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My Wagon Can Beat Your Porsche!

Zim Hosein

Zim Hosein

Super Moderator | Elite Member
Super Moderator
The E55 AMG?A station wagon that gets to the grocery store before you do

Some of my fellow editors hold the station wagon in special contempt, and it's true that the basic wagon is sexy like elastic-waistband pants. But I like the wagon because it is a car, not a car pretending to be an after-school bus (i.e., a minivan) or a truck pretending to be a Bradley Fighting Vehicle (any full-size SUV).

But what is Mercedes's E55 AMG wagon? (AMG is Mercedes's in-house unit that tricks out basic Benzes with monster engines and other performance equipment. You find souped-up AMGs up and down the company's model line.) At 14 mpg city on premium gas, the E55 ain't fuel-efficient, and an 83-grand sticker makes it an exotic that only a few appreciative Americans will probably buy. In short, it's Superwagon. Outwardly handsome but still basically resembling a big elastic-waistband-pants sort of car, this machine is so muscular, so fast, so comfortable and so practical that it's like Clark Kent's own private joke.

The E-class AMG wagon packs a 469-horse 332-cubic-inch supercharged V8 and has brake discs the size of manhole covers. Try 0 to 60 in the sub-five-seconds zone and 70-to-0 braking sub-175 feet (the latter according to Car and Driver). These are Porsche/'Vette/Ferrari numbers, in a station wagon. They don't mean much, though, until you feel this grocery-hauler lunge past 60 in second gear, still a good way below the redline, and then slow down under hard braking as if it's being sucked to a halt by a black hole in the pavement. I did that up and down a backcountry road in North Carolina, laughing, then took it to 130 before remembering to be sensible (an electronic speed governor kicks in at 155, if you happen to live near the salt flats). Cornering on the Conti ZR-18 tires was equally fierce, with assorted electronic stabilizing systems making you feel like a better driver than you are.

The transmission is a five-speed automatic with steering-wheel-mounted manual-shifting buttons. The AMG seats, in ?active? mode, inflate right or left to bolster your body during cornering?it's like someone pressing your sides with boxing gloves?and there's an odd slow-motion back-massage mode as well. The payoff is that over a 13-hour road trip of the sort that wagons were meant for, I was never stiff or uncomfortable. Rear seats split and fold down for massive storage increase. The sound system is adequate but not sensational. Leather, wood and handsome dials adorn the cockpit; controls are logically configured; cruise control is precise; and the data-screen interface is intuitive, although a touchscreen would be nice. Sure, this car still looks like a wagon because it is a wagon?as interpreted by the AMG engineers on Krypton.

Specs
2006 E55 AMG Wagon
Price: $82,600
Engine: AMG-built 5.5-liter aluminum V8, producing 469 hp at 6,100 rpm and 516 pound-feet of torque Performance: 0?60 in 4.5 seconds; 155 mph (electronically limited) top speed
Click to expand...

My Wagon Can Beat Your Porsche! 😎

 
Cool its a freaking hearse just like the dodge charger! The only use for it is to get to the cemetary faster. SWEET!
 
Originally posted by: Cantaloupe
Cool its a freaking hearse just like the dodge charger! The only use for it is to get to the cemetary faster. SWEET!
Click to expand...

WWYBYWB? 😕
 
Originally posted by: Zim Hosein
The E55 AMG?A station wagon that gets to the grocery store before you do

Some of my fellow editors hold the station wagon in special contempt, and it's true that the basic wagon is sexy like elastic-waistband pants. But I like the wagon because it is a car, not a car pretending to be an after-school bus (i.e., a minivan) or a truck pretending to be a Bradley Fighting Vehicle (any full-size SUV).

