Is this what "Woke" means?

[Viper1j]

Son Called CPS Because Parents Were Watching Tucker Carlson

When he found his parents watching Tucker Carlson he knew what he had to do -- call CPS.

www.alternativelyfacts.com

Son Called CPS Because Parents Were Watching Tucker Carlson

This week, sister publication The Political Garbage Chute reported on quite a noteworthy event. In a small Georgia town, a boy called Child Protective Services. This in and of itself might not be something a news outlet as famous, prestigious, and trustworthy as PGC would publish a story about; however, the reasoning behind the kid’s decision to turn his parents was certainly worth telling readers about.

“WE TOOK THE CALL FROM CPS LAST EVENING, AND TWO OF OUR OFFICERS WERE SENT TO LOOK INTO THE REPORT,” DEPUTY SGT. MIGUEL MONTOYA TOLD REPORTERS THIS MORNING. “WHEN THEY ARRIVED, THEY FOUND A YOUNG BOY, WHO TOLD THEM HE HAD BEEN THE ONE TO REPORT HIS PARENTS. APPARENTLY, HE CAUGHT THEM WATCHING TUCKER CARLSON’S SHOW, AND TURNED THEM IN.” (PGC)

According to the report, the boy, who is a minor and therefore his name is not being published, was fearful his parents, having been watching Carlson on Fox News, would “end up angry, rabid racists.” The boy was anxious about his parents perhaps participating in a failed coup attempt, or they might start shouting at people for wearing masks in public to stop the spread of COVID-19.

“I DON’T WANT TO LIVE IN A HOUSE WITH WHITE SUPREMACIST MORONS WHO DON’T UNDERSTAND SOMETHING SIMPLE LIKE WEARING A MASK TO PROTECT OTHERS,” THE BOY WAS QUOTED AS TELLING OFFICERS WHEN THEY ARRIVED ON THE SCENE. “SO WHETHER YOU TAKE ME OUT OF HERE, OR YOU TAKE THEM SOMEWHERE, I DON’T CARE. I JUST WORRY ABOUT THEIR OVERALL MENTAL HEALTH IF THEY KEEP WATCHING TUCKER’S NIGHTLY KLAN RALLIES.” (PGC)

Local authorities are telling the press that this is a rather unusual case, and that there isn’t a clear path forward. The district attorney handling the case said she’s not going to preview any potential prosecution in the media, however she did intimate that she seems some angles she can use to argue that what the parents did by watching Carlson’s show constitutes child endangerment.

“WE DON’T HAVE ANY LAWS SPECIFICALLY ABOUT NOT EXPOSING YOUR KIDS TO TUCKER CARLSON IN THIS STATE,” SMITHVILLE DISTRICT ATTORNEY CAROL KAROLSBY TOLD US. “THAT BEING SAID, IT’S ILLEGAL TO DUMP YOUR KID IN THE SEWER, SO FOR THE SAME REASONS WE’RE GOING TO HOLD THE PARENTS IN CUSTODY UNTIL THE COURTS GET A CHANCE TO LOOK INTO THIS CASE MORE SPECIFICALLY. “WHILE IT’S UNCLEAR EXACTLY WHAT THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND WEEKS HOLD FOR THE FAMILY, GEORGIA LAW STATES THAT THE SON WILL NEED TO REMAIN SEPARATED FROM HIS PARENTS WHILE THE COURTS ADJUDICATE THE SITUATION. (PGC)

Updates will be published to this story as they develop.

P.S. While this is satire, it shouldn't be.

 

[HomerJS]

I like this kid. More brains and decency then the parents.

 

[Viper1j]

I've read stories in the past about kids calling the cops when their parents were doing drugs, but this is a new one.

 

[Lost_in_the_HTTP]

^^^ The drug is called TuckerC and it's a real brain killer.


That said, I don't read all caps, so I skimmed over the quotes.

 

[Moonbeam]

Woke is where one parent slipped and hit her head on a hammer and the other one got electrocuted in the shower using a hair dryer in the shower.

 

[HomerJS]

I've read stories in the past about kids calling the cops when their parents were doing drugs, but this is a new one.

What's more dangerous? Parents smoking pot or being radicalized by Tucker Carlson?

 

[nOOky]

I remember this from 1st grade, read until the very end right?

 

[MomentsofSanity]

I've read stories in the past about kids calling the cops when their parents were doing drugs, but this is a new one.

Nevermind... Seemed some might have thought this real at first! now see the satire note.

 

[HomerJS]

Nevermind... Seemed some might have thought this real at first! now see the satire note.

Damn dude, you just killed my buzz.

 

[BonzaiDuck]

My younger brother called the police because we had an argument and I slammed his bedroom door loudly. When the officer arrived at the door, it took a while to convince him about why the call had been made.

Bro is a bit manic and bi-polar -- can be a real A** sometimes . . .

 

[Viper1j]

Damn dude, you just killed my buzz.

Sorry.

 

[Viper1j]

My younger brother called the police because we had an argument and I slammed his bedroom door loudly. When the officer arrived at the door, it took a while to convince him about why the call had been made.

Bro is a bit manic and bi-polar -- can be a real A** sometimes . . .

Know what happens when a cop's kid calls the cops on Dad?

