My office must be moving near the speed of light
- Thread starter Fritzo
- Start date
- Jan 3, 2001
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[SIZE=-1][/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1][/SIZE]
[SIZE=-1]Why did the chicken cross the Mobius strip?
To get to the same side.[/SIZE]
I'm sorry to inform you but your clocks are in your same reference frame. 
Now the ones in the other office well maybe.
Now the ones in the other office well maybe.
JohnCU
Banned
- Dec 9, 2000
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DrPizza
Administrator Elite Member Goat Whisperer
Imagining for a moment that you've somehow managed to measure time in some frame of reference other than your own, and that 2 hours in that frame has only been 9 minutes in your frame, then according to my calculations, you're moving at 99.71835337589565% of the speed of light = ~ 185757.73891754885 miles per second or 298948.1026627235 kilometers per second.
(That's in relation to my reference frame where I have the clock.)
(That's in relation to my reference frame where I have the clock.)
dainthomas
Lifer
- Dec 7, 2004
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Sea Moose
Diamond Member
- May 12, 2009
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You don't.
Can't travel at the speed of light and all.
Lol, your new.
I was referencing a thread from old atot
http://forums.anandtech.com/showthr...t+happens+grain+sand+hits+you+the+speed+light
Evadman
Administrator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
- Feb 18, 2001
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One evening, with his charge at full capacity, Micro Farad decided to get a cute coil to discharge him. He went to the Magnet Bar to pick up a chip called Millie Amp. He caught her out back trying self induction; fortunately, she had not damaged her solenoid. The two took off on his megacycle and rode across the Wheatstone Bridge into a magnetic field, next to a flowing current , to watch the sine waves.
Micro Farad was very much stimulated by Millie's characteristic curve. Being attractive himself, he soon had her field fully excited. He set her on the ground potential, raised his frequency, lowered her resistance, and pulled out his high voltage probe. When he inserted it in parallel, he short-circuited her shunt. Fully excited, Millie cried out, "ohm, ohm, give me mho". As he increased his tube to maximum output, her coil vibrated from the current flow. It did not take long for her shunt to reach maximum heat. Now with the excessive current shortening her shunt, Micro's capacity rapidly discharged – every electron was drained off. But that was not the end of it. Indeed, they fluxed all night, tried various connections and hookings until his bar magnet weakened, and he could no longer generate enough voltage to sustain his collapsing field. With his battery fully discharged, Micro was unable to excite his tickler, so they went home. A few weeks later, they were merged forever and oscillated happily ever after.
Micro Farad was very much stimulated by Millie's characteristic curve. Being attractive himself, he soon had her field fully excited. He set her on the ground potential, raised his frequency, lowered her resistance, and pulled out his high voltage probe. When he inserted it in parallel, he short-circuited her shunt. Fully excited, Millie cried out, "ohm, ohm, give me mho". As he increased his tube to maximum output, her coil vibrated from the current flow. It did not take long for her shunt to reach maximum heat. Now with the excessive current shortening her shunt, Micro's capacity rapidly discharged – every electron was drained off. But that was not the end of it. Indeed, they fluxed all night, tried various connections and hookings until his bar magnet weakened, and he could no longer generate enough voltage to sustain his collapsing field. With his battery fully discharged, Micro was unable to excite his tickler, so they went home. A few weeks later, they were merged forever and oscillated happily ever after.
JohnCU
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Locut0s
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<puts nerd hat on> If you were moving at near the speed of light you wouldn't notice the time dilation in your own reference frame but only as measured against a different frame.<takes nerd hat off>
irishScott
Lifer
- Oct 10, 2006
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Evadman
Administrator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
- Feb 18, 2001
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There is this farmer who is having problems with his chickens. All of the sudden, they are all getting very sick and he doesn't know what is wrong with them. After trying all conventional means, he calls a biologist, a chemist, and a physicist to see if they can figure out what is wrong. So the biologist looks at the chickens, examines them a bit, and says he has no clue what could be wrong with them. Then the chemist takes some tests and makes some measurements, but he can't come to any conclusions either. So the physicist tries. He stands there and looks at the chickens for a long time without touching them or anything. Then all of the sudden he starts scribbling away in a notebook. Finally, after several gruesome calculations, he exclaims, 'I've got it! But it only works for spherical chickens in a vacuum.'
Q: How were three graduate physics students able to demonstrated that a human could travel faster than light?
