Six years ago, and two weeks before my wedding, I had surgery to remove a cancerous testicle. My prognosis was good, with no indication that it had spread, so I elected for surveillance over two rounds of adjunct chemotherapy. A year later, and a week before the planned 1-year-milestone celebration was supposed to go off, my markers spiked and a 2cm nodule was found in my right lung. The party prep was cancelled, and instead I did 3 cycles of BEP.
The lead-in to one year was stressful. I didn't plan anything, after the experience of the prior year, and instead sweated every minute between the tests and receiving the results. That day came and went; I breathed a huge sigh of relief, high-fived my wife, and that was it. Two was a little less stressful; I still sweated the test results, but I wasn't quite so convinced that they would bring bad news. Three was a bit easier but stressful still, and last year was the first time I let myself look forward to the big one.
Tomorrow marks five years cancer free*. It's the major milestone. It's the turning point, where odds swing back in my favor should the cancer return. And it's mostly arbitrary. It's that day you're supposed to look forward to on that first day of treatment, that day that everyone wants to celebrate, that day that not everyone gets to wake up to. It's that day that finally means you did it, you're finally over the hump. It's that day when you're not a cancer patient anymore, you're a *survivor*. Ask me tomorrow how good it feels.
Anyway, I just wanted to share. The people close to me have mostly forgotten...and for good reason, as my milestone has been overshadowed by several much more important ones: the birth of our kids, and birthday's one, two, and three. Still, tomorrow is *my* day, and it's going to be a good one! And I'm going to celebrate, even if it all takes place just in my head!
Happy five years, everyone, I hope your day tomorrow is as good as mine!
Matt
*As far as I know
The lead-in to one year was stressful. I didn't plan anything, after the experience of the prior year, and instead sweated every minute between the tests and receiving the results. That day came and went; I breathed a huge sigh of relief, high-fived my wife, and that was it. Two was a little less stressful; I still sweated the test results, but I wasn't quite so convinced that they would bring bad news. Three was a bit easier but stressful still, and last year was the first time I let myself look forward to the big one.
Tomorrow marks five years cancer free*. It's the major milestone. It's the turning point, where odds swing back in my favor should the cancer return. And it's mostly arbitrary. It's that day you're supposed to look forward to on that first day of treatment, that day that everyone wants to celebrate, that day that not everyone gets to wake up to. It's that day that finally means you did it, you're finally over the hump. It's that day when you're not a cancer patient anymore, you're a *survivor*. Ask me tomorrow how good it feels.
Anyway, I just wanted to share. The people close to me have mostly forgotten...and for good reason, as my milestone has been overshadowed by several much more important ones: the birth of our kids, and birthday's one, two, and three. Still, tomorrow is *my* day, and it's going to be a good one! And I'm going to celebrate, even if it all takes place just in my head!
Happy five years, everyone, I hope your day tomorrow is as good as mine!
Matt
*As far as I know