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Me = total jerk

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Dude you did the right thing for yourself and she seems like a total pain in the ass anyways.

Good job.

Edit: btw I'm a dick also, some girl I was talking to kept IM'ing me all the damn time and I just got tired of her so I blocked her, then I get an IM from some unknown person, accept it and it was her asking why I blocked her, blah blah blah. That was complete ownage on me. Happened last night.
 
You had two dates with a pschotic girl from a psychotic, dysfunctional family.

She was not your GF and you're not responsible for taking care of her.

Clear your conscience; you did the right thing by getting out BEFORE you got too involved. Now go outside and throw a football around or some guy-type thing. Stop watching Oprah; it's hurting your testosterone levels!
 
Originally posted by: Yossarian
3 weeks and 2 dates = she wasn't your GF anyway.
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Yeah, I was about to say that... except you also said you'd been going out for a month, so I was wondering if there was a lot more going on in the missing week.

If only two dates, then I'm not sure a "formal" break up is required... unless she's nuts (or you are).

If she is completely nuts, I'd try getting back with her in a few weeks/months. The crazy ones are always the best! 😀

edit: I wouldn't classify you as a "total jerk" over this situation. It's a matter of bad timing, and that's not your fault.
 
Originally posted by: Alphathree33
We'd only been together for a month... and she was a great girl. Nothing at all wrong with her.

Unfortunately, her parents are insane. They're not just protective. We'd make plans to go out, then she'd fight with her mother about how she doesn't remember her asking, and so on.

After three weeks together, we'd been on exactly two dates.

She lives about 40 minutes away, which also didn't help.

So I saw the writing on the wall -- her parents who were always causing her emotional trouble and getting in the way of our relationship, and the distance. And I thought it better to end it after a month than after six months.

Makes sense, doesn't it?

So I got home one pensive night and sent her an email with these thoughts and told her to call me (she's difficult to get in touch with)

So this morning she calls, I pick up thinking she's read my email and wants to talk. Turns out her mother has just packed her bags and walked out, saying my ex-gf was "dead to her" and shoving her into a wall.

Now, I've never actually met her parents... second hand stories like this scared me enough. So when I heard that, I realized two things:
1. My worries about her parents had only been confirmed... I come from a loving family, and I want a girl who comes from a loving family
2. She hadn't read my email and she was calling to cry about her mother

Well I let her cry and I comforted her, but I had to tell her it was over at the same time because otherwise she'd run into my email later in the day.

So I did.

I explained what I thought about her family and the distance put together, and how I thought it would be better for both of us to end it now.

I've never broken up with a girl before... she was only my second girlfriend. I was sure to focus on the issues and not on her, and I somehow thought we could still be friends, still talk. But that's not what happened...

Instead, she went into attack mode, telling me how she's got guys lined up waiting to go out with her, how I didn't deserve her anyway, and so on and so forth.

And, surprisingly, she rose to the defense of her family.

The call ended with her sister shouting 'bastard' in the background.

This is all a bit much for me to handle. I'm a guy who (read my past ATOT posts) has only recently learned how to deal with girls, and I've had a lot of luck.

But I'm also beginning to hate myself, because I've gone from that shy, geeky guy in high school who could never get a girl but who always treated girls with respect to someone else... some other person who can get girls. But I'm not sure that I like myself anymore... does that make any sense?
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I wouldn't worry about her to much, people will say thing when they are in emmotional distress. It sounds like there might also be more issues there then you know of.
 
you broke up with your gf because you're dissatisfied with her FAMILY ? 🙂

You only went on TWO (!) dates with her - NEVER met her familly..and 'break up' with her after a month ?

What relationship is that ? The only thing i can explain this nonsense is that you must be VERY young.....l
 
"local girl commits suicide after mother walks out on her and bf breaks up with her on the same day."

I wouldn't have done it, you could have waited a day or two or even a week to do it.

EDIT:: pics of her?
 
Originally posted by: MichaelD
You had two dates with a pschotic girl from a psychotic, dysfunctional family.

She was not your GF and you're not responsible for taking care of her.

Clear your conscience; you did the right thing by getting out BEFORE you got too involved. Now go outside and throw a football around or some guy-type thing. Stop watching Oprah; it's hurting your testosterone levels!
Click to expand...

I just went and got McDonalds, is that guy enough for you? 😀

Thanks for your comments, MichaelD. I know you're a man of experience. 😀
 
Originally posted by: JeffCos
"local girl commits suicide after mother walks out on her and bf breaks up with her on the same day."

I wouldn't have done it, you could have waited a day or two or even a week to do it.
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I had no choice... the e-mail was already sent before I knew about the mom-situation.

My choice was either TELL HER RIGHT NOW on the phone, or LET HER FIND OUT LATER IN THE DAY when she checked her email.

I was stuck between a rock and a hard place... so I took the lesser of two evils and told her while I was on the phone with her.
 
Assuming you're a decent looking guy that isn't a complete dork, I'm sure this is just #2 in a (hopefully) long and prosperus list of ex-girlfriends. You got a peek of what she was really like based on her reaction. Chalk it up to experience, have a :beer: and start lookin for the next victim!
 
Originally posted by: Alphathree33
Originally posted by: Yossarian
3 weeks and 2 dates = she wasn't your GF anyway.
Click to expand...

I know -- and we never even had "the talk" -- she just started calling me "her man" and was very posessive that way, and commented on what I did with other girls when we talked, and so on.
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Good call. Post on YAGT.org for more help.
 
Originally posted by: MadCowDisease
You tried to break up over e-mail. You = spineless.
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I don't think he was breaking up over email completely. He wanted to explain the situation and also talk on the phone. This was the purpose of the email...to get a phone call and talk over the situation like mature human beings. Unfortunately, it sounds as if the girl is immature and hasn't been raised to be respectful, loving, or understandin. Don't worry...this is part of your development as a person. You will learn; and hopefully she will will too.

Good luck,
Elias
 
Dude, you completely did the right thing for the both of you. Unfortunately, for you, the timing was horrible....but there was no way you could have known that. I've made a stone-set rule for myself that girls I date MUST have a good relationship with their folks (particularly their moms). After having three serious girlfriends who's issues with their folks (again, particularly their moms) always became a burden thrown onto my shoulders and the relationship....I'm done with that kind of sh!t. Seriously, what a PITA.
 
3 weeks & 2 dates doesn't really require a "breakup" ... you probably didn't need to even send the email

 
Two dates does not require any breakup, there is more to this story than you are telling, isn't there?

If you are honest, i can help you but you need to be honest then, and i doubt you are, it just doesn't make any sense, unless you promised her something.

You did, didn't you?
 
I think you handled things as well as could be expected given the situation. I wouldn't be too hard on her about her reaction. She sort of got a double whammy. She's hurting. The timing was just really bad.
 
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