Its over

[Cknyc]

I just finished off my relationship with my ex. We broke up 6 months ago and tried to talk but things turned ugly. Almost an all out insult war. Anyway things are over. Im sad to say. I emailed her suggesting that we one day become friends a long time from now and to wish her good luck on future endeavors. Well now thats that is over I can finally get some work done...


Something I have learned, break up nicely. It doesnt pay to be a jerk or to throw insults around. Its better to be on good terms than on bad. At least it makes me feel better knowing that we are still o nfriendly terms.

Some background we were together for 5 years and she broke things off in may. I began talking to her again and she led me on without telling me that she was seeing someone else.

 

[Isla]

May you move forward in peace and with healing, and may you be blessed again with love in the future.

 

[geno]

5 years?? Damn...must've been tough on you, sorry to hear it. But hey, life goes on, I'm sure you'll find someone even better sooner or later. Good luck man!

 

[Locutus of Board]

Pic, her phone #?

 

[Cknyc]

locutus, I have a pic but i doubt she would appreciate me posting it. Its not naked or anything. If it were it would be on the net already.

 

[Wangel]

Just laugh when you see her with another guy!

 

[kami]

sorry to hear that...5 years is a long time. but i'm sure you'll find someone right for you

 

[Cknyc]

I probably will laugh to some extent but thats not the way to go about it. From what i have learned thus far..

 

[CinderElmo]

You probably are better off anyway, but if she was "coming back around" to you it probably meant she was trying to remember if things were really that bad with you so she could compare that feeling to her new guy. I used to play it cool in situations like that and BS about how great I was doing these days, seeing some gals, etc...just playing cool. Then she doubts herself and her plan bites her in the a$$...

Of course I am generalizing, but I hate to see a good guy get the 'ol beat down like you did.

Good luck, enjoy your freedom for now!

 

[nickdakick]

<< Something I have learned, break up nicely. It doesnt pay to be a jerk or to throw insults around >>


That's exactly how my wife split up with her ex-husband. It was the most peaceful and friendly(is this possible?) divorce you can imagine. The kids aren't suffering, everything is just &quot;cool running&quot;. I know this isn't easy to do and sometimes just impossible but for the sake of all involved, at least try.
Sorry to hear that though.

 

[StageLeft]

Cknyc Everclear - now that its over

Download that song it will sound like how you guys were after breaking up

 

[Regine]

Sorry to hear about that. 5 years is a long time.

But I wish you luck and happiness for the future!!!

 

[Cknyc]

Cinderelmo,
I thought the same and I did play it cool. I just fudged and said a few things that I shouldnt have. Mostly about the guy cause I have known him since HS. I never liked him much but never had anything against him. Until I got with my ex cause he was her first BF and he tried to break us up I felt whenever he could..

All I said was that the guy is dirty and a sleeze and isnt successfull. I scored the home run when I said that if we got bakc together I would ask her to get tested.. She said that made her feel dirty.. Oh well my bad.. I do hope someday we could become friends because I trully loved this girl and I always will to some extent... First loves are hardest to get over.. By the way im only 22 if anyone was wondering...

 

[Cknyc]

I appreciate everyones support..

 

[CinderElmo]

Yeah I figured there was a lot more too your story. It does suck when you got some leech trying to break you up and then finally succeeding! Sounds like you did the right thing...the testing bit really gave her something to think about. If &quot;it made her feel dirty&quot; it is probably because there is some truth to it

Sorry things turned south, but it sounds like you are coming out of the woods pretty good!

 

[MickySoft]

5 years isn't that long to me, but I am just feeling a little bored now.
Any suggestion to keep the fire burning?
BTW, Cknyc wish you the best, I know it's not easy...

 

[BoberFett]

Sorry to hear it cknyc. Look on the bright side, you're young. You've got a long life ahead of you full of interesting people.

 

[tim0thy]

it's interesting that noone thought this up. just be glad you didn't find this out when you two are married with kids and a mortgage to pay off. no, this isn't my situation, but that's how i took it when my girl of three years went bye bye.

 

[Cknyc]

I agree. If we stayed together I would have gotten engaged to her within 3 years. I sure would not want to find out anything like that then...

 

[Yo Ma Ma]

Five years is especially long since you started at 17, sorry for your loss, it sounds like you're doing pretty well.

 

[The Stigenator]

consider it your good fortune. I had a similar thing in HS. I was going out with this girl, she was relatively unknown until I started to date her. When people got to see her around me they got intersted. One of my classmates did and he stole her from me the aftermath she said She would never want to see me ever again (dont ask me.. I dont know anything on why she said that, I wasnt even around.. she didnt even tell me directly.. it came to me from another &quot;girl friend&quot. It took me 4 years to get over her properly and to figure out what happened, but when it did I realised.. I was lucky not being with her. She got pregnent by this guy and then.. things went down hill from there. I am going back to India this december we will see what happens this time.

She still wont talk to me though friends tell me that she talks about &quot;the days&quot;.

They bad boys might good girls, however there are girls who find the &quot;Sweet&quot;, &quot;friendly&quot;, &quot;caring&quot; all around &quot;good guy&quot; to be attractive.. I waited for it.. and I have someone who just appreciates a all around nice guy.

 

[DanC]

Try 12....
You'll find another one - she'll be better than the last, and everything you had - you'll have again, only it'll be newer.

 

[Cknyc]

Great Story The_Good_Guy, She'll be talking about the good old days Im sure. I expect similar things to occur.. You should talk to her, let her grovel and beg for forgiveness. I sure hope it doesnt take me 4 years to get over her. I still love her and probably always will, but I have come along way in 6 months. I still feel for her and things I hear about her.

DanC whats the 12 in reference to?

 

[Cknyc]

Something I still do is I speak with references of her. For example when talking about going places I ll say I went there because she wanted to buy something....etc..

 

[The Stigenator]

cknyc.. that's all part of the deal with the break up. I had it too..
You go shopping .. and you realise that what you used to do when you went there. However that will go away. First you have the feeling of lonliness then anger then remose.. however dont let it bother you. I didnt. I do plan to talk to her or atleast meet her when I go down there. She is going to be cringing for &quot;why did I have to break up?&quot;...

Frankly what you are going thru is something I have gone through already.. so if you need any help.. PM (private message me).