America has engaged in some finger wagging lately because California
doesn't have enough electricity to meet its needs.
The rest of the country (including George W. Bush's energy secretary
Spencer Abraham, who wants Californians to suffer through blackouts as
justification for drilling for oil in Alaska's Arctic National Wildlife
Refuge) seems to be just fine with letting Californians dangle in the
breeze without enough power to meet their needs. They laugh at
Californians' frivolity.Well, everybody. Here's how it really is:
California ranks 48th in the nation in power consumed per
person.California grows more than half the nation's fruit, nuts and
vegetables. We're keeping them. We need something to eat when the power
goes out.
We grow 99 percent or more of the nation's almonds, artichokes, dates,
figs, kiwifruit, olives, persimmons, pistachios, prunes, raisins and
walnuts. Hope you won't miss them.
California is the nation's number one dairy state. We're keeping our
dairy products. We'll need plenty of fresh ones since our refrigerators
can't be relied upon. Got milk?
We Californians are going to keep all our high-tech software in state.
Silicon Valley is ours, after all. Without enough electricity, which
you're apparently keeping for yourselves, we just don't have enough
software to spare.
We're keeping all our airplanes. California builds a good percentage of
the commercial airliners available to fly you people to where you want
to go. When yours wear out, you'd better hope Boeing's Washington plant
can keep you supplied. There isn't enough electricity here to allow us
to build any more planes than we need ourselves.
Oh, yeah, and if you want to make a long-distance call, remember where
the satellite components and tracking systems come from. Maybe you could
get back in the habit of writing letters.
Want to see a movie this weekend? Come to California. We make them here.
Since we'll now have to make them with our own electricity, we're
keeping them. Even if we shot them somewhere else, the labs, printing
facilities, editing facilities, and sound facilities are all here.
Want some nice domestic wine? We produce over 17 million gallons per
year. We'll need all of it to drown our sorrows when we think about the
fact that no matter how many California products we export to make the
rest of America's lives better, America can't seem to help us out with a
little electricity. You can no longer have any of our wine.
You all complain that we don't build enough power plants. Well, you
don't grow enough food, write enough software, make enough movies, build
enough airplanes, or make enough wine.
Love,
The Californians
p.s. Can't send you any more cheese, either!
p.s. If this has been posted before, boo hoo, cry somewhere else
doesn't have enough electricity to meet its needs.
The rest of the country (including George W. Bush's energy secretary
Spencer Abraham, who wants Californians to suffer through blackouts as
justification for drilling for oil in Alaska's Arctic National Wildlife
Refuge) seems to be just fine with letting Californians dangle in the
breeze without enough power to meet their needs. They laugh at
Californians' frivolity.Well, everybody. Here's how it really is:
California ranks 48th in the nation in power consumed per
person.California grows more than half the nation's fruit, nuts and
vegetables. We're keeping them. We need something to eat when the power
goes out.
We grow 99 percent or more of the nation's almonds, artichokes, dates,
figs, kiwifruit, olives, persimmons, pistachios, prunes, raisins and
walnuts. Hope you won't miss them.
California is the nation's number one dairy state. We're keeping our
dairy products. We'll need plenty of fresh ones since our refrigerators
can't be relied upon. Got milk?
We Californians are going to keep all our high-tech software in state.
Silicon Valley is ours, after all. Without enough electricity, which
you're apparently keeping for yourselves, we just don't have enough
software to spare.
We're keeping all our airplanes. California builds a good percentage of
the commercial airliners available to fly you people to where you want
to go. When yours wear out, you'd better hope Boeing's Washington plant
can keep you supplied. There isn't enough electricity here to allow us
to build any more planes than we need ourselves.
Oh, yeah, and if you want to make a long-distance call, remember where
the satellite components and tracking systems come from. Maybe you could
get back in the habit of writing letters.
Want to see a movie this weekend? Come to California. We make them here.
Since we'll now have to make them with our own electricity, we're
keeping them. Even if we shot them somewhere else, the labs, printing
facilities, editing facilities, and sound facilities are all here.
Want some nice domestic wine? We produce over 17 million gallons per
year. We'll need all of it to drown our sorrows when we think about the
fact that no matter how many California products we export to make the
rest of America's lives better, America can't seem to help us out with a
little electricity. You can no longer have any of our wine.
You all complain that we don't build enough power plants. Well, you
don't grow enough food, write enough software, make enough movies, build
enough airplanes, or make enough wine.
Love,
The Californians
p.s. Can't send you any more cheese, either!
p.s. If this has been posted before, boo hoo, cry somewhere else
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