(Joke) Insanely Stupid Corprate Newsletter from Chick-Fil-A

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
Edit: 2 This JOKE ARTICLE was included in an actual corporate newsletter. (Probably local to this particular C-F-A) Many people in this thread assumed I thought this was REAL.

The fact that the CEO from C-F-A would fire 6 people to make up for 10% in profit loss, and the absolute shit grammar was enough for me to understand this was not a REAL article. It was a display of some of the worst judgment I've seen in a long time. (OK, worst LOCAL judgment)

I guess I could have been a bit more clear about my reason for posting this. (The manger was an assface for including this JOKE.)

That said, here's the transcript, followed by the scan of the actual newletter obtained from an employee of the restaurant.

Warning! What you read is not meant to be taken literally! It's joke!

Hope that covers it.

A Letter from the Boss

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barack Obama is our president and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way. To compensate for these increases, or prices would have to increase by about 10%

But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are a family here and I don't know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I waled through our parking lot and found six 'Obama' bumper stickers on our employee's cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for a change, and I can give it to them.




This from the South Bend, Indiana location. I'll scan the newsletter later tonight.

At least it makes it easier to choose where to to eat.

Edit: No, I don't think this is serious. Just seriously poor judgement to put this into a corporate newsletter.

Linky

Edit 3. fixed link

Title edited to reflect joke status. Thread locked due to massive derailing.
-Schadenfroh (AT Mod)

 

Fern

Elite Member
Sep 30, 2003
26,907
173
106
Originally posted by: Ns1
this can't be forreal

^this

Chic-Fil-A is a good company, they are always helping out in the community and supporting school- age kids and their programs (soccor, bands, whatever). Don't bash 'em please.

Fern
 

Vette73

Lifer
Jul 5, 2000
21,503
8
0
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
In before the spam-lock

Yep, I don;t care if it is anti-dem or anti-republican these chain mails are just dumb and should be insta-ban for anybody dumb enough to post them.
 

TechBoyJK

Lifer
Oct 17, 2002
16,701
60
91
Originally posted by: DefDC
A Letter from the Boss

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barack Obama is our president and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way. To compensate for these increases, or prices would have to increase by about 10%

But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are a family here and I don't know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I waled through our parking lot and found six 'Obama' bumper stickers on our employee's cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for a change, and I can give it to them.




This from the South Bend, Indiana location. I'll scan the newsletter later tonight.

At least it makes it easier to choose where to to eat.

WOW. the "so i went outside and looked for the cars with obama bumerp stickers" story has been retold so many times now, its not evne funny.

i'm truly sorry if you believed this.

 

halik

Lifer
Oct 10, 2000
25,696
1
0
OMG can get an AOL email address too, so I can get my own chain mails? Pppplease?
 

aphex

Moderator<br>All Things Apple
Moderator
Jul 19, 2001
38,572
2
91
Thats about as fake as they come for multiple reasons.
 

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
This came from an employee at this location. I'm holding the actual newletter. (Scanning as we speak..)

I guess I should have mentioned that I didn't think this was serious, as the 5th grade grammar might indicate. I think it was meant to sound "snarky", but holy crap it's mean spirited... And intimidation on their employees...

Oh, and a certain German leader was kind to dogs, but it's ok to call him an asshole...

 

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
Originally posted by: tfcmasta97
Even if it was true, those fired would be able to sue for a good chunk of change.

I don't think it's meant to be serious, but to put something that stupid in your business newletter certainly leaves that option for any dismissed employees.

 

OCGuy

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
27,227
36
91
Originally posted by: DefDC
This came from an employee at this location. I'm holding the actual newletter. (Scanning as we speak..)

I guess I should have mentioned that I didn't think this was serious, as the 5th grade grammar might indicate. I think it was meant to sound "snarky", but holy crap it's mean spirited... And intimidation on their employees...

Oh, and a certain German leader was kind to dogs, but it's ok to call him an asshole...

Hey, did you know the word gullible isnt in the dictionary?
 

Ns1

No Lifer
Jun 17, 2001
55,413
1,570
126
Origins: The item quoted above originally hit the snopes.com inbox on the morning of 5 November 2008, little more than 14 hours after the polls had closed on the previous day's
U.S. presidential election. The first person we received it from said "This was sent to me by a Republican friend less than one hour after Obama won," an assertion that, if accurate, puts paid to the notion of the e-mail's being the real thing, as there wouldn't have been time for any employer disappointed by the election returns to have taken a tour of his company's parking lot to count bumper stickers and then fire off a memo to all his employees. (This item likely was written before the election, with the "I have resigned myself" line referencing an expected future event rather than a fait accompli, but it didn't see wide circulation until immediately after the election results were known.)

We don't know who wrote the e-mail or that person's purpose for doing so, but the piece appears to be a political jab aimed at those who voted for (or were about to vote for) Barack Obama. The e-mail's original incarnation was not attributed to any particular person or business entity; its complimentary closing of "Sincerely" was not followed by any identification of the signer. Subsequently, the item (variously titled "Layoffs" or "Letter From the Boss") has been circulated with a variety of people listed as the memo's writer, including:

* Aaron Templeton of Providence Property & Casualty

* Kelly Herrod of Herrod Technology, Inc.