But what is Mercedes's E55 AMG wagon? (AMG is Mercedes's in-house unit that tricks out basic Benzes with monster engines and other performance equipment. You find souped-up AMGs up and down the company's model line.) At 14 mpg city on premium gas, the E55 ain't fuel-efficient, and an 83-grand sticker makes it an exotic that only a few appreciative Americans will probably buy. In short, it's Superwagon. Outwardly handsome but still basically resembling a big elastic-waistband-pants sort of car, this machine is so muscular, so fast, so comfortable and so practical that it's like Clark Kent's own private joke.

The E-class AMG wagon packs a 469-horse 332-cubic-inch supercharged V8 and has brake discs the size of manhole covers. Try 0 to 60 in the sub-five-seconds zone and 70-to-0 braking sub-175 feet (the latter according to Car and Driver). These are Porsche/'Vette/Ferrari numbers, in a station wagon. They don't mean much, though, until you feel this grocery-hauler lunge past 60 in second gear, still a good way below the redline, and then slow down under hard braking as if it's being sucked to a halt by a black hole in the pavement. I did that up and down a backcountry road in North Carolina, laughing, then took it to 130 before remembering to be sensible (an electronic speed governor kicks in at 155, if you happen to live near the salt flats). Cornering on the Conti ZR-18 tires was equally fierce, with assorted electronic stabilizing systems making you feel like a better driver than you are.

The transmission is a five-speed automatic with steering-wheel-mounted manual-shifting buttons. The AMG seats, in ?active? mode, inflate right or left to bolster your body during cornering?it's like someone pressing your sides with boxing gloves?and there's an odd slow-motion back-massage mode as well. The payoff is that over a 13-hour road trip of the sort that wagons were meant for, I was never stiff or uncomfortable. Rear seats split and fold down for massive storage increase. The sound system is adequate but not sensational. Leather, wood and handsome dials adorn the cockpit; controls are logically configured; cruise control is precise; and the data-screen interface is intuitive, although a touchscreen would be nice. Sure, this car still looks like a wagon because it is a wagon?as interpreted by the AMG engineers on Krypton.

Specs
2006 E55 AMG Wagon
Price: $82,600
Engine: AMG-built 5.5-liter aluminum V8, producing 469 hp at 6,100 rpm and 516 pound-feet of torque Performance: 0?60 in 4.5 seconds; 155 mph (electronically limited) top speed
Click to expand...

My Wagon Can Beat Your Porsche! 😎
Click to expand...

Okay, I know I can't be the ONLY person that actually thinks elastic-waistband pants (in particular, sweatpants) are hawt... Am I?
 
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*

That is one serious motor though.
 
Originally posted by: spidey07
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*
Click to expand...

You++ for remembering that thread 😛
 
Originally posted by: spidey07
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*

That is one serious motor though.
Click to expand...

:thumbsup: :laugh:
 
Originally posted by: EyeMWing
Originally posted by: spidey07
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*
Click to expand...

You++ for remembering that thread 😛
Click to expand...

I just got such a kick out of somebody saying "merecedes aren't fast"
😛
 
Originally posted by: vi_edit
The AMG seats, in ?active? mode, inflate right or left to bolster your body during cornering?it's like someone pressing your sides with boxing gloves
Click to expand...

Woah!
Click to expand...

It actually works. It's weird feeling though. You can get this option on normal E-class vehicles as well.
 
Originally posted by: spidey07
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*

That is one serious motor though.
Click to expand...

dragstrip: AMG SL65 vs the world

link
 
Originally posted by: spidey07
Originally posted by: EyeMWing
Originally posted by: spidey07
Wait. I thought mercedes were old people cars and weren't fast?

The evo offers class and refinement and unmatched performence for much less.

*tounge in cheek*
Click to expand...

You++ for remembering that thread 😛
Click to expand...

I just got such a kick out of somebody saying "merecedes aren't fast"
😛
Click to expand...

shameless plug: i started that thread 🙂

 
um... still, bring both car to the club, the hot chic is not gonna get into your wagon no matter how fast it is.. she'll be giving you head in the porsche..
 
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