JEFF FOXWORTHY ON NEW ENGLAND

[Red Dawn]

If you consider it a sport to gather your food by drilling
through 36 inches of ice and sitting there all day hoping that the
food will swim by, you might live in New England.

If you're proud that your region makes the national news 96
nights each year because Mt. Washington is the coldest spot in the
nation, and Boston gets more snow than any other major city in the
US,
you might live in New England.

If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May,
you might live in New England

If you instinctively walk like a penguin for six months out of
the year, you might live in New England.

If someone in a Home Depot store offers you assistance, and
they don't work there, you might live in New England.

If your dad's suntan stops at a line curving around the middle of his
forehead, you might live in New England.

If you have worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you might
live in New England.

If your town has more bars than churches, you might live in New
England.

If you have had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone
who dialed a wrong number, you might live in New England.

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A TRUE NEW ENGLANDER WHEN:
1. "Vacation" means going South past New York City for the
weekend.
2. You measure distance in hours.
3. You know several people who have hit a deer more than once.
4. You often switch from "heat" to "A/C" in the same day and
back again.
5. You can drive 65 mph through 2 feet of snow during a raging
blizzard, without flinching.
6. You see people wearing camouflage at social events
(including weddings).
7. You install security lights on your house and garage and
leave both unlocked.
8. You carry jumper cables in your car and your girlfriend /
wife knows how to use them.
9. You design your kid's Halloween costume to fit over a
snowsuit.
10. Driving is better in the winter because the potholes are
filled with snow.
11. You know all 4 seasons: almost winter, winter, still
winter, and road construction.
12. You can identify a southern or eastern accent.
13. Your idea of creative landscaping is a statue of a deer
next to your blue spruce.
14. You were unaware that there is a legal drinking age.
15. Down South to you means Philadelphia.
16. A brat is something you eat.
17. Your neighbor throws a party to celebrate his new shed.
18. You go out for a fish fry every Friday.
19. Your 4th of July picnic was moved indoors due to frost.
20. You have more miles on your snow blower than your car.
21. You find 10 degrees "a little chilly."
22. You actually understand these jokes, and you forward them
to all your New England friends.
Sad....but true!!!

 

[Bassyhead]

heh nice

 

[Amused]

Heh, most of those apply to the midwest.

 

[Anubis]

i have lived in NE most of my life, im now in boston, those are pretty funny

"2. You measure distance in hours"
is that a NE thing? because i do it and i thought it was just me

 

[Red Dawn]

Originally posted by: Anubis
i have lived in NE most of my life, im now in boston, those are pretty funny

"2. You measure distance in hours"
is that a NE thing? because i do it and i thought it was just me

Massachusetts is about the size of some of our counties in CA.

 

[spaceman]

WTG JEEOFFF!

 

[Anubis]

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: Anubis
i have lived in NE most of my life, im now in boston, those are pretty funny

"2. You measure distance in hours"
is that a NE thing? because i do it and i thought it was just me

Massachusetts is about the size of some of our counties in CA.

and how does that answer my question??

i drive to St Louis from where my rents live in NY and i refer to it as a 13 hour drive,

hell every distance i refer to in hours no matter how long it is

 

[shilala]

Originally posted by: Anubis

Originally posted by: Red Dawn

Originally posted by: Anubis
i have lived in NE most of my life, im now in boston, those are pretty funny

"2. You measure distance in hours"
is that a NE thing? because i do it and i thought it was just me

Massachusetts is about the size of some of our counties in CA.

and how does that answer my question??

i drive to St Louis from where my rents live in NY and i refer to it as a 13 hour drive,

hell every distance i refer to in hours no matter how long it is

The wife: How far is it to Jerry's house?
Me: About 2 1/2 hours for me, about an hour and 45 minutes for you.

I have no idea how far in miles anything is. I've never had anyone say to me "it's about 75 miles". I wasn't aware that driving distances were even judged in miles.
60 miles down Rt. 119 takes 2 hours. 60 miles down I-80 takes 45 minutes.
What use is distance?

 

[jadinolf]

Since I am from New England (CT) I can relate to this.

Good job, Mike.

 

[SpunkyJones]

Originally posted by: Anubis
i have lived in NE most of my life, im now in boston, those are pretty funny

"2. You measure distance in hours"
is that a NE thing? because i do it and i thought it was just me

Its not just you, most people I know talk in hours more often than not. I live about 10 minutes outside of Boston. 🙂_

 

[jonnyGURU]

Anywhere near Waltham? 😉

In reference to "If your local Dairy Queen is closed from September through May": I was just up there doing IT work and an install in East Providence, RI.

What's funny is I got a hotel w/o a frig. I like to keep a 6-pack in the hotel room for when I get back from a job. During the summer, I can go to a store and buy a little Igloo and fill it with ice, but during the winter, I couldn't because "they only sell them in the summer."

Huh?!?!

So people don't need to keep things cold in the other seasons? As high as everyone has the heat cranked up (you'd think these folks were native Jamaicans!) I figured you'd want an Igloo to keep everything else cold.

This last time, it snowed like hell and there was a hole in the screen of my hotel room's window, so I just shoved the beer in the snow and reached out the window to grab them.