* Carrie Trowbridge Law of InTrowVision Strategic Marketing LLC

* Bob Shadix of Ace Investigations

* Dan Remely of H-Squared Properties Inc.

The "Aaron Templeton" version (which is the most widespread, according to our inbox) is often prefaced thusly:
My 20 yr old niece works for a little insurance company in San Francisco. This is an actual email the CFO of the company sent out to all the employees.
One of the people to whom the screed was falsely attributed spoke to the press about it. Dan Remely, president of H-Squared Properties Inc., a Pittsburgh company that manages real estate holdings, said: "We didn't lay anybody off. We didn't fire anybody." His company, by the way, employs two dozen people, not the 140 claimed in the e-mail.

Barbara "letter of discontent" Mikkelson

Last updated: 14 December 2008

The URL for this page is http://www.snopes.com/politics/business/layoff.asp

Urban Legends Reference Pages © 1995-2009 by Barbara and David P. Mikkelson.
This material may not be reproduced without permission.
snopes and the snopes.com logo are registered service marks of snopes.com.


Sources:

Belser, Ann. "Local Businessman an Innocent Victim of Obama Layoff Hoax."
Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. 21 November 2008.
 

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
Originally posted by: Fern
Originally posted by: Ns1
this can't be forreal

^this

Chic-Fil-A is a good company, they are always helping out in the community and supporting school- age kids and their programs (soccor, bands, whatever). Don't bash 'em please.

Fern

This manager is an a-hole to think that's acceptable. I don't trust his judgement on ANYTHING now, much less my food. I certainly will tell people to avoid that restaurant like the plague.

And I'm not being an Obama fanboy... Our local Dairy Queen is run buy a guy who constantly leave FISCALLY right wing messages around his restaurant. I don't have a problem with that.. It's America, and he can say what he likes... But to even joke to your employees that you'd FIRE them for a political bumper sticker is being a ... evil shithead? Yeah.. That's about right...
 

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
Originally posted by: DefDC
This came from an employee at this location. I'm holding the actual newletter. (Scanning as we speak..)

I guess I should have mentioned that I didn't think this was serious, as the 5th grade grammar might indicate. I think it was meant to sound "snarky", but holy crap it's mean spirited... And intimidation on their employees...

Oh, and a certain German leader was kind to dogs, but it's ok to call him an asshole...

Hey, did you know the word gullible isnt in the dictionary?

*sigh* Miss the point much?
 

JS80

Lifer
Oct 24, 2005
26,271
7
81
Originally posted by: DefDC
A Letter from the Boss

As the CEO of this organization, I have resigned myself to the fact that Barack Obama is our president and that our taxes and government fees will increase in a BIG way. To compensate for these increases, or prices would have to increase by about 10%

But since we cannot increase our prices right now due to the dismal state of the economy, we will have to lay off six of our employees instead. This has really been bothering me, since I believe we are a family here and I don't know how to choose who would have to go.

So, this is what I did. I waled through our parking lot and found six 'Obama' bumper stickers on our employee's cars and have decided these folks will be the ones to let go. I can't think of a more fair way to approach this problem. They voted for a change, and I can give it to them.




This from the South Bend, Indiana location. I'll scan the newsletter later tonight.

At least it makes it easier to choose where to to eat.

fake, but :thumbsup: x100
 

OCGuy

Lifer
Jul 12, 2000
27,227
36
91
Originally posted by: DefDC
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
Originally posted by: DefDC
This came from an employee at this location. I'm holding the actual newletter. (Scanning as we speak..)

I guess I should have mentioned that I didn't think this was serious, as the 5th grade grammar might indicate. I think it was meant to sound "snarky", but holy crap it's mean spirited... And intimidation on their employees...

Oh, and a certain German leader was kind to dogs, but it's ok to call him an asshole...

Hey, did you know the word gullible isnt in the dictionary?

*sigh* Miss the point much?

.......

Im nominating this thread for 2009 self-ownage of the year
 

DefDC

Golden Member
Aug 28, 2003
1,858
1
81
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
Originally posted by: DefDC
Originally posted by: Ocguy31
Originally posted by: DefDC
This came from an employee at this location. I'm holding the actual newletter. (Scanning as we speak..)

I guess I should have mentioned that I didn't think this was serious, as the 5th grade grammar might indicate. I think it was meant to sound "snarky", but holy crap it's mean spirited... And intimidation on their employees...

Oh, and a certain German leader was kind to dogs, but it's ok to call him an asshole...

Hey, did you know the word gullible isnt in the dictionary?

*sigh* Miss the point much?

.......

Im nominating this thread for 2009 self-ownage of the year

Self nomination?
 

OrByte

Diamond Member
Jul 21, 2000
9,302
144
106
Chik Filet is a pretty good company, a model company.

How did they get drawn into political bashing?!

That's not right.