Kentucky Jokes

[tyler811]

Two Kentuckians are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of Kentucky and Tennessee there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a Kentucky farmer, while the other half belongs to a Tennessee man.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Tennessee man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his Kentucky neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the Kentucky farmer asked.

Well, the Tennessee man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in Eastern Kentucky, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a KY cheerleader and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

 

[kingtas]

I used to poke fun at a friend from Kentucky because of the things he said, like "fixento".

Then I actually drove through Kentucky and discovered the beauty of the state.

 

[woowoo]

Originally posted by: tyler811



Two guys from New Mexico are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of New Mexico and Arizona there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a farmer from New Mexico, while the other half belongs to a man from Arizona.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Arizona man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the farmer asked.

Well, the man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in New Mexico, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a cheerleader in New Mexico and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

Fixed.....

 

[tyler811]

Originally posted by: kingtas
I used to poke fun at a friend from Kentucky because of the things he said, like "fixento".

Then I actually drove through Kentucky and discovered the beauty of the state.

Yes it is I have family in Lexington and Harrodsburg plus a couple of guys that on my servers are from Eastern KY. It does get humid though in the summer.

 

[tyler811]

Originally posted by: woowoo

Originally posted by: tyler811



Two guys from New Mexico are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of New Mexico and Arizona there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a farmer from New Mexico, while the other half belongs to a man from Arizona.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Arizona man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the farmer asked.

Well, the man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in New Mexico, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a cheerleader in New Mexico and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

Fixed.....

Try again :roll:

 

[woowoo]

All in good fun my friend.....

 

[Turin39789]

Originally posted by: tyler811

Originally posted by: woowoo

Originally posted by: tyler811



Two guys from New Mexico are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of New Mexico and Arizona there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a farmer from New Mexico, while the other half belongs to a man from Arizona.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Arizona man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the farmer asked.

Well, the man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in New Mexico, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a cheerleader in New Mexico and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

Fixed.....

Try again :roll:

That's the way I always heard them.

 

[kingtas]

Originally posted by: woowoo
All in good fun my friend.....

I know. I didn't mean to hijack the thread.

 

[ElFenix]

Originally posted by: tyler811

Originally posted by: woowoo

Originally posted by: tyler811



Two guys from Oklahoma are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of Oklahoma and Texas there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a farmer from Oklahoma, while the other half belongs to a man from Texas.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Texas man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the farmer asked.

Well, the man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in Oklahoma, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a cheerleader in Oklahoma and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

Fixed.....

Try again :roll:

done

 

[Turin39789]

Originally posted by: tyler811

Originally posted by: woowoo

Originally posted by: tyler811



Two guys from Texas are driving along a highway when they see a sheep with its head stuck in a fence.
The first one says, ?Heyyy, here?s our chance to have some fun!?
The second one pulls over and they get out of their car and go over to the sheep.
Sure enough it?s head is stuck firmly in place and there is no escape.
The first one says, ?I?m gonna have me a little piece of that?? he then dropped his pants and began ?servicing? the sheep from behind.
When he was done, he looked at the second one and said,, ?Okay,, it?s your turn now.?
The second one gave the first one a smile and said,, ?Whoooohoo, I?ve always dreamed of this!? He then dropped his pants and stuck his head in the fence next to the sheep and said, ?Go ahead, and take your time!?


On the border of Texas and Oklahoma there's a small forest. Half of the forest belongs to a farmer from Texas, while the other half belongs to a man from Oklahoma.

One day, while out for a walk in the woods, the Oklahoma man comes across a wolf caught in a trap. He rushes back to his house and calls his neighbor.

?There's one of your wolves caught in a trap on my side of the forest.?

?How do you know it's one of our wolves?? the farmer asked.

Well, the man replied, he's already chewed off three of his legs and he's still trapped.


Q: What do a divorce in Texas, a tornado in Arkansas, and a Hurricane in Florida have in common?

A: Somebody's fixin' to lose a trailer.


Q: What's the difference between a cheerleader in Texas and a
catfish?

A: One stinks and has whiskers, and the other one is a fish.

Fixed.....

Try again :roll:

Done

 

[tyler811]

Originally posted by: woowoo
All in good fun my friend.....

No I am from Michigan

 

[AdamK47]

I live in Cincinnati, so it's always a negative if you hear someone say "That guy must live in Kentucky". My wife says it to me all the time when she notices someone fitting the stereotype.

 

[gsellis]

You know the St. John's River in Florida flows north, right? That is because Georgia sucks.

You know that all the trees in west Georgia lean to the west, right? That is because Alabama sucks.

 

[jupiter57]

I'm from Kentucky

I know, I know, this is an old one, but no thread of this type is complete without it:

Q: In Kentucky, when 2 people get divorced, are they still brother and sister?
(I was actually asked this once, though in jest of course!)