It's Halloween, I'm home alone and need to poop.

[Annisman*]

What should I do ? there's nobody else to hand out candy while I'm taking a crap. is this fear irrational ?

 

[nakedfrog]

Turn the lights off?

 

[Imp]

Leave a bowl of candy by the door. Leave a note saying to take one only.

Return.

Lose faith in humanity.

 

[Schmide]

Poop in bushes. Jump out grab candy.

 

[Annisman*]

Turn the lights off?

It's not even dark yet, kids everywhere

 

[dave_the_nerd]

To hell with the kids and candy. Shit on your porch.

 

[dainthomas]

It's not even dark yet, kids everywhere

Daylight savings time should always end before Halloween just for this reason.

And OP should put on some Depends.

 

[Annisman*]

Daylight savings time should always end before Halloween just for this reason.

And OP should put on some Depends.

Lol wtf

 

[shortylickens]

5:45, just had one little rascal.

Basic witch costume. Nothing fancy. Not scary.

 

[nakedfrog]

I think we have a winner, folks.

Combine:

To hell with the kids and candy. Shit on your porch.

With:

Leave a bowl of candy by the door. Leave a note saying to take one only.

Return.

Lose faith in humanity.

 

[Exterous]

To hell with the kids and candy. Shit on your porch.

Be sure to maintain eye contact with the kids as they walk by

 

[zinfamous]

Leave a bowl of candy by the door. Leave a note saying out to poop, take one candy only.

Return.

Lose faith in humanity.

ftfy

 

[Rumpltzer]

Leave front door open. Take candy bowl with you. Leave bathroom door open.

No brainer!

 

[PottedMeat]

how are your pinching skills? there should be enough to give each in a small group a decent tootsie roll.

 

[Red Squirrel]

Only had one trick or treater tonight, then I had to come in to work. More candy for me!

I'll be sure to wait about a week and then go raid Walmart for any left overs on sale.

As for bathroom I would just close the light, go do the deed then reopen the light.

 

[shortylickens]

Did everything come out all right?

 

[Annisman*]

Did everything come out all right?

Yes it was a 10 to 15 minute poop I think it all came out pretty well. I ended up just closing the door and turning off the light and hoping no kids sat knocking at my door while I dropped a duece. Did any kids come while I was on the pot ? we will never know for sure...

 

[highland145]

10 to 15? Dude, get some fiber.

Be sure to maintain eye contact with the kids as they walk by