It's funny what'll make you cry . . .

[Perknose]

I just ran into the movie Forrest Gump playing on my newly hooked up Dish Network satellite service. It brought tears to my eyes. Gump's enduring love for Jenny just tugged at my hearstrings, as well as Gump's buddy Bubba dying in his arms in a fire fight in Nam.

I lost a huge number of people I knew in Nam, several of which I had been pretty damn close to. Every year, in remembrance, my long time buddy Steve would fly out from LA around July 4th, and we'd drive down to Washington in all the Summer heat and humidity and visit the Wall.

Last year, I couldn't go because my wife Jessie was in the hospital. She never came home. She was 43.

This last year has been a bad year, a lost year, a sad year. I didn't even go down to Washington this year. Steve understood.

Life goes on. The damn river of life keeps on flowing whether you want it to or not.

Here's to my wife Jessie, the love of my life, who took her last breath on July 26th, 2001. She was as fine a person as you'd ever, ever hope to meet on this good green Earth.

Here's to the brave young men -- boys, mostly -- who gave their lives for the United States of America, may they never be forgotten.

It's funny sometimes what will make you break down and cry.

Here's to life.

 

[Mill]

All I can say is that I understand. Little things trigger memories of my father, even though he died ten years ago. Sept 11. was a tough time for me because my father died in a plane crash. I understand the emotions that a movie like Forrest Gump can bring out. I hate watching any movies about planes. Also certain war movies that I watched with my father bring tears.

All I can say is that you are not alone and that your display of emotion is very healthy. While your wounds are fresh and will never completely heal, you will gain so much strength through your loss. My sympathies are with you. One thing I urge you not to do is to ponder why. I wasted ten years asking why, instead of concentrating on remembering the good.

Evan

 

[Adul]

 

[spanky]

sorry... just read the whole post

 

[pyonir]

Wow, nice post Perknose. I know it isn't the same, but back home my sister's dog was hit and killed by a car on monday. I wasn't very close to the dog, but my mom and sister were and i really worry about them. I have lost friends in my short time on earth here (only 24) so i know what it is like to lose someone very close to you unexpectedly.

I'm not sure if you've seen this, but i'm gonna link you to a painting i have at home. Your mention of Vietnam and the wall ran my memory and this is the first thing i thought of. Reflections

Take care of yourself.

 

[Swag1138]

All I can say is: wow.

Excellent post, Perknose.

 

[308nato]

My dad raised me to believe that men don't cry. Now that I am middle aged and he is an old fart, both our lives are much better since we figured out that was wrong. And your right, once you drop that macho bullsh!t (unless its necessary at the time ) its amazing what can be felt that wasn't allowed before.

I wish that I could get my dad to go to DC with me to go to the Korean War monument together but I don't think its ever going to happen. Its only been the last few years he's really talked about what he did and saw there, before it was only the lighthearted anecdotes I ever heard.

The first time I saw it was at night. It was drizzling a little and you could not tell the "patrol" wasn't really a bunch of young scared kids trudging through the mist in a far away place. I am not ashamed to tell you I dropped to my knees and lost it totally. I forgave my dad for a lot of things right then and there.

To life. It does get better with age.

 

[Smaulz]

jeez, buzzkill man... but seriously... nice post. My most sincerest condolences on the loss of your wife last year, I really don't know what I'd do without mine. The very fact that you're still alive and kicking makes me think you're a much better man than I.

And yes, you're right, it's kinda funny what triggers emotions within us. I don't even want to go into some of the things that would set me off last year when I was going through some rough stuff. But one thing I've found is that yes, sometimes the tears are necessary, and even welcome, but don't forget all the cool stuff in this world. There's still alot to be happy about.

 

[Jeffwo]

My condolences.

All I can say is, "Hang in there man, it'll get better"!!!

Jeff

 

[BigPotato]

...

 

I consider myself really lucky that I haven't had to go through anything like you've had to.

