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Kind of a YAGT

Cdubneeddeal

Diamond Member
Well my girlfriend and I have called it quits. I made rash and dumb decisions in the past that led up to this...but that's a novel in itself.

I held back all of my love for anyone because the last time I fell in love and had my heartbroken I wanted to kill myself. Now that her and I have broken up i'm almost to the same point. I always thought being strong meant to not let anything in...boy was I wrong. It's hard for me to reach that happy medium to letting the feeling of love in and being strong. Time for some changes in my life. Ever since I was promoted to a supervisor in the company I work for everything is resting on my shoulders..now this. Feels like the world is caving in.

Rant, rave, emo, call it what you want. I'm going through some pain right now. I'm not a teenager but a 30 year old man feeling lost. Thanks for listening.
 
Damn that sucks man. Surround yourself with friends and keep yourself occupied. It takes these kinds of things and a lot of time for the pain to go away.
 
Originally posted by: Arschloch
Do you feel like you've learned anything about yourself because of this?

I'm in the process of that as we speak. My parents were never there for me or my sisters when we were children. When we were upset my dad would just send me to my room rather than dealing with the issue at hand. I know when I do fall in love i'm all in but i'm scared to get to that point because i'm leaving myself vulnerable. I thought I had the woman that I could do that with and when I got the point of letting her in, it caves in.

IMO, when people sleep around and do not settle down could be due to this. They're scared of being hurt. Sleeping with people with no strings is easier.
 
Originally posted by: ColdFusion718
Damn that sucks man. Surround yourself with friends and keep yourself occupied. It takes these kinds of things and a lot of time for the pain to go away.

Thats whats i would suggest. You are gonna think of it most when you are alone and bored. Find a few things to do with friends, it will help!
 
Originally posted by: astrocase
Originally posted by: KrillBee
Do you guys think its worth even getting into relationships? With all the pain associated with breakups?

What alternative is there?

self pleasuring, and no headaches or heartaches from dealing with women.


if you don't mind the extraordinary costs, the risk of STDs, and the whole lameness of it.
 
I'm sorry dude.. just try to think in relative terms -- I'm sure there are millions of ppl who would love your job -- or who are 25 yr old virgins -- or hell, who are worrying about where they are getting their next meal.

Not saying you don't have problems, just saying its good to put it in perspective sometimes.
 
Originally posted by: Rastus
Is it because she was putting on too much weight?

Not at all. She is/was slighly chunky but that wasn't the reasoning. I put up walls around me once the love feeling comes into play. It's a defense mechanism I have no control over, however, i'm trying. It's pretty complicated.

Originally posted by: LordSegan
I'm sorry dude.. just try to think in relative terms -- I'm sure there are millions of ppl who would love your job -- or who are 25 yr old virgins -- or hell, who are worrying about where they are getting their next meal.

Not saying you don't have problems, just saying its good to put it in perspective sometimes.

Thanks for that nice comment. It actually made me smile this morning when I read it. It's great to see comments like that because you get a new perspective on life and how it's not as bad as it seems. Although at this point in my life it feels there is no light at the end of the tunnel.

Here's an update. She went out to a local bar last night and ended up running into one of my ex's. They were both calling me up telling me i'm an asshole, blah blah blah. Me current ex wouldn't want to hear anything except for what she thought. The other ex listened to what I had to say and understands I had a very troubled childhood and realizes some of the mistakes or judgements I made were not intentional. I'm very suprised at her as I broke both of their hearts (Not intentionally). Now i'm the one suffering because I was so scared of love I pushed it away. Not that it's gone i'm lost again.

In time I know my heart will heal. As their hearts will as well.
 
The sucks dude ... but I hope you can rebound and find someone perfect for you. I hope you learned something about yourself too.
 
You need to try to move on and just learn from your mistakes. My last boyfriend got a second chance and he screwed up twice. Now that you've figured out the reasons why you close up... try to work with them so you don't end up in the same situation.
 
Originally posted by: Cdubneeddeal
Well my girlfriend and I have called it quits. I made rash and dumb decisions in the past that led up to this...but that's a novel in itself.

I held back all of my love for anyone because the last time I fell in love and had my heartbroken I wanted to kill myself. Now that her and I have broken up i'm almost to the same point. I always thought being strong meant to not let anything in...boy was I wrong. It's hard for me to reach that happy medium to letting the feeling of love in and being strong. Time for some changes in my life. Ever since I was promoted to a supervisor in the company I work for everything is resting on my shoulders..now this. Feels like the world is caving in.

Rant, rave, emo, call it what you want. I'm going through some pain right now. I'm not a teenager but a 30 year old man feeling lost. Thanks for listening.



wait a couple weeks, then tell her exactly what you said here. Else you're just holdinb ack still
 
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