Is there a way of getting married with the GF in secret..

[Nitemare]

either that or have your friend grow a pair and tell the parents he is marrying here or just doing it and then telling them to deal with it

 

[Captante]

Originally posted by: fisher
why do people even try that "let's just say some guy" stuff anymore?

if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

QFT !!!

 

[manowar821]

The "guy" is an adult, correct? He can do anything he likes without the permission or knowledge of the parents.

Usually, a dialog with the parents can solve whatever the issue is, though. So I'd recommend that first, you know, to NOT be a coward. However, if they're belligerent and closed minded traditionalists, fuck 'em. It's not the couple's fault that the parents don't understand love. He tried to be nice, their loss.

 

[kranky]

Originally posted by: fisher
if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

I can see where getting married without telling anyone might be the thing to do in some situations. Some parents might battle to the death to prevent a wedding, but if the deed is already done they have to deal with it. Nothing left to fight about.

 

[TruePaige]

You need to man up before getting married.

Heck, you didn't even man up enough to tell us without some ol' 3rd person bull.

 

[alchemize]

I did this - technically I got married twice. Once just with me and the Mrs. secretly in a different county, then again the "public" ceremony. At the time we did it for insurance benefits, tax benefits, and to relieve her sense of "living in sin".

 

[Anubis]

Originally posted by: kranky

Originally posted by: fisher
if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

I can see where getting married without telling anyone might be the thing to do in some situations. Some parents might battle to the death to prevent a wedding, but if the deed is already done they have to deal with it. Nothing left to fight about.

while I agree with what you said, i have to say that the OP is raising the main sail on the Failboat

 

[SaoFeng]

Originally posted by: fisher
why do people even try that "let's just say some guy" stuff anymore?

if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

OP can't even man up to admit it's himself in his post!!

 

[Drekce]

Originally posted by: AbsolutDealage

... marriage is just a piece of paper. What's the difference if you have it or not?

Marriage should most definitely not be just a piece of paper. I wonder if that mentality is what has led this country to have such a high divorce rate.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: Anubis

Originally posted by: kranky

Originally posted by: fisher
if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

I can see where getting married without telling anyone might be the thing to do in some situations. Some parents might battle to the death to prevent a wedding, but if the deed is already done they have to deal with it. Nothing left to fight about.

while I agree with what you said, i have to say that the OP is raising the main sail on the Failboat

Well not everyone has great relationships with their family.

Second the OP should know mommy and daddy always find out everything

I know a few people that are married for certain reasons and not much of anyone knows they aren't just bf/gf living together.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: Drekce

Originally posted by: AbsolutDealage

... marriage is just a piece of paper. What's the difference if you have it or not?

Marriage should most definitely not be just a piece of paper. I wonder if that mentality is what has led this country to have such a high divorce rate.

His point was that paper doesn't change anything.

 

[Descartes]

I can understand why some people do it. I'm married to wonderful woman that came from an extremely conservative Indian family. They wanted her to marry someone from her state, her city, her language, her religion and her caste (some of these are redundant). To do anything else is practically taboo, and it took over a year for them to finally give up and realize they couldn't change her mind.

So, I can empathize with people that do it. I know of another couple that got married on a boat in Cleveland; I guess boat captains in Ohio can legally marry? It's one thing if you're 18 and acting out of rebellion, but if you're an established adult and you are with someone you love, then why should you really wait for everyone else to grow up and realize that?

I agree with some of the others about approaching the family though, but in my case even that didn't matter. It just takes time...

 

[Descartes]

Originally posted by: Captante

Originally posted by: fisher
why do people even try that "let's just say some guy" stuff anymore?

if you can't grow enough of a sack to tell your parents, you should definitely NOT be getting married.

QFT !!!

I'm assuming OP is Asian, and if so, then the culture in this respect is so vastly different to how westerners treat it that it's really hard to understand unless you've lived with it. As I said in my earlier post, I had to fight this with my wife for a year, and I still don't understand it.

In America, talking back to your parents isn't a big deal. Being independent, doing as you wish, etc. also isn't that big of a deal, but in many Asian families those options simply aren't present unless you want to alienate your entire family.

It's a tough battle, and while I don't understand it it's one I empathize with on both sides. Parents want to maintain their cultural lines, and the children just want to do what they think is best to make them happy.

 

[jjones]

Why would you want to shoulder your bride to be with this burden? If she had any sense she would tell you to grow a pair, or better yet, leave you at the Dumpsville exit on the highway of life.

 

[alkemyst]

I am not sure what the burden is...how does anyone know when one is married vs just living together?

 

[theeedude]

Do it like Braveheart

 

[altonb1]

Originally posted by: bctbct
varies from state to state, ask your parents for the laws in your state

Perfect solution!

 

[maziwanka]

well the OP hasn't responded yet, so this thread is officially in the shitter

 

[IronWing]

Originally posted by: alchemize
I did this - technically I got married twice. Once just with me and the Mrs. secretly in a different county, then again the "public" ceremony. At the time we did it for insurance benefits, tax benefits, and to relieve her sense of "living in sin".

Same here except the part about living in sin. We saved hundreds in taxes and car insurance.

 

[alkemyst]

Originally posted by: senseamp
Do it like Braveheart

Try to make her confess her love, then rip her bowels out?