Sounds like your gf is right; you don't pay enough attention to her. You say your life has a busy schedule with so many things to do that you can't spend more time with her. Yet you have time to play these stupid mind games and it seems like you're prepared to invest even more time to get "proof" of her cheating on you. You even take the time to post this ridiculous thread on ATOT. I think you're just BSing yourself and her. Her cheating has no excuse but maybe she's a little right about her complaint regarding your attention. Maybe if you gave her the attention that you're giving your relationship now, when things are bad, things might be different.
On what jjones said... it sounds to me as though you're giving her more than enough of your time, and giving up most of your free time, at that. No shame. There is never an excuse or justification for cheating.
Bog that... He is trying to secure a future for both of them by finishing college so he can get a better job than a 7/11 or McDonalds employee, how is that wrong?
I agree.... I think she's just playing around with others while he works his ass off !
He has to move on ...
He has to move on ...
Dude, this is classic stuff here. First, I wanted to tell you not to COMPLETELY trust what someone is telling you, but to try and verify this information. It's happened before, people are wrong, or just lying for some hidden motive.
But after reading what you said in the above quote, I'm leaning more towards believing that her friend is telling the truth. If she really asked 'what's more important, her or school' than you're dealing with a highly immature girl who is very insecure and thus believes your world should revolve around her and she cannot stand that it doesn't.
Dude, I've been there, with someone who was EXACTLY like your GF. Can I give you some advice? Run - do not walk - RUN away from this girl before you go and do something stupid...like trying to please her. Doubt that I know what I'm talking about? Well, let me tell you what will happen, and then you can decide for yourself.
Her friend has already given me the clue, she will try to blame all this on you, its all your fault she did this, she already blamed you to some extent by telling her friend 'he doesn't spend enough time with me'. Well, the loser she is cheating on you with does have time for her, because he is a loser and doesn't have any ambitions or isn't trying to make something of his life. At least, he has the time today for her, he'll get tired of her and move on to better things.
Do not make the mistake I did, which was I fell for that two bit bullsh-t line that 'you don't spend enough time with me'. So what did I do? I dropped my class load and a bunch of other stuff like totally severing all contact with my friends just for her. STUPID! Why was it stupid? Because it wasn't enough, it was never enough.
Women with these types of insecurities have them and it has NOTHING to do with you. This is ALL about her. You didn't cause them, and you cannot 'cure' them. Nothing you could do will make her feel better or more secure, because you're not the cause of her insecurity. You'll only end-up going the extra mile for her, and then some, and it will solve nothing. What it will result in is pain, anguish, resentment, and bitterness.
But, people tried to tell me the same thing and I didn't listen to them. So, you may have to learn the hard way like me. Its a tough lesson, pal, better put on your coarse exterior cuz you're going to get burned hard.
I wouldnt have a problem if she had told me she wanted to break things off because i dont have time for her. but for her to go behind my back and do this is just wrong!
Danm right!!! how is it wrong?!?!?!?!?!?!i can understand if i was ignoring her and stuff like that, but becuz i am TRYING to make the relationship work along with handling the crap that comes with school and everyday life doesnt justify her reasoning for just giong out and finding someone else to entertain her.
tscenter has some good advice, heed his words well. I dated a girl exactly like what he was talking about for almost a year, broke up with her last October... I'm still recovering socially, economically, and emotionally.
lilcam - it sounds to me as if you've already made your decision, regardless of the proof of cheating.
My advice? Never thought I'd say this... break it off now, while you still have the cojones to do it, and before she drags you back in... she sounds like a manipulator... get out now.
You'll be better for it in the end.
<--- realizing he did almost a 180, but with good reason.
My advice? Never thought I'd say this... break it off now, while you still have the cojones to do it, and before she drags you back in... she sounds like a manipulator... get out now.
You'll be better for it in the end.
<--- realizing he did almost a 180, but with good reason.
