My girlfriend just called me at work, sobbing...

[BigSmooth]

She didn't get into the Master's Degree program at Georgetown that she applied for.
It was a big reason we decided to move out here to DC and I think she feels like she let me down and now she doesn't know what to do (her current job was just supposed to be short-term).

What can I do to console her? I am at a loss here, I think she feels like she messed up our "life plan" which was to stay here until she was out of school while I worked and then move back to Portland. She's the type that likes to have everything planned out. Now everything is out of whack. The good news is that I do have a good job and am gaining great experience, but I essentially have to stay at this job at least until this November. I am guessing she would rather move back to Portland sooner rather than later (and so would I), but it just can't happen now.

What can I do or say to make her feel better?

 

[kru]

tell her that plans aren't set in stone, but the important thing is that whatever path she decides on, you will be right there beside her the whole way.


(uh...you WILL be right there beside her the whole way, right?)


anyway, there's always the possibility of her finding a job and applying again for that master's program down the line. or are there any other masters programs being offered that she might apply for? if you're locked into that job until November, then she'll have to adjust to that just as you were willing to pack up and move there to support her while she pursued her masters.

 

[Viper GTS]

Start makin' calls right now.

Take her out to dinner, have roses waiting for her, spoil her for the evening. Take her mind off it, remind her that you're not in love with her for a college degree. Once the initial pain is over then you two can start making life plans again.

Now get moving, you've got somebody to take care of.

Viper GTS

 

[StageLeft]

How old are you? Unfortunately sh*t happens, and the younger you are the better. My fiance is in school and I'm "working", but last december got laid off and so instead of May 1st being when we move into a new apartment (original plan) after our wedding we recently moved into my parents house. Sucks the biggest ass I ever saw, but hopefully things will look up. Everybody runs into a road block or two in their life...its really not the end of the world

 

[SuperSix]

Small bouquet of flowers, and a nice walk after a romantic dinner.

 

[Total Refected Power]

First I am sorry she didn't get into the program. That is disheartening.

Second don't search for answers right away. That is most men's biggest mistake. We are "fixers" offer solutions right away while quite often women want you just to listen and let them air it out. Soon enough will the two of you figure out your next step.

Now about the next step. Are their other programs nearby? That area of the world has lots of good schools. I am sure there are comparable programs that will accept her. Don't let her runaway from this. She will regret it.

But first just be a GOOD FRIEND and let her set the pace of healing.

 

[BigSmooth]

I'm 22, we have been together since highschool, so I know that our relatoinship will be OK. THe bigger problem is that the program she was applying for was a very specific teaching program which she really wanted to pursue as a career (and not many schools offer it). I would try the romance thing, but she sounded pretty distraught, I don't know if that is going to take her mind off of it.

Heck, I'm not worried about it at all, I know sh!t happens and we will be fine. I am more worried about her right now.

 

[Tominator]

Alan Greenspan flunked out of college! He was told he never would get a degree....there are not too many famous people that haven't failed and most many times. How we handle those failures is how character is built.....and what SuperSix said...

 

[Noriaki]

I have to go with Viper...don't try and "fix it" right now, you can't. But try and make her happy.

 

[BigSmooth]

TRP, yes there are a few other schools that offer it, I believe, even though it is pretty specific. She REALLY wanted Georgetown though, obviously it is an excellent school, plus it is Jesuit and she went to a Jesuit undergrad university.

 

[BigSmooth]

I know I can't fix it, but you know how frustrating it is when your loved one is in pain and you are pretty much helpless. I guess I can just try to console her as best I can and see if I cna point out any positive angle to this situation.

 

[Total Refected Power]

Bigsmooth:

I was "wait-listed" at Georgetown back in 1986. Ranked #5 in my high school class, 1400 SAT and GPA of 4.2/4.0 with a ton of activities.

Went to a state school, then went to graduate school (PhD @ UVA), did post-doctoral training at HARVARD and now have a faculty position.

So what did those guys know?????????

Keep her chin up!!!!!!

 

[SCSIfreek]

Sorry to hear that bigsmooth, all you do now is plan your dinner and listen to her while you're with her. Sh|t happens just have to deal with it one step at a time. If you feel that she needs oyu NOW(at this moment) then take half day off and go talk to her. Since she is so depend(somewhat in a way) on you do know that you play a larger role in her happiness. good luck.


--SCSI

 

[BigSmooth]

Well, thanks for all the support guys. It turned out better than I expected, actually. I cut out of work a little bit early and when I came home, she was OK. Well, not OK, she didn't want to talk about it but she was being levelheaded, at least. Later on, we talked about it and although she was definitely upset that our master plan had gone awry, she is already checking into other programs here like George Mason and schools back in Oregon in case we decide to move back there. She is still a little shaken up but I think her initial reaction was just more shock and confusion than anything (she was very well qualified, like you were TRP).

We'll see how things go... I wanted to move back to Oregon anyway, that's where our friends and family are.

 

[konichiwa]

Take her out to dinner, wine her and dine her, and then, well...you take it from there.