Dear Detective Billings,
Although I may not be the best candidate, I would like to thank you for taking your valuable time to interview me. Who knows how badly I screwed up? I mean, it's not like I go interview for fabulous positions every day. Hell, the last job I had was at McDonalds. I thought I'd have that job forever, but alas, I got tossed out for hiding crack in the french fries and kicking up some extra profit on the down-low. But I like to look at the positive side of situations like these, ya know? So hey, any time you're in the hood, just gimme a holler and we'll kick it up at Kilcho's Tavern. Oh, and a good word for that spot on the force, yo. Sorry about busting your ink pen on the desk -- nervous habit.
Sincerely,
Jobless in Seattle