Nothing wrong with trying to better your future; I'm just pointing out the obvious. Suddenly he has time now to invest in his relationship where he didn't have it before? I'm not excusing her cheating; I'm just saying maybe she has a point to her complaint. How she dealt with it is immature but that doesn't nullify the complaint. And BTW, these are the things that make up many marriage difficulties; not the cheating but the lack of attention. You better learn how to deal with it and prioritize your life if you're going to have a successful married relationship.
exactly...i asked her so many times why she isnt in school and she gives me some BS about money. does she really think the millions of college students out there have any money? no, we go through the 4+ years utilizing loans and grants and whatever money our parents have saved up. her excuse for not getting a loan is that she doesnt wanna have any debt. I think I would rather take my 20,000+ debt and a high paying job rather than one that pays $7/hr and have nothing against my name
Jane told me the guy she's seeing is the type to just use the girl and leave. I've seen his brother and the way he treats Mary is horrible. Yet mary stays with him. go figure right?!?!?! anyways, sooner or later he'll leave and she'll come running back to me.
no way in hell am I dropping anything to please her. At first I took one class for summer 1 so that I could spend time with her. I thought about what I would have to go through during the fall with the extra class, I figured I better take it now so that I could get it over with. That way my fall load would be much less of a burden. I'll be graduating this fall!
"What about me?!" Thats all I hear from her?! What about me who has to deal with school, finding a job, stress at home. Does that count for anything?
He already is devoting a large portion of his time to the relationship. As in, spending most of his free time with her.
You only wasted a year of your life? Pshaw! It took me SIX (!6!) years to come to my senses. Just a glutton for punishment...I guess.
Generally, no... there are people like this everywhere. Just your mistfortune that you dated her.
man...that would be freaking scary!!! i dont think she's pregnant. remember when i mentioned she's been stress?!
well, we now know why?!?!?!?!
lol It's difficult... also realizing that she was emotionally abusive and manipulative. It's difficult to break off a relationship like that... but well worth it in the end.
Good luck dude.
Women never make any sense.
So, depending on the situation, she may have just made a mistake, or this may just tell you something about the kind of person that she really is. You'll have to figure out which one.
jeremy806
Women never make any sense.
So, depending on the situation, she may have just made a mistake, or this may just tell you something about the kind of person that she really is. You'll have to figure out which one.
jeremy806
They can... just gotta give it time and effort, and allow them their week of fury a month.
So true. Again, godspeed, I'm out for some more sleep.
pillage2001
Lifer
- Sep 18, 2000
- 14,038
- 1
- 81
This thread actually went up to this far?? This a no brainer man, she's letting guys screw her behind your back! She likes to play hard ball dude. Play it with her. Throw the towel at her and move on. Like gopunk say, no melodramatic stuff! Just f@rking dump her already!!
Of course, it's within his right to leave...which is what he should do now. I'm normally all about being respectful to girls but if you're sure about it, throw it in her face somehow...cheaters suck ass :disgust:
Something I have to figure out. I think if it were me, I would ask her for forgiveness. I can see how it's a mistake on her part becuz of me, but....
Aye... I understand your thought process, because I used to think that way, too....
THERE IS NEVER AN EXCUSE FOR CHEATING. EVER.
It is her responsibility to fess up to you and ask forgiveness, and regain your trust. While you can be forgiving, you shouldn't feel any guilt. From what you've described, you've done nothing wrong.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
No matter what happens, do NOT let her convince you that this is your fault :Q
TRENDING THREADS
-
Discussion Zen 5 Speculation (EPYC Turin and Strix Point/Granite Ridge - Ryzen 9000)- Started by DisEnchantment
- Replies: 25K
-
Discussion Intel Meteor, Arrow, Lunar & Panther Lakes + WCL Discussion Threads
- Started by Tigerick
- Replies: 23K
-
Discussion Intel current and future Lakes & Rapids thread- Started by TheF34RChannel
- Replies: 23K
-
-
Facebook
Twitter