A real shitshow. My niece reported my brother at school for spanking her the night before, and they had 3 people from CPS and a ADA at the school to interview her.

Over a spanking because she told his wife (her step-mother) to fuck off.

 

[nOOky]

If you want woke, go read the comments regarding the Yellowstone controversy. Pretty entertaining.

 

[hal2kilo]

What's more dangerous? Parents smoking pot or being radicalized by Tucker Carlson?

That one is easy to answer.

 

[dawp]

What's more dangerous? Parents smoking pot or being radicalized by Tucker Carlson?

both? token a J while watching tuckie?

 

[shortylickens]

I like this kid. More brains and decency then the parents.

Both of my parents became worse and worse as time went on. My mother didnt have much free time from that fucking law firm and she spent most of it glued to Fox News. It turned 180 degrees from what she used to believe in. Kinda scary.

 

[Bitek]

Haha

 

[Viper1j]

I'm old enough to remember there was a time, when Tucker would have been locked in a room, and they would throw away the room.

Where's Joe McCarthy when the country really needs him?

 

[ivwshane]

I'm old enough to remember there was a time, when Tucker would have been locked in a room, and they would throw away the room.

Where's Joe McCarthy when the country really needs him?

Lol Tucker and Fox are Joe McCarthy reincarnated!

 

[KMFJD]

she's right you know

 

[BonzaiDuck]

As a 74-year-old male "what" American, A-O-C quickly earned my respect and admiration. But here, I might disagree with her slightly about what "woke" means. I'll explain when and why I "woke" up.

For me, I "awakened" three decades ago when I was sitting on the Washington DC metro next to a middle-aged blond woman in a mink stole, who told me she worked for GHW Bush. I explained that I worked in the US Dept. of Education. Right away, the woman opines that "Poor kids shouldn't attend school with wealthy kids because it creates unreasonable expectations." And immediately, I thought that she was entitled to her opinions, but it seemed mean-spirited to assert such an idea to a total stranger.

As someone who thought he was a Republican, I slowly began to embrace class struggle. And later, I realized that the GOP was a political ally of Big Oil, which always seemed to be standing in the background over several wars -- most recently two that were unnecessary in their cost or the length of their prosecution.

I shed my "racial identity" as a "what person" distinct from persons of color a long time ago. But wokeness involves more general aspects than just class and racial justice.

I think it' s just wisdom and common sense.

AOC is one smart lady, with looks to boot. Apparently, the Trump base doesn't trust or like smart people; they assume that it only makes someone more capable of deceit. So they chose the Master Deceiver for their president. But in order to be smart, one must have special reverence for the Truth. Compare AOC to the Trump spokes-woman Kaleigh McEnany ("Smack-a-ninny") who graduated from Harvard. McEnany is a dummy. And -- a liar.

As for AOC, I wish I was 40 years younger, still living in the DC Metro area and working a block or two away from AOC's office.

 

[nakedfrog]

As a 74-year-old male "what" American, A-O-C quickly earned my respect and admiration. But here, I might disagree with her slightly about what "woke" means. I'll explain when and why I "woke" up.

She's not saying that's what it actually means, she's saying the GQP's handlers are using it that way, and rather successfully.

 

[BonzaiDuck]

She's not saying that's what it actually means, she's saying the GQP's handlers are using it that way, and rather successfully.

Actually, you're quite correct. You might also be a "smart" person"!

A good smart person should also be capable of the humility to suspect that they aren't so smart. And then, to take some solace that they are . . .

 

[Viper1j]

Lol Tucker and Fox are Joe McCarthy reincarnated!

Joe McCarthy hunted anti-Americans.

Tucker is as anti-American as it gets.

 

[HomerJS]

As a 74-year-old male "what" American, A-O-C quickly earned my respect and admiration. But here, I might disagree with her slightly about what "woke" means. I'll explain when and why I "woke" up.

For me, I "awakened" three decades ago when I was sitting on the Washington DC metro next to a middle-aged blond woman in a mink stole, who told me she worked for GHW Bush. I explained that I worked in the US Dept. of Education. Right away, the woman opines that "Poor kids shouldn't attend school with wealthy kids because it creates unreasonable expectations." And immediately, I thought that she was entitled to her opinions, but it seemed mean-spirited to assert such an idea to a total stranger.

As someone who thought he was a Republican, I slowly began to embrace class struggle. And later, I realized that the GOP was a political ally of Big Oil, which always seemed to be standing in the background over several wars -- most recently two that were unnecessary in their cost or the length of their prosecution.

I shed my "racial identity" as a "what person" distinct from persons of color a long time ago. But wokeness involves more general aspects than just class and racial justice.

I think it' s just wisdom and common sense.

AOC is one smart lady, with looks to boot. Apparently, the Trump base doesn't trust or like smart people; they assume that it only makes someone more capable of deceit. So they chose the Master Deceiver for their president. But in order to be smart, one must have special reverence for the Truth. Compare AOC to the Trump spokes-woman Kaleigh McEnany ("Smack-a-ninny") who graduated from Harvard. McEnany is a dummy. And -- a liar.

As for AOC, I wish I was 40 years younger, still living in the DC Metro area and working a block or two away from AOC's office.

Incel right wingers take joy in trashing AOC at the same following her around the capital taking pictures of her ass. Republicans are a bunch of dirtbags.