Mental issues with gf?s mother

[amdskip]

My gf?s mom has mental issues and the topic is not discussable at all with her. I?ll get right to the point and give you some examples:

Claims people are getting in her house and stealing all her things.
Every couple of weeks a yelling spree ensues and the topic is usually about people of another race in her house and they need to get out right now. This usually also involves heavy foot stomping and slamming cabinet doors and drawers.
She has no concerns about money at all.
She has not been to a doctor in years as she has her own made up doctors that take care of her.

The list goes on. What I am trying to figure out for my gf is what her options are for getting help for her mom. Her mom will not get help on her own obviously and as we understand it as long as she doesn?t hurt or threaten anyone, there is really nothing we can do. Short of calling the police and making up a threat, what are our options? She is located in the Chicago area.

 

[Q]

Show up at her door and pretend you are one of her imaginary doctors.

 

[SmoochyTX]

If your girlfriend is under 18, somebody should call CPS. If she's over 18, she should move out and call Mental Health Services.

 

[HomeBrewerDude]

how old is she? is this new behavior?

Until she demonstrates that she is a risk to herself or someone else then there isn't anything the authorities will do. I'd guess you're options will include talking to a psychologist or psychiatrist for advice on how her family can develop coping strategies. These should include coping strategies for the family members as well as for the mother.

 

[invidia]

Originally posted by: SmoochyTX
If your girlfriend is under 18, somebody should call CPS. If she's over 18, she should move out and call Mental Health Services.

Pretty much agree. She's clearly insane with mental issues, not a pissed-off-all-time bitch kind of attitude.

 

[amdskip]

Originally posted by: HomeBrewerDude
how old is she? is this new behavior?

Until she demonstrates that she is a risk to herself or someone else then there isn't anything the authorities will do. I'd guess you're options will include talking to a psychologist or psychiatrist for advice on how her family can develop coping strategies. These should include coping strategies for the family members as well as for the mother.

Her mom is in her 50's. The first part of this behavior started 15+ years ago when she quit her nursing job with no discussion and decided to just sit at home all day. After she quit the job, she quit driving too and her car has sat in the garage ever since. I would like to take the car out of the garage so my gf has a stall to park in but that too is not a topic of discussion.

 

[KK]

good luck with your gf.

 

[funkymatt]

the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. get out while you can.

 

[olds]

<--- L&R

 

[zoiks]

Probably bi-polar.

 

[IGBT]

Originally posted by: amdskip
My gf?s mom has mental issues and the topic is not discussable at all with her. I?ll get right to the point and give you some examples:

Claims people are getting in her house and stealing all her things.
Every couple of weeks a yelling spree ensues and the topic is usually about people of another race in her house and they need to get out right now. This usually also involves heavy foot stomping and slamming cabinet doors and drawers.
She has no concerns about money at all.
She has not been to a doctor in years as she has her own made up doctors that take care of her.

The list goes on. What I am trying to figure out for my gf is what her options are for getting help for her mom. Her mom will not get help on her own obviously and as we understand it as long as she doesn?t hurt or threaten anyone, there is really nothing we can do. Short of calling the police and making up a threat, what are our options? She is located in the Chicago area.

..sounds damn serious. Need to get her to a doctor to see if there's an organic problem. I've seen diabetics get very strange. A stroke could also induce a personality change.

 

[Iron Woode]

one of my ex-gf's mother was like that. She was seriously wacked. I am surprised my ex turned out as sane as she did.

After one particularly extreme episode, her mother was placed in a 48hr observation facility (psych ward). She was forced into treatment and improved dramatically. My ex then moved out of the house and was much better off.

Moral of the story? I got out as soon as I could because I couldn't deal with it.

 

[Kadarin]

Do people have the right to remain mentally ill if they choose, assuming they're not physically harming someone, nor emotionally harming someone who cannot escape their immediate vicinity (i.e. a minor for whom she is the legal guardian)?

 

[BoomerD]

Follow crazy home, crazy opens the door!


My Grandmother got pretty whacky after about her 2nd or 3rd stroke. (she was about 90) She accused the neighbors of sneaking into her apartment (she lived in a retirement complex) and stealing her coffee...not all of it, just enought to make about a pot...then, as she got worse, she accused the guy next door of sending signals through her wall sockets...I suggested a tin-foil hat, but she wasn't having any of that nonsense..."those only act like antennas and make things worse."
Finally, she had one pretty big stroke and her brother (also in his 90's) moved her back to Iowa so she could be buried in the family plot when she died....Crazy old biddy lived to be almost 99...

 

[Elstupido]

What kind of car does she have?

 

[tasmanian]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
<--- L&R

Actually I think it might be Health and Fitness.

 

[Soundmanred]

I'd move the car out of the garage and tell the mom that some people of another race stole it. She may go out looking and never come back.
Free house and car = win.

 

[sonambulo]

Originally posted by: Quintox
Show up at her door and pretend you are one of her imaginary doctors.

Make sure you keep all your 'medical supplies' in a briefcase.

 

[thomsbrain]

Originally posted by: Kadarin
Do people have the right to remain mentally ill if they choose, assuming they're not physically harming someone, nor emotionally harming someone who cannot escape their immediate vicinity (i.e. a minor for whom she is the legal guardian)?

No one can legally force them to get help unless the above is true.

If GF lives with mom, it's just time to move out. If not, you may need to use GF's visits as collateral to get her to a real doctor or psychiatrist. "Mom, I love you and I want to visit you, but you need help and I can't be around you anymore unless you let me take you to my doctor. Let's do this together."

If she makes any threats of violence to herself or others, you can call the police and request a "51-50" assessment, where they determine if she needs to go to a hospital for a 72 hour "evaluation hold." If she does, they will take her there or call an ambulance to do it. It's never a pretty sight to watch someone get taken away like that and she won't have fun being there, but she will be forced to see a psychiatrist while she is in there, and may also get referred to community-based services that can help ensure she gets the ongoing care she needs.

If Mom is super resistant to the idea of going to the doctor and gets highly escalated when you bring it up, you may be able to manipulate her a bit by pushing the issue until she really blows her top, then calling the police. Your GF would have to decide for herself if that was morally acceptable.

 

[ranmaniac]

Have someone distract her while you notify the authorities.

 

[narzy]

Originally posted by: zoiks
Probably bi-polar.

Are you a PhD in psychology?
If you were you would not be throwing out diagnosis without first examining the woman which you clearly cannot do on an internet forum from a he said she said post...

The only thing you should do is talk about your concerns with your girlfriend and either let it be or decide that this is not the relationship for you and move on. You're not family so you really have no say in how that family functions.

If you feel you really need to talk to the mother about your concerns, but generally that ends extremely poorly and you will not win.

 

[AlienCraft]

Originally posted by: Quintox
Show up at her door and pretend you are one of her imaginary doctors.

Brilliant!

 

[SearchMaster]

Originally posted by: oldsmoboat
<--- L&R

Pshhh - wannabe ex-mod mini-mods.

 

[BabaBooey]

Run fast,run hard and do not look back as the but does not fall far from the tree my friend,thats your future if ya stick around.

 

[alkemyst]

pics of g/f and mom to determine who is right.