising your siblings... good man for supporting her.

Is the 19 year old a slut teaching this shit to her sister/daughter? Not a troll! You must seriously consider how your own actions impact those of your children.

 

[mnewsham]

It's hard being a teen raising your siblings... good man for supporting her.

Is the 19 year old a slut teaching this shit to her sister/daughter? Not a troll! You must seriously consider how your own actions impact those of your children.

Lol i understand the position you are coming from, but no she isnt a slut or anything, i was her first (awww blah blah romance) we dont do anything naughty around the house or around her. Keep PDA to a minimum, holding hands, hugging, light kissing, no long kisses or making out etc. Hell i dont think we have even EVER done it at her place.

 

[ShawnD1]

I disagree with the immediate hard line. You'll scare her into never talking about these things, and she'll just think "you don't understand" her.

:thumbsup:
Being a dick about stuff is the easiest way to drive people away.

I am not sure how so many people made the 'she may have a history of abuse' connection. I know I started masturbating before hitting puberty and I am definitely not the only person I know who started early (as in before puberty).

American Culture ftw. Any woman who enjoys sex has obviously been molested at some point. There's no possible way that a healthy female could enjoy or be interested in sex. See JulesMaximum's sig.

edit:
Digital cameras were after my time but I totally took pics of my own junk back in the day. It was funny as hell to pick up pictures from the store and it's full of stuff like my dong on a slice of bread, my dong on a rock, my dong on a table. Some guy was paid money to look at my dong. That was exciting and god damn hilarious.

 

[AreaCode707]

I would bet this is less about sex than looks and self esteem.

<---girl

 

[Rastus]

Just watch the drama unfold. It's your girlfriend's sister. That's not close enough for you to putting your two cents in unless specifically asked. All you would do is make enemies by trying to butt in.

 

[DirkGently1]

Point your Girlfriend towards some parental control software and then leave it at that.

 

[Wyndru]

parents are out of the picture as said in i think the 8th post. Girlfriend is 19, sister is 11.

Sorry about that, I don't know how I missed that post.

That is a really sad situation. Good luck, I hope your GF and her uncle can keep her moving in a good direction through these tough ages.