Mystery: Why don't men get bloated?

ahenkel

Diamond Member
Jan 11, 2009
5,359
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I was pretty bloated today I think I farted for 6 minutes straight. I felt like I needed a nap.
 

AMCRambler

Diamond Member
Jan 23, 2001
7,701
26
91
Ate a taco salad and a volcano taco from taco bell last night. Felt bloated and gassy all mrning but couldnt fart or crap. Finally at 3pm i took a massive pudding shit and felt soooo much better.
 

Crono

Lifer
Aug 8, 2001
23,720
1,501
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Uh we do, it's bloating from food.

We don't get menstrual bloating, though, if this thread is inspired by Midol or something. At least I don't... I don't know about some of you weirdos :D
 
Feb 6, 2007
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Men don't get bloated if they avoid beer and fast food or beans... But if you do that, you aren't a real man. Ergo, if you don't get bloated, your man card is revoked.
 

AznAnarchy99

Lifer
Dec 6, 2004
14,705
117
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I get bloated especially after beer and food. It sucks because I have abs and it looks like this

15_ssf4blog01.jpg
 
May 11, 2008
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Some men do not get bloated because :
Because we actually enjoy our food and do not feel guilty about it after eating.
Because we know when to stop eating, treasuring the taste and joy while not over eating. This also ensures that the food still tastes great the next time. And allows for some men to eat the same dish for 2 days in a row without complaining. And prevents becoming over weight.
Because we do not have fluctuating hormone levels that makes us retain fluid or experience abdomen wide inflammation.

Because we fart as hell at the toilet.
I farted once so loud and long in the toilet, that i am sure i heard my neighbor through the common ventilation shaft : "Mother of God" in spanish... :biggrin:
 
May 11, 2008
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Imagine sitting in a restaurant at a table close to the restroom...

"Always seek a table away form the restroom in a restaurant !"
That should be a text on a Chinese fortune cookie.
 

shocksyde

Diamond Member
Jun 16, 2001
5,539
0
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If I eat something really salty I feel bloated for a while afterwards.

That reminds me... Need to pick of some Manpons on the way home.
 

lozina

Lifer
Sep 10, 2001
11,709
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I get bloated sometimes especially after big feasts. Those are the times I gotta loosen my belt a few notches! The worst is when it is a feast with alot of people and I cant get up to 'relieve' myself often. Then I gotta hold in the gases and that's the worst...