My 17 year old daughter wants to go on a school trip to Europe

[oboeguy]

How is this even in question. YES PAY FOR IT!!!!!!!!!! How could you even think of denying your daughter such a great experience? Write the check now, cheap arse!

And those who would say "I wouldn't let my daughter go", I feel sorry for you. Yes, you know your daughter better than anyone so we armchair parents can't say anything about your specific situation, but you have to let go at some point!

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: K1052

Originally posted by: amdhunter
I can't wait to see the look on your face when she comes back pregnant, and the father is a billion miles away.

I would not let my daughter go, but definitely would let my son go and have fun.

Your daughter is going to screw everything that moves once she gets to college anyway so what's the problem?


(most likely not but I find it amusing to play up your deep irrational paranoia causing you to deny your daughter a great and very worthwhile experience)

Agreed. You teach your kid good moral values and a deep sense of self-worth and more than likely they will make wise choices in life. You limit their choices and possiblities and stifle them, that can cause backlash later.

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: ForumMaster
she should work for it. all my life, whenever i have wanted something be it my computer or whatnot, i payed most if not all. tell her to start working and earn as much as she can, then pay the rest and some spending money as xmas+bday gifts. $2.5k is a lot of money.

Agreed!

I had to work for most of everything I wanted as well. I learned not to want everything, and to only get what I either really wanted or actually needed. It was good lesson to learn, but you can also teach a kid the value of working for what you want while still paying for the trip if you know how to do it right.

 

[frankgomez75]

Originally posted by: Safeway
I went on a trip just like this. My parents said that they would pay for the entire trip as long as I got everyone in my family (Aunts, uncles, grandparents, ...) thoughtful and substantial gifts. For instance, I went to Turkey and got several hand-made linens, etc.

It really made me think of my family while I was over there on my parents dollar, and appreciate the trip.

Edit: I paid for all the gifts.

:thumbsup: That sounds like a great idea. I'll have to file that somewhere to use later on why my kid grows up and is old enough to go on such a trip.

I would add that her grades and GPA need to be respectable.

 

[D1gger]

Seems like the consensus is pretty much what I want to do. The money is not actually an issue, as it will not put a strain on our finances. I want to make sure she really appreciates the value of saving, and I think she will appreciate the trip more if she has put some of her own money in.

My initial thought was that we match her savings, dollar for dollar for all of the trip expenses, except her spending money. She does have a part time job and should be able to save a considerable amount as she is generally good at saving her money.

Regarding the couple of comments about partying and orgies (I still remember what I was like at that age), that does concern me, but I trust her judgement and she knows she is responsible for the consequences of her actions.

Now I can only hope that my wife agrees with this plan.

 

[WildHorse]

Well she can always get a cheap ticket to Europe & hostel around on Eurorail so $2,500 sounds VERY inflated. SOmething's "off" with that price.

I think you should pay her way so she isn't guilted or pressured into dealing with the money aspect at age 17. It could be your HS graduation present to her.

If in the end it doesn't work out, she can always go to Europe the summer after grad, with a backpack, as a girl, & have the time of her life & come home a woman.

 

[Madwand1]

Budget for more than you expect, and don't be cheap, but don't be too extravagant and permissive. Tying such rewards to academic performance is a good motivator, and they're not bribes -- that academic performance and such experiences should pay off for her in the long run.

You might consider a partial loan deal -- making up any shortfalls in the future.

 

[krunchykrome]

If you are her parents, pay for it.

 

[eakers]

if you can afford it, pay for it but let her pay for her own spending money.

 

[rgwalt]

Originally posted by: D1gger
Seems like the consensus is pretty much what I want to do. The money is not actually an issue, as it will not put a strain on our finances. I want to make sure she really appreciates the value of saving, and I think she will appreciate the trip more if she has put some of her own money in.

My initial thought was that we match her savings, dollar for dollar for all of the trip expenses, except her spending money. She does have a part time job and should be able to save a considerable amount as she is generally good at saving her money.

Regarding the couple of comments about partying and orgies (I still remember what I was like at that age), that does concern me, but I trust her judgement and she knows she is responsible for the consequences of her actions.

Now I can only hope that my wife agrees with this plan.

Matching isn't a bad idea. I am sure you trust your daughter... it is all the other guys out there I don't trust...

R

 

[djheater]

Originally posted by: D1gger
Her history and language teachers are planning a trip to Europe in the spring to visit some historic sites. The cost of airfare, hotels and most of the meals is about $2,500. My daughter really wants to go, but it will be tough for her to save enough money between now and the spring to pay for it.

I have some idea of what I want to do, but I would like to hear some other opinions before I make a decision.

What say you?

I have 3 daughters and I would absolutely pay for them to have that experience. I would expect them to work their asses off for it too... but I would make sure they went.

 

[Lonyo]

If you have plenty of money, then say you will go half-half, and then at the end suprise her by paying for it all, assuming she makes her half by working (which she can then use as spending money) if not, then go half-half and make her pay the half.