You're right, though - the things that make me cry are the least-expected. I wrote my girlfriend a letter for Valentine's day and by the time I finished it and signed my name, I was bawling. Granted, that's not the type of crying you're talking about, but it's roughly along the same lines.

I begged my parents to take me to DC this summer to see the mall and all the memorials, because I consider myself pretty detached from much of American history, and I wanted to experience it as firsthand as I could. My mom's terrified of airplanes though (always has been), so the trip's been postponed yet another year.

The people I know who have been to the Vietnam Memorial Wall say that once you get there, it doesn't matter if you had a brother, or a dad, a son, or even no one who died in 'Nam - it still brings out the strongest emotions we've got.

I'm sorry for your losses, Perknose. But, the river of life does flow on; you're right. And sooner or later, you'll find something that reminds you of your wife, or of your friends who were lost in Vietnam, and it'll make you laugh out loud because it's so silly or funny.

Life's like that. Keep your chin up.

 

[TallBill]

to life bud

 

[spartacuskzm]

Perk,

That's one of the most meaningful, true posts I've ever read.

I lost my father when I was six and a girlfriend to leukemia 4 years ago - she was 25. Its hard - very hard.

When I was younger, watching the WWII and Vietnam movies, to me it was simply about watching us kill more of them. Since then I've come to hate the thought of war (though it's sometimes necessary and I'm 110% behind our troops), and I can't help but think that every soldier killed in action, on every side, has parents and friends that loved them and perhaps children that will never see them again. The whole thing is just brutal.....

It's amazing what we take for granted, and your post just reminded me not to....

My condolences.....and yes, here's to life.

Derek

 

[J3anyus]

Great post...

I lost my best friend to a car accident when I was 15...I was still too young to realize what that meant, but now, a couple years later, it still gets me, all the time. Knowing that anyone can just disappear so quickly, so randomly...jesus.

Here's to life. Just keep on going, no matter what gets in your way.

 

[ohtwell]

<---- Hugs Perknose!!

Sorry to hear about all the loses you have suffered.

It takes a real man to express his emotions so openly.




: ) Amanda

 

[MazerRackham]

Excellent post and thread guys

My dad died from cancer, 10 years ago this coming November 20th. It doesn't seem that long ago to me, but at other times it does. I don't know how I feel somethimes. Anyway, I also recently learned that a couple guys I played high school football with (Pasadena, CA) were shot to death a while back. I hadn't actually kept in touch with those guys, but I have many fond memories of them and I miss 'em. I think they got themselves into some gang-related stuff, and that's what got them shot.

I'm 28 now, and if I've learned anything it's that you can't give up, no matter what happens. Anyway, this is my most serious post on ATOT yet; I usually only respond to the funny/weird things on here, but this time I had to reply and be part of this thread. Thanks for the post Perknose, and I hope that you and all the rest of you guys a feeling okay.

Hey, the sun will come out tomorrow, right?

 

[stonecold3169]

When I was a junior in highschool, one of my best friends commited suicide in the same location his mother had 10 years earlier...

at my graduation the next year, the father of my friend gave an announcement that he knew I had made his sons time on earth more enjoyable and that he could see a little bit of his son in me, and as of such he endowed me with all of the college funds he had saved for his child... this meant so much to me on so many levels that I lost it in public, which was unusual because I'm usually stern as a rock when it comes to getting emotional.

 

Originally posted by: stonecold3169
When I was a junior in highschool, one of my best friends commited suicide in the same location his mother had 10 years earlier...

at my graduation the next year, the father of my friend gave an announcement that he knew I had made his sons time on earth more enjoyable and that he could see a little bit of his son in me, and as of such he endowed me with all of the college funds he had saved for his child... this meant so much to me on so many levels that I lost it in public, which was unusual because I'm usually stern as a rock when it comes to getting emotional.

Wow...great post. I don't blame you, anyone would lose it in that situation.

 

[Rainsford]

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life: it goes on." -Robert Frost