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Man struck by lightning bolt files lawsuit against God

?I?m suing for a hundred million bucks, and I know God can afford it,? says Wilding, a 37-year-old rancher who recently filed a lawsuit against the Lord.
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I'll have some of what he's been smoking...
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?Sure, I?ve broken a couple of Commandments in my day. I?ve told a few white lies. I shoplifted a couple things when I was a kid. And I think my neighbor?s wife is pretty hot.

?But this punishment is way out of line for those sins. The Big Guy is going to have to settle with me on this one.?
 
So basically if the Almighty is found guilty, this man's church is going to have to pay up with proceeds collected from charity? Or will all the recognized Judeo-Christian nonprofits in the US have to chip in their fair share? How else does he expect to be paid?
 
?I?m a law-abiding man. I go to church every Sunday with my family. I do charity work. I recycle. I can?t imagine why God has singled me out for this kind of harassment.?

?Sure, I?ve broken a couple of Commandments in my day. I?ve told a few white lies. I shoplifted a couple things when I was a kid. And I think my neighbor?s wife is pretty hot.

?But this punishment is way out of line for those sins. The Big Guy is going to have to settle with me on this one.?

 
I can't view the actual text, but I REALLY hope that this is one of those parody new journals.
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Welcome to the board Layna.
 
Originally posted by: Placer14
I can't view the actual text, but I REALLY hope that this is one of those parody new journals.
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Not exactly, but it's the slightly more sensational idiot cousin of the National Enquirer.
 
"This is harrassment, pure and simple!" hahaha

Gotta love the Weekly World News! 😀 (just don't believe a word written in it, it's like the Mad of the newspaper world 😉 )
 
"You're all a bunch of morons. never beleive the Weekly world news."

That's exactly what I was thinking. Well, not the "moron" part, as that's disrespectful. I mean the Weekly World News is a source to frown at. I always see it stacked with other tabloids, but it tends to have the most bizarre stories that are too ridiculous to be real or some articles about the paranormal.
 
yeah, agreed with the above posts.. Weekly World News is those supermarket tabloids that say "aliens abducted my dog!" or "dinosaur found alive in nevada!"
 
The court could render summary judgement either way with minimal costs to the taxpayers.

Against: "you're a looney! Get the hell out of my courtroom!"

For: "Sure. God, you own him $100,000,000.00" Now try to collect.

Either way, 10 minutes of time in court.
 
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