My dog story from Sunday night...nail + penis = ouch

[daweeze02]

So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

 

[chorb]

why was this a must read?

 

[So]

Wow, you really oversold that story in the title.

 

[Tiamat]

Originally posted by: daweeze02
So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

So, what happened to the other half of the story?

 

[Tim]

Dogs stories aren't good unless it involves drinking gasoline.

 

[rudeguy]

So do we get to see your dog's peener or what?

 

[darkxshade]

so do you have to like massage it to keep the blood flowing now?

 

[daweeze02]

Originally posted by: Tiamat

Originally posted by: daweeze02
So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

So, what happened to the other half of the story?

That part wasnt as crazy.....I just came back and my cousin had found him wondering around the neighborhood behind ours.

And yes I could have went into more detail about the mangled penis shaft and the horrible smell of blood that was oozing from the shaft but I am work and people are calling me with dumb tech issues.

 

[daweeze02]

Originally posted by: darkxshade
so do you have to like massage it to keep the blood flowing now?

lol no I just have to keep a cone on his head and give him pain killers everyday and keep him from getting exciting so the rockets doesnt try to come out too far right now.

 

[darkxshade]

Originally posted by: daweeze02
So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

So did you get a bloody dog facial?

 

[daweeze02]

Originally posted by: darkxshade

Originally posted by: daweeze02
So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

So did you get a bloody dog facial?

No facial just like a little handjob you could say and my shirt and jeans as well

 

[rudeguy]

still waiting for doggy peener pics

 

[thecoolnessrune]

Originally posted by: darkxshade

Originally posted by: daweeze02
So Sunday I was at my aunt and uncles having a BBQ and watching some football. I live down the street and every weekend I take my 3 dogs there. I have 2 mini Dachshunds and a small terrier mix. For anyone who has ever had a Dachshund, you know they are mischievous little guys and mine love to try to get out. So after dinner my aunt had asked me if I had seen Jack and Whiskey but I just thought they were hunting lizards in the back. Well my aunt went out and saw whiskey like standing against the corner of the fence not making a sound. All of a sudden I heard a scream and she yelled to me saying he was bleeding. I rushed over there to find a nail through what I thought was his leg. I some how slid him against the fence because the nail was on the other side and as I got him in my arms and blood was going all over me I notice it went through his penis no lie. So I was freaking out and didnt have time to find Jack. We rushed to the vet and $1000 later they fixed him up and said the nail just missed the redrocket and and just messed up the sheath really bad. Needless to say he is one lucky ass dog she said.


Cliffs - Nail through dogs penis....enough said

So did you get a bloody dog facial?

mmmm.. I have a hunger for some strawberry ice cream now.

 

[daweeze02]

Originally posted by: rudeguy
still waiting for doggy peener pics

i will talk to the dog when I get home and see what he says about that......so far i just took a pic of him with the cone on him, he wasnt very happy

 

[Newbian]

Stop watching south park...

 

[darkxshade]

Originally posted by: daweeze02

Originally posted by: rudeguy
still waiting for doggy peener pics

i will talk to the dog when I get home and see what he says about that......so far i just took a pic of him with the cone on him, he wasnt very happy

Nooooo, you don't say? On a scale from 1-10 with 10 being the happiest, how happy would YOU be if a nail had just went through your wang?

 

[nakedfrog]

Whiskey

 

[nace186]

Tango

 

[speg]

Jack

 

[DrPizza]

$1000, for a puncture wound?!
That's the part I find amazing. Hell, we had a vet make a housecall for a goat with a prolapsed rectum; required sedation, sterilization, & mild surgery. I think the bill was $80.

 

[Capt Caveman]

What did they do for $1000? Did they have to take xrays or do an ultrasound? Sounds very expensive if all they did was put in some stitches and put him on antibiotics. Glad he's alright. I know why you mean about Dachshunds. My doxie Mojo ran under a barbed wire cattle fence and sliced his back all the way down his back. Many stitches and drains were needed.

 

[MyThirdEye]

read as jail + penis = ouch

 

[TheInternet1980]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
$1000, for a puncture wound?!
That's the part I find amazing. Hell, we had a vet make a housecall for a goat with a prolapsed rectum; required sedation, sterilization, & mild surgery. I think the bill was $80.

I'll be the first to ask...how the hell did the goat's rectum become prolapsed?

 

[Terabyte]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
$1000, for a puncture wound?!
That's the part I find amazing. Hell, we had a vet make a housecall for a goat with a prolapsed rectum; required sedation, sterilization, & mild surgery. I think the bill was $80.

quit being so rough

 

[sonambulo]

Originally posted by: DrPizza
$1000, for a puncture wound?!
That's the part I find amazing. Hell, we had a vet make a housecall for a goat with a prolapsed rectum; required sedation, sterilization, & mild surgery. I think the bill was $80.

The vet gave you a discount because he knew your wife was already pissed off enough as it was.