 

[DaShen]

Originally posted by: D1gger
Seems like the consensus is pretty much what I want to do. The money is not actually an issue, as it will not put a strain on our finances. I want to make sure she really appreciates the value of saving, and I think she will appreciate the trip more if she has put some of her own money in.

My initial thought was that we match her savings, dollar for dollar for all of the trip expenses, except her spending money. She does have a part time job and should be able to save a considerable amount as she is generally good at saving her money.

Regarding the couple of comments about partying and orgies (I still remember what I was like at that age), that does concern me, but I trust her judgement and she knows she is responsible for the consequences of her actions.

Now I can only hope that my wife agrees with this plan.

Good for you, OP :thumbsup:

 

[Kadarin]

Originally posted by: amdhunter
I can't wait to see the look on your face when she comes back pregnant, and the father is a billion miles away.

I would not let my daughter go, but definitely would let my son go and have fun.

Nice double standard there... Would you make your daughter wear a burqa, too? Lock her in the basement?

 

[Kelemvor]

Come up with an agreement of how much you can pay and how much she shoudl pay. THen if she doesn't have it, make arrangements for her to pay you back at $xxx/mo or something.

 

[allisolm]

Originally posted by: D1gger
My initial thought was that we match her savings, dollar for dollar for all of the trip expenses, except her spending money. She does have a part time job and should be able to save a considerable amount as she is generally good at saving her money.

Sounds good, but I agree with frankgomez75 that the grades have to stay up between now and then or no deal. Maybe that is not even an issue with her (it never was with my own children, thankfully.)

I also think the idea about thoughtful gifts for close family members is something to consider.

The opportunity to travel in other countries gives teenagers a chance to see that their home towns are not the center of the universe. It is an experience not to be missed if at all possible, at least in my opinion.

 

[Vegitto]

I would not pay for her. I can hear it now:"Daddy, why can't I have that nice car? It's only $15,000.. You paid for my trip to Europe, too.. Please, Daddy?"

 

[Kadarin]

Oops, hit quote instead of edit....

 

[Horus]

Originally posted by: amdhunter
I can't wait to see the look on your face when she comes back pregnant, and the father is a billion miles away.

I would not let my daughter go, but definitely would let my son go and have fun.

Wow. Most sexist comment ever on ATOT. Holy christ.

 

[Kirby]

Originally posted by: Vegitto
I would not pay for her. I can hear it now:"Daddy, why can't I have that nice car? It's only $15,000.. You paid for my trip to Europe, too.. Please, Daddy?"

there's a pretty big difference between a paying for a cultural experience and buying your kid an expensive car :roll:

 

[Bateluer]

She should have to pay for a portion of it. 17 is old enough to work.

Such a trip is a great experience, but still very expensive. Turn the great cultural trip into a valuable financial lesson as well.

 

[moshquerade]

Originally posted by: D1gger
Her history and language teachers are planning a trip to Europe in the spring to visit some historic sites. The cost of airfare, hotels and most of the meals is about $2,500. My daughter really wants to go, but it will be tough for her to save enough money between now and the spring to pay for it.

I have some idea of what I want to do, but I would like to hear some other opinions before I make a decision.

What say you?

Great opportunity for her. She should pay for it though, and that includes what she makes this next Summer working.
(Not that you shouldn't pay for some of it, but the bulk should come from her earnings)

 

[Safeway]

Originally posted by: frankgomez75

Originally posted by: Safeway
I went on a trip just like this. My parents said that they would pay for the entire trip as long as I got everyone in my family (Aunts, uncles, grandparents, ...) thoughtful and substantial gifts. For instance, I went to Turkey and got several hand-made linens, etc.

It really made me think of my family while I was over there on my parents dollar, and appreciate the trip.

Edit: I paid for all the gifts.

:thumbsup: That sounds like a great idea. I'll have to file that somewhere to use later on why my kid grows up and is old enough to go on such a trip.

I would add that her grades and GPA need to be respectable.

My parents did something right with my sister and me

When I got back from the trip, we had an inverse party. It was a big get-together to show off my pictures from the trip, and to hand out the gifts.

 

[D1gger]

Originally posted by: moshquerade

Originally posted by: D1gger
Her history and language teachers are planning a trip to Europe in the spring to visit some historic sites. The cost of airfare, hotels and most of the meals is about $2,500. My daughter really wants to go, but it will be tough for her to save enough money between now and the spring to pay for it.

I have some idea of what I want to do, but I would like to hear some other opinions before I make a decision.

What say you?

Great opportunity for her. She should pay for it though, and that includes what she makes this next Summer working.
(Not that you shouldn't pay for some of it, but the bulk should come from her earnings)

I'm interested in why you say she should pay for "the bulk" of the costs. I had thought a 50/50 deal would work, but I really would like to hear your rationale.

 

[oboeguy]

I'm really having trouble following this "she should pay for it" reasoning. At some point, if an educational opportunity like this arises, a parent should be willing to invest in it as such, and not consider the trip merely a treat the kid should earn. Really, not all learning happens in school. Sure, make her earn some of it if you'd like (an educational experience itself, yes) but some of you sound like real tightwads!