A: The three students went to a store and bought a stop watch and a candle. Then, they proceeded to a high school track field. The first student lit the candle and began to walk around the track. The second student waited a while and then ran after the first student. The third student worked the stop watch because physics experiments require precise measurements. When the second student rounded the track and came in first, the three students concluded that humans could travel faster than light.
Once all the scientists die and go to heaven. They decide to play hide-n-seek. Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has the den. He is supposed to count upto 100 and then start searching. Everyone starts hiding except Newton.
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in it, right in front of Einstein.
Einsteins counting ....97,98,99,100, opens his eyes and finds Newton standing in front. Einstein says "Newtons out, Newton's out."
Newton denies and says I am not out. He claims that he is not Newton. Newton says, "I am standing in a square of area 1m square. That means I am Newton per meter square. Hence I am Pascal."
Q: How were three graduate physics students able to demonstrated that a human could travel faster than light?
A: The three students went to a store and bought a stop watch and a candle. Then, they proceeded to a high school track field. The first student lit the candle and began to walk around the track. The second student waited a while and then ran after the first student. The third student worked the stop watch because physics experiments require precise measurements. When the second student rounded the track and came in first, the three students concluded that humans could travel faster than light.
Once all the scientists die and go to heaven. They decide to play hide-n-seek. Unfortunately Einstein is the one who has the den. He is supposed to count upto 100 and then start searching. Everyone starts hiding except Newton.
Newton just draws a square of 1 meter and stands in it, right in front of Einstein.
Einsteins counting ....97,98,99,100, opens his eyes and finds Newton standing in front. Einstein says "Newtons out, Newton's out."
Newton denies and says I am not out. He claims that he is not Newton. Newton says, "I am standing in a square of area 1m square. That means I am Newton per meter square. Hence I am Pascal."
PJABBER
Diamond Member
- Feb 8, 2001
- 4,822
- 0
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A neutron walks into a bar; he asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"The bartender looks at him, and says "For you, no charge."
Two atoms bump into each other. One says "I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?", to which the first replies, "I'm positive."
Old physicists don't die; their wave functions go to zero as time goes to infinity.
Two atoms bump into each other. One says "I think I lost an electron!" The other asks, "Are you sure?", to which the first replies, "I'm positive."
Old physicists don't die; their wave functions go to zero as time goes to infinity.
Sea Moose
Diamond Member
- May 12, 2009
- 6,933
- 7
- 76
Evadman
Administrator Emeritus<br>Elite Member
- Feb 18, 2001
- 30,990
- 5
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Some time ago I received a call from a colleague who asked if I would
be the referee on the grading of an examination question. He was about
to give a student a zero for his answer to a physics question, while
the student claimed he should receive a perfect score and would if the
system were not set up against the student: The instructor and the
student agreed to submit this to an impartial arbiter, and I was
selected.
I went to my colleague's office and read the examination question:
"Show how it is possible to determine the height of a tall building
with the aid of a barometer."
The student had answered: "Take a barometer to the top of the
building, attach a long rope to it, lower the barometer to the street
and then bring it up, measuring the length of the rope. The length of
the rope is the height of the building."
I pointed out that the student really had a strong case for full
credit since he had answered the question completely and correctly. On
the other hand, if full credit was given, it could well contribute to
a high grade for the student in his physics course. A high grade is
supposed to certify competence in physics, but the answer did not
confirm this. I suggested that the student have another try at
answering the question I was not surprised that my colleague agreed,
but I was surprised that the student did.
I gave the student six minutes to answer the question with the warning
that the answer should show some knowledge of physics. At the end of
five minutes, he had not written anything. I asked if he wished to
give up, but he said no. He had many answers to this problem; he was
just thinking of the best one. I excused myself for interrupting him
and asked him to please go on. In the next minute he dashed off his
answer which read:
"Take the barometer to the top of the building and lean over the edge
of the roof. Drop that barometer, timing its fall with a stopwatch.
Then using the formula S = ½at², calculate the height of the building.
At this point I asked my colleague if he would give up. He conceded,
and I gave the student almost full credit.
In leaving my colleague's office, I recalled that the student had said
he had many other answers to the problem, so I asked him what they
were. "Oh yes," said the student. "There are a great many ways of
getting the height of a tall building with a barometer. For example,
you could take the barometer out on a sunny day and measure the height
of the barometer and the length of its shadow, and the length of the
shadow of the building and by the use of a simple proportion,
determine the height of the building."
"Fine," I asked. "And the others?"
"Yes," said the student. "There is a very basic measurement method
that you will like. In this method you take the barometer and begin to
walk up the stairs. As you climb the stairs, you mark off the length
of the barometer along the wa]l. You then count the number of marks,
and this will give you the height of the building in barometer units.
A very direct method."
"Of course, if you want a more sophisticated method, you can tie the
barometer to the end of a string, swing it as a pendulum, and
determine the value of `g' at the street level and at the top of the
building. From the difference of the two values of `g' the height of
the building can be calculated."
Finally, he concluded, there are many other ways of solving the
problem. "Probably the best," he said, "is to take the barometer to
the basement and knock on the superintendent's door. When the
superintendent answers, you speak to him as follows: "Mr.
Superintendent, here I have a fine barometer. If you tell me the
height of this building, I will give you this barometer."
At this point I asked the student if he really did know the
conventional answer to this question. He admitted that he did, said
that he was fed up with high school and college instructors trying to
teach him how to think, using the "scientific method," and to explore
the deep inner logic of the subject in a pedantic way, as is often
done in the new mathematics, rather than teaching him the structure of
the subject. With this in mind, he decided to revive scholasticism as
an academic lark to challenge the Sputnik-panicked classrooms of
America.
be the referee on the grading of an examination question. He was about
to give a student a zero for his answer to a physics question, while
the student claimed he should receive a perfect score and would if the
system were not set up against the student: The instructor and the
student agreed to submit this to an impartial arbiter, and I was
selected.
I went to my colleague's office and read the examination question:
"Show how it is possible to determine the height of a tall building
with the aid of a barometer."
The student had answered: "Take a barometer to the top of the
building, attach a long rope to it, lower the barometer to the street
and then bring it up, measuring the length of the rope. The length of
the rope is the height of the building."
I pointed out that the student really had a strong case for full
credit since he had answered the question completely and correctly. On
the other hand, if full credit was given, it could well contribute to
a high grade for the student in his physics course. A high grade is
supposed to certify competence in physics, but the answer did not
confirm this. I suggested that the student have another try at
answering the question I was not surprised that my colleague agreed,
but I was surprised that the student did.
I gave the student six minutes to answer the question with the warning
that the answer should show some knowledge of physics. At the end of
five minutes, he had not written anything. I asked if he wished to
give up, but he said no. He had many answers to this problem; he was
just thinking of the best one. I excused myself for interrupting him
and asked him to please go on. In the next minute he dashed off his
answer which read:
"Take the barometer to the top of the building and lean over the edge
of the roof. Drop that barometer, timing its fall with a stopwatch.
Then using the formula S = ½at², calculate the height of the building.
At this point I asked my colleague if he would give up. He conceded,
and I gave the student almost full credit.
In leaving my colleague's office, I recalled that the student had said
he had many other answers to the problem, so I asked him what they
were. "Oh yes," said the student. "There are a great many ways of
getting the height of a tall building with a barometer. For example,
you could take the barometer out on a sunny day and measure the height
of the barometer and the length of its shadow, and the length of the
shadow of the building and by the use of a simple proportion,
determine the height of the building."
"Fine," I asked. "And the others?"
"Yes," said the student. "There is a very basic measurement method
that you will like. In this method you take the barometer and begin to
walk up the stairs. As you climb the stairs, you mark off the length
of the barometer along the wa]l. You then count the number of marks,
and this will give you the height of the building in barometer units.
A very direct method."
"Of course, if you want a more sophisticated method, you can tie the
barometer to the end of a string, swing it as a pendulum, and
determine the value of `g' at the street level and at the top of the
building. From the difference of the two values of `g' the height of
the building can be calculated."
Finally, he concluded, there are many other ways of solving the
problem. "Probably the best," he said, "is to take the barometer to
the basement and knock on the superintendent's door. When the
superintendent answers, you speak to him as follows: "Mr.
Superintendent, here I have a fine barometer. If you tell me the
height of this building, I will give you this barometer."
At this point I asked the student if he really did know the
conventional answer to this question. He admitted that he did, said
that he was fed up with high school and college instructors trying to
teach him how to think, using the "scientific method," and to explore
the deep inner logic of the subject in a pedantic way, as is often
done in the new mathematics, rather than teaching him the structure of
the subject. With this in mind, he decided to revive scholasticism as
an academic lark to challenge the Sputnik-panicked classrooms of